Wow sweetie, that's terrible I am so sorry!!
I hate to even say this, but did he maybe want a boy more then a girl and some how feels let down or dissapointed that your having a daughter? Not that it would be any reason for him to behave this way, but some of the things you are saying seem to point in the direction of that.
If I were you I would stop doing all those things for him. He is a grown man, and if he can't help and support his pregnant wife then why should she do all those things for him? Stop getting up a 2 am to drive him a block away, stop making his lunches and doing his laundry. He needs to pitch in too. Tell him you can see this is going no where and you are hurt to the point that you cry all day every day you want to go to counceling (that will trigger something) if he wont listen to you then do you have a place, like a friend or a parents house you can go stay at? All this stress and crying is not healthy for your baby, and maybe he needs to see you away for a bit, to see all the things you do. When the baby is born you are going to have a lot more on your plate. And babysitting him is not going to be first priority.
Now it is hard on the husband too when the wife is pregnant, sometimes they don't know how to act or what to think, but this coming from a grown man who wanted to have a baby is obscure.
Have you thought about writing him a letter? Maybe print out your question here and give it to him in a letter format. Maybe he will see how you really feel, if he is not listening to you and you 2 are not discussing this then he really doesn't know how bad you are hurting and how much of an idiot he is being.
Good Luck hun, I hope this gets better for you soon:)