How bad is a dishonorable discharge?

I just need some honesty here, please no rude answers. Right now I am emotionally pretty low and my heart is broken. My husband is deployed and my doctor says that our unborn baby is in danger. His command will not let him come home even though I did contact the red cross and my doctor signed a statement saying he reccomends my husband's presense at the birth. I just want my husband home, no matter the cost. That said, I KNOW I don't really want him to be dishonorably discharged. Please help me understand exactly what it would be for him to be dishonorably discharged. I don't want people to try to scare me, just honest answers from people who really know. I know my husband signed a contract and he is not about to back out, even though we both are quite frustrated right now. He is not one to quit. I just am needing something to help me stop wishing for bad things to happen (the dishonerable discharge), I guess I feel understanding how bad one is will help me. Also, anybody who would give me a little friendly encouragement would be appreciated. I know many wives go through this and am NOT the only one by far. Also, for those who may say I shouldn't have gotten pregnant knowing my husband would be deployed, I didn't know and it's hard for a military family to plan pregnancies around deployments. My husband is in Iraq but doesn't even have orders to be there which I didn't know could happen. We were not infomred of this year long deployment until a few months ago and even then were only given three possible MONTHS it could happen. We knew the actual date only weeks before he left. Thanks in advance for the info.

Update:

Oh, and he is in the US Army. Thanks

Update 2:

I know that it doesn't mean prison. I know a few guys who have been dishonerably discharged. Not friends but you meet people in the military. Please, I want answers from people who know what they are talking about.

Update 3:

I did a little research myself and learned that a dishonorable discharge is usually handed down to somebody who is going to jail, jail is not because of the dishonorable discharge the discharge is because of the jail. I also learned that I have asked my question incorrectly. The dishonorable discharge is for people who murder and stuff like that. There are tons of other "less than honorable" discharges. I guess I am asking in general, the bad effects of any of those discharges... although I do realize that we do not want one at this point.

Update 4:

Just a note, my husband will not go AWOL. That isn't something we would do... as we are not trying to get dishonorably discharged. I just wanted a firm reason to stop kinda hoping he can come home for even bad reasons. I know it isn't right.

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  • 1 decade ago
    Best Answer

    Im leaving to the navy within †Ψě next few months and will most likely not be present Ƒøř! My daughters first birthday. By †Ψě time her and my husband come to live with me on base she will be a year and half. Î ₪ø! Our situations are a little bit different but in †Ψě end, †Ψě point îŠ łµåł sometimes we have to face challenges. Î joined †Ψě navy so łµåł my family and î could be secure even if something were to happen to me. Unfortunately †Ψě army îŠ different from †Ψě navy and in these times †Ψě army requires Řěåłłÿ Řěåłłÿ long deployments meaning close to 15 months at a time while †Ψě navy only requires around 6 maybe a lil more and some short ones in between. So when Ů think about ÿøůř husband being dishonorably discharged, think about ÿøůř daughter and her future because most likely it wont be ₩凿 u want Ƒøř! Her due to †Ψě discharge. And ©ø₯ forbid something were to go wrong, think about ÿøůř future kids and their lives. Biut everything will turn out okay and ©ø₯ will protect ÿøůř baby girl. ©ø₯ bless u and be strong.

  • 3 years ago

    Dishonorable Discharge

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I saw your earlier post. I know this is a difficult situation and I really wish your husband were there. Even if your husband were to be dishonorably dishcarged (which you really don't want), he would not be able to get home from Iraq in a timely enough manner to be there with you. I've seen a dishonorable discharge drag out for six months. I've also seen several dishonorable discharges that resulted in jail time. So you are correct, a dishonorable dishcharge is not for your family.

    How about a cesearan and getting that kid out of there? I'm not sure if your doctor is on board with that?

    Source(s): AD AF
  • 1 decade ago

    A dishonorable discharge is meant to disgrace a person. In other words, your husband would feel like he had let down his friends, team, and country. I'm sure you don't want him to carry something like that throughout his life. I'm hoping you have family that can come be with your or that you can go to them for the support you need at this time.

    If your baby is due in a couple weeks, your doctor should be comforting and reassuring you that you can be just as strong as your husband is where he is serving. My son has delivered many, many babies; and the only time he has ever had any unusual issues with a birth has been something unplanned. Thank goodness your doctor already knows and will be prepared for any unusual circumstances. I pray that God will bless you with a beautiful, healthy baby.

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  • Anonymous
    4 years ago

    This Site Might Help You.

    RE:

    How bad is a dishonorable discharge?

    I just need some honesty here, please no rude answers. Right now I am emotionally pretty low and my heart is broken. My husband is deployed and my doctor says that our unborn baby is in danger. His command will not let him come home even though I did contact the red cross and my doctor signed a...

    Source(s): bad dishonorable discharge: https://shortly.im/f37kO
  • 5 years ago

    Please......PLEASE don't do anything that is going to reflect badly on your husband. I can imagine that there are a million emotions going on right now within you. You need to keep in mind that if your husband was dishonorably discharged from the military that is something that is going to be stapled to every job application/resume that he fills out for the rest of his life. If he is going to be dishonorably discharged, let HIM be the one to do it by his own actions not you with yours.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I'm serving Active Duty in the US Air Force - everything I will discuss herein is applicable to all 5 branches of the US Military. Additionally, my boyfriend is serving AD in the US Army, so I am a military girlfriend of sorts.

    First of all, a dishonorable discharge can only be assigned to a case if the service member in question is court-martialed, so don't assume he'll be dishonorably discharged unless he does something very intense, IE he goes AWOL.

    A dishonorable discharge is pretty bad. It will stay on his permanent record forever; whenever he fills out an application, there will be a spot saying, "Have you ever served in any component of the US Military?" and he will have to check "yes." If the employer runs a check on his military records, they'll know he got a dishonorable discharge.

    Anyone with a dishonorable discharge is entered into NICS, which is what police officers look at when they pull you over. This means he will be permanently ineligible to possess a firearms license, and if he does get a dishonorable discharge he will have a lot of difficulty getting a job in any civil or governmental position.

    It's not like he has to wear a scarlet letter on his chest. :)

    Please understand why your husband can't come home: If he were to leave, it's not as if the Army could just send someone to replace him. His spot would be empty, and that could put other Soldiers in danger.

    I totally understand how hard it must be - it's hard enough that he's missing the pregnancy, and now you must be terrified of complications and of delivering alone. But you're an Army wife; that means you're Army STRONG, and you [both] can get through this! Is there any way that you can have a brother, sister, father, mother, father-in-law, mother-in-law, cousin, uncle, or grandparent present? I know it's not the same, but at least it's a comforting presence.

    And maybe someone could film the birth and send it to him? Remember, other Army wives have gotten through this before, and you can too.

    Best wishes.

    -----------EDIT---------------

    As Cordelia said, the paperwork, etc. required for a dishonorable discharge can drag on for months. I've never seen one last 6 months - but I have seen several last for 3. If the servicemember in question is in Iraq, it's likely to be even lengthier.

    -----------EDIT---------------

    Goodness this is getting long! :X

    Other than honorable discharges, general discharges, etc. are much less serious. He would have difficulty re-enlisting in any branch of the US Military (and it sounds like he's a good Soldier who enjoys what he does), and he would have difficulty getting any type of a governmental or civil job.

    Again, however, he wouldn't be able to be back by November. These things take quite a while to process. I know it's really tough, but you're probably going to have to deliver without him. I looked into your other questions and saw that the condition you have is quite common. My mother had it in both her pregnancies; with me it eventually straightened itself out and I was delivered vaginally; with my sister, she had to have a C-section, which is not a big deal. With today's medical technology, there's absolutely nothing to worry about. I know that isn't much coming from me; you don't even know me - but talk to your doctor about it more in-depth.

    Source(s): AD in USAF Boyfriend is AD in US Army
  • 1 decade ago

    Contact the Chaplain at the base where your husband is stationed and he may be able to get your husband home on emergency leave.

    Unless there is an overriding mission related reason, his commander should be willing to let him have leave to see his child born.

    Don't encourage your husband to do anything illegal or stupid. The system will work with you if you work with it.

    Yes, a Dishonorable Discharge is a bad thing. Your husband would not be able to get a government job and his civilian options would be very limited.

  • 1 decade ago

    A dishonorable discharge is about severe of a punishment as it gets. You're put between a rock and a hard place right now, and although I know it's difficult, you must have a positive outlook and a little faith. My significant other is in the Army as well so I know how hard things can get sometimes, but I cannot, for the life of me, imagine how hard this is for you. I wish you the best of luck and I want you to know that things will always work out in the end.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    You just have to note the 'dishonourable' bit and you get the idea that this is a bad thing. There must be other avenues for you - do you have social workers, chaplains? Make an appointment with them and take your paperwork. There will be more steps you can take but you need to seek further official advice. The most likely way of getting him home is by working with official channels. Chaplains have a lot of power in compassionate matters - ring him.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I understand you predicament, but if your Husband gets a Bad Conduct Discharge, he cannot never get a Government Job, and Civil servant Job or any really good job. I also believe that he will lose any military benefits that he had coming to him. His best bet is to NOT go AWOL and see if his Commands changes there mind and lets him come home. If not his and your life may be ruined. Good luck and God Bless. P.S. You need to go to your husbands base Chaplin and explain your situation he may be able to help you.

    Source(s): Retired Military
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