another poem. tell me what you think.?

I hold the blade

I place it on my skin

I make a small cut

But its way too thin

So i cut a little deeper

The blood begins to fall

Where did the pain go?

I cant feel any at all.

This isn't my first

It isn't my last

I'll do it in near future

I've done it in the past

I do it every day

Its become an addiction

I know its crazy

But i love self infliction

I know it can kill me

And it probably will

Im waiting for that day

That day will be such a thrill

I just cut even depper

Deeper than ever before

This time ill make it count

Ill cut til my hearts sore

Maybe this will do it

Maybe now ill die

Its what ive been waiting for

This is good bye.

Update:

I only particially write from experience. I have cut before, but i don't anymore. What i write comes from my heart. I can only write a poem this good when I'm feeling very sad/depressed. I don't kill myself because i choose to live; although my poems are depressing, right now i am semi-happy with my life. Thanks for being very supportive and telling me to kill myself, ill be sure to remember that next time I'm really depressed and close to killing myself. Thanks for the kudos though.

And also, for the person who corrected my way of writing...I don't need you correcting my work. If i wanted it to be written like that i would've wrote it like that. Thanks.

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Some of the lines were a little sketchy. Didn't care for this part; hold the blade

    I place it on my skin

    I make a small cut

    But its way too thin

    So i cut a little deeper

    The blood begins to fall

    Where did the pain go?

    I cant feel any at all.

    I know it can kill me

    And it probably will

    Im waiting for that day

    That day will be such a thrill

    Ill cut til my hearts sore? <------------ Heart is sore you mean?

    I find it funny that you can't take the criticism, yet you ask, "Tell me what you think?" If you can't handle the criticism then don't ask me what you want you want to hear. I'm not going to tell you it's brilliant. It's just alright. Nothing special to me and the girl below me is right if you wanted to kill yourself wouldn't you have done it already? Sounds like something is holding you back. Maybe the fact that your scared. Next poem should be "Holding Back." Get back to me when you've written a book.

  • 1 decade ago

    As beautiful as your poetry is, and as much as I love to read it, I sincerely hope that you aren't writing this from experience. However, if you are, know that you aren't alone. Many have been or are going through the things you have written about, myself included. Your work is chilling, and it takes great writing to have such an effect on the reader, so please take that as a compliment, because I sincerely mean it that way. I'm a fan through and through of your work. :) Keep it coming please :)

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    then why havn't you killed yourself yet? its not that hard. you sound like an attention seeking loser. kill yourself already before i kill myself from listening to another one of your poems.

    ps: addiction and infliction was a really good rhyme. kudos.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    If I was a vampire, I would be there for you.

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