I found this poem...is it good?

Here's the poem (dont mean to copyright!):

The ringing in my ears, the stinging, burning, agonizing ringing turned into a thick and foggy Dum of my heartbeat.

I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to tell myself it was my imagination. I clawed at the side of my face, at my ears.

Panting, I ran out of my room and raced down the stairs. Frantically I found the scissors and picked them up, shaking. I looked longingly at them; feeling rushed and threw them in the opposite direction.

I would not cave! Whoever- whatever was happening- I would not let it win!

I picked up the phone, listening for the dial tone. The ringing blended in, so I could barely make out anything else.

Screeching, covering my ears I ran, blind with fear and pain- out my house.

Not caring if it was dark,

Not caring if it was cold,

And not caring if I looked mad-

Put a stop to this madness! Put a stop to the ringing! That awful ringing!

Was I burning alive? Was I melting alive? No. I was going crazy! For no one else could hear this firecracker- loud whistling that surely would’ve caused a ruckus.

What else could I do at that point? No- I could not do anything more insane, yet I could not stay partially sane with the beating mocking me and the ring blistering my ears.

What else could I have done? Than to put an end to the madness?

6 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    I'm got my degree in English Literature. With that said, I judge poetry slightly differently than most people. Many people can write a good poem, but that poem has been said before in a similar way. Poetry has been around a very long time. Free verse, rhyme schemes, blank verse, sonnets... the evolution of poetry has reached a peak where few things can be said any better than have already been said.

    How I judge a poem for its quality today is if that poem communicates something in a way that has never been done before. That's the first measurement of quality. Also, does the poem overextend itself? How well is it truly written?

    Still, if I rated this poem on a scale of one to ten, you might feel wounded by my honesty. Most poets are sensitive. I would give it a 4 on a scale of 1 to 10. That's the best I've ever read to the least as an English major. Even though you might not get published, those are still your thoughts, and that still makes them valuable. Anyway, even great poets are pretty poor in the end. One of my professors told my class something once. He said if you write one thousand trash poems and only pull it off once, you should feel delighted! Just once. Just to do it once like no one ever did - that should be the goal of every poet who aspires to be remembered. :) Don't stop. One day, you might just pull off one of the greatest poems of your time.

  • 1 decade ago

    It shows potential. It could use some reworking, a different structure... I personally don't like to use full sentences in poetry, but that's just a personal preference.... If you're in high school or college and you really want to make it better I'd talk to one of your English professors about getting a better critique. I'm terrible with constructive criticism....

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    the idea is good but the writing is all wrong..

    it would be better if it was shroter and each line would only have like max 5 or 7 words

    it would sound beter and wouldnt be so boring (not that it is but yes it does kinda bor the reader)

    its kinda repetitive to.. but good idea who ever wrote this

  • dalmas
    Lv 4
    4 years ago

    Offal - i can't consume any of it. yet i detect olive oil yummy purely with a splash salt added, and that i comprehend others locate it yucky. I additionally love black pudding, made ideally from pigs' blood, and others locate that yucky. And the 1st Mate loves garlic, which repels me at a hundred yards (or metres, or meters, as you elect).

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  • 1 decade ago

    erm.... maybe its good, i don't like it it doesn't seem to have any form but i dunno maybe im just a little old fashioned when it comes to poems. i like poe and poems like the Laboratory which i guess is a similar sort of genre

  • 1 decade ago

    *yawn*

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