Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Pregnancy & ParentingPregnancy · 1 decade ago

26 weeks and caught him cheating?

im 26 weeks pregnant , i caught my husband talking to one of my friends online about how he would have sex with her , sending her pics of his penis , her sending pics of her breasts.

i have decided to forgive him . i have 3 kids (almost) with him

why is he all of a sudden all over me ?

how long till it stops hurting so bad

i cry when he trys to put his hands on me or kiss me

Update:

i want to try to work it out because i personally believe marriage should be forever

Update 2:

hell no i am not still friends with her it took me an hour to decide not to run her over with my car

13 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    I commend you for trying to make it work for the kids, but I don't think I could forgive my husband for any type of infidelity. If the trust is not there and resentment has built up, then the relationship is not worth it to me. It doesn't help the kids to have parents that don't even like each other anymore. Kids will catch on if you are just staying together for the sake of the kids. I am by no means saying for you to leave. I just don't think the "for the kids" argument is always really best for the kids. If you can work it out, GREAT, but if not, it's not going to ruin your kids' lives.

    I wouldn't be able to move past the pictures being taken of his penis...that is just pure filth to me. YUCK

  • 1 decade ago

    Well... i'm gonna tell you something that you don't want to hear... the likely hood that this type of thing wont happen again is slim. Men can be pigs (not all of them), but the ones that are... just are. How you will ever be able to forgive him, i don't know... but staying with someone who cheats on you is only gonna hurt you in the long run. If you can truely let it go and move on with your relationship than you are a stronger person than me. I also want to add that even though it may be tough to leave someone when there are kids involved... it is NEVER a reason to stay and be treated like crap! I truely hope everything works out for you... you do not deserve to be treated like that... especially during pregnancy which is emotional enough as is! Maybe you guys should really discuss what happened... and since he is your husband... you should be able to tell how sincere he is being! Best of luck to you... i'm sure you'll find support no matter what the outcome is!

  • 1 decade ago

    Some guys are just jerks like this, it doesn't mean he is necessarily over you, he probably is just getting bored. I know that isn't something you want to hear, but it is the truth. A lot of guys can get a little bored with their relationships at some points (girls too) but there are the few out there who decide to cheat while they are in this 'boring' period of time. You obviously haven't truly forgiven him, you forgave him in words but not in your heart, and either you never will be or it will take a long long time. I am so sorry to hear this though, i dont know what i would do if this happened to me. But you shouldn't of just forgave him and taken him back. Someone who dos this when they're married and have 3 kids aren't good people and don't want to be faithful. You need to find someone who will be more faithful and responsible. Leave him and share custody with him for your kids. Good luck hun and im very sorry.

  • The hurt never goes away there's always going to be that burden deep down in your heart. But you have to face it things happen and you have to move on from there and be strong for your children especially for the one that your carrying right now. Right now your a bit more emotional then usual cause of the baby. But i say if you cant get over it seek a family therapist they can help you much better in your time of need.The reasons hes doing all that is cause he feels guilty and he knows what he did was wrong and he firgues that would help if he was more affection too you. Good luck to you and hope everything works out for the best.

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  • 1 decade ago

    If I caught my husband doing this I would automatically assume he was already having sex with her, and if not her that he is having sex with someone else. Hun, you need to take some time to really deal with this. leaving him may not be the answer and if you are willing to stay with him no matter what you need to let him know and get him to be completely honest with you about what has been going on.

  • 1 decade ago

    you need to seek professional help to work through this. You resent him at this point, and him touching you will most likely make you cringe until you get the help you need and work through this. Although you have decided to forgive him you still have feelings that are being repressed and until they are in the open and worked through, they will be there.

    Best wishes, bless you for working through this - and hang in there, it is entirely possible!

  • 1 decade ago

    I strongly recommend marriage counseling if you want to make your marriage work. My husband (my then fiance) cheated on me with someone I didn't know. I can't imagine if it was a friend. They both betrayed you.

    More importantly- you have to make sure you want to stay in the marriage and especially if you can trust him again.

  • 1 decade ago

    He feels guilty and he was caught. Don't belive he will never do it again although some are faithful forever after something like that I personally don't share and could not. Good luck to you

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    A relationship is never the same after infidelity. You can forgive but you will never forget! I understand you trying for your children, but I hope you didn't forgive her!

  • 1 decade ago

    because you truly haven't forgiven him.

    i know how you feel though ]: don't think about it or talk about it although it's hard and you will blank some of it out.

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