Starting to feel guilty about feeling 'depressed'?

Hi, I'm 16 and I think I may have a problem. For the last few years I have felt depressed in the evenings but over recent weeks it has started to creep into the daytime. (I feel crap when I am not distracted by others which is why I probably only really felt awful in the evenings)I keep my feelings completely to... show more Hi, I'm 16 and I think I may have a problem. For the last few years I have felt depressed in the evenings but over recent weeks it has started to creep into the daytime. (I feel crap when I am not distracted by others which is why I probably only really felt awful in the evenings)I keep my feelings completely to myself and act pretty happy and almost 'camp' but it's fake and I feel as if if I came out saying how I really feel noone would believe me. I don't actually want to let people know because I'd rather not face the consiquence of it becoming knowledge to others-especially my mum.

When I cry and feel rubbish I am now think 'What right do I have to feel depressed?' I have had nothing really bad happen to me in life to warrant such feelings. It seems the happier something makes me at the time not long later I will feel worse for it-I feel guilty for feeling guilty.

I know if I went to a doctor or something I'd just act how I normally act and they'd say I have no problem and then I'd be put down as an attention seeker.

I know logically emotion is a load of nonsense and I can explain why I feel the way I do and therefore dismiss it but despite how philosophical and I guess 'emotionally smart' I am I still feel this way and it gets me so down.

I don't know what to do really, Can I keep going on like this?

Sorry it's a long one, and sorry if you are bored of me rabbling on on here every few days or so.

If anyone can help me or direct me I'd be so greatful for it.

Thanks
Update: sorry if I use the word 'depressed' lightly-I don't know if I am genuinely depressed because I have never found out. I don't mean to offend anyone who does have depression.
Update 2: 'come out' as in feeling depressed. Not being gay(!)
Update 3: Sorry-This is in the wrong section.
Update 4: Sorry-This is in the wrong section.
Update 5: I'd actually rather my friends know. My mum wouldn't understand-She's not as open-minded or intellegent as I am, she is really judgemental. My sister is mentally ill(aspergers) and it has completely changed their relationship.
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