Nosy Parent? Please Help!?
I just turned 13 last month, and my mom is starting to get very nosy. Everytime Im watching a show on TV, she'll check the rating. Like if Im watching something TV14, I have to change it. Yesterday, I found her going through my MP3 player, and my cell phone. She also went in my purse and found my progress report from school. Its not that I didn't want her to see it, I just didn't give it to her. And she thought that I was keeping it a secret. I am very responsible and there is no reason why she shouldn't trust me. I know Im still a child but, everyone needs their privacy. Ive tried telling her this, but her response is always, "As long as you live in my house, you have no privacy. Nothing is kept secret." Well if that's the case, I dont want to live in her house. I was thinking about running away.
Whats should I do?!
- 1 decade agoFavorite Answer
my mom was like that for awhile... she'll outgrow it. if she doesn't then just sit her down and talk to her.
if worse comes to worse, the next few years go reeeeaaallly fast
- teresathegreatLv 71 decade ago
You have a right to privacy, but she also has a right to be involved in your life, and to monitor what you do, for your own safety and well-being. So you need to work out a compromise that you can both live with.
Talk calmly with your mom and work out a set of rules and rights that seem reasonable. For example, you could agree to TV/music/movies that are PG13 or milder (hey, it's only one more year until you reach TV14) and give her your progress reports within 24 hours. In return, she can't snoop in your stuff - she has to ask your permission first. If she catches you breaking the rules, then you forfeit all TV/music privilieges for two weeks.
The phone solution is simple - you get a part-time job and pay for the phone bill yourself. There are plans designed for teens that let you put in a certain amount of money, and then the phone turns off when you run out.
Remind her that everyone is innocent until proven guilty, and everyone has a right to be trusted until they abuse that trust - therefore your have a right to privacy until you use that privacy for bad things. Offer a compromise - you share with her openly and honestly each day about your life, and she respects your privacy. If you openly tell her what you ARE doing, then she doesn't have to guess what you MIGHT be doing.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
If it makes you feel any better I am 25 years old. I have thought about turning on the parental filter to block out certain shows on my TV. It seems like every time I turn on the TV there is some naked body part around. I get really tired of it and the TV14 programs can be bad.
There is a lot of bad stuff out there and crazy people. You are young and your mom is doing her best to protect you. Many parents don't care about their teenagers and they get in big trouble.
I do feel that at the age of 13 you should have some private space. My favorite private time is when I pray. My faith and prayer life is personal and cannot be intruded upon by anyone.
I don't know if you're a religious person but try watching EWTN. I converted to the Catholic Church in 2004 after watching EWTN. Your mom may be less stressed if you learned about chastity. Check out the links below.
Don't run away! I know it's hard but someday you'll be grateful that your mom is bugging you right now.
Eternal Word Television Network - http://www.ewtn.com
Catholic Answers - http://www.catholic.com
What is Chastity - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BZajdR6Q-Lw
Why Chastity? - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UOKlBs9Tdjc
More About Chastity - http://www.youtube.com/bostonrespectlife
Pure Love Club - http://www.chastity.com
- Anonymous1 decade ago
DO NOT RUN AWAY JUST BECAUSE OF SOMETHING AS LITTLE AS A PRIVACY ISSUE!!!!! THAT IS STUPID! just hide your stuff, keep your progress reports at school, i dont know get a little box with a lock, it is not your moms buisness to be looking through your stuff and as long as you have done nothing to make her not trust you, you have the right to privacy. tell her this or ask another family member to help and you can sit down and talk about this....when i have things that i dont want my parents to see i hide them!!!
is there a way to put a pasword on some of your things like cellphone or mp3?
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- Wagon BurnerLv 51 decade ago
Don't run away. She may feel your growing up so fast and it's freaking her out.
She may also feel your not being as open about your life as you used to be.
This will keep going on, trust me. As long as you have nothing to hide don't worry. It is annoying but bear it.
Try being more open with her. Tell her all about your day when you come home. Let her know your interests and things you Enjoy doing.
Even let her know about your dating and friends.
She will feel good about this and wont *snoop as Much.*
It wont go away but might calm down
- California GirlLv 41 decade ago
DONT RUN AWAY from home just find a right time to sit down and talk to her about the way she has been acting and the way it has been making you feel
- 1 decade ago
Talk about it to her..i know this doesn't work sometimes, but be VERY dramatic about it and really let her know she is being nosy!