I can't seem to get my life in order, what is the difference between hard working people and those who aren't?

A lady I live with goes to work 7 days a week and works for at least 12 hours every single day. And then there is me. I do nothing. I can't even keep my doctors appt. I hardly even go for a walk outside. I usually go out to the grocery store once a week. I hate my life and I hate the way that I am but yet year after year goes by and I still haven't changed. What is it that others have that I don't? Like lets say those who have made something out of their lives, how come I haven't, what am I missing? I want to change so bad but I'm terrified to go out there into the world. I just wish I could be like everyone else so to speak.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    You need motivation. But you don't need to get it from me or anybody else. (It may sound corny but)You can get it from what's within you. Whatever is hindering you from progressing in life is all in your head. There is no such thing as impossible. Set your mind on anything that you want and you will achieve just that.

  • 1 decade ago

    The thing you need to do, If you so choose to change, is do something even though you don't want to. It sounds to me that your a bit on the lazy side [ I admit that I am too, but I'm a teen so I have an excuse ] It could also be that they have found something they love to do. Once I get my career of computer programing I know I'll be working for maybe around 12 hours at least.

    I think you should find something you like and do it. If it may be a little embarrassing, do it anyway. If it seems uncool, Do it anyway. If you want to change, you got to have the will to change. and to build will, you just have to get up and do it gradually. like you could maybe once a week do something extra. then after it becomes natural do it twice and then three times then as soon as you know it your doing that extra thing all week.

  • 1 decade ago

    There's nothing holding you back. Do something drastically new. Find something that makes you happy and DO IT. Whether thats doing charity work, playing a sport, becoming a connoisseur of some sort, or whatever. Just put your mind to something.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    You've not had any real hardships that have made you realize that this life is it, your one chance at happiness, and you're sitting on your duff waiting for a sign.

    Here it is.

    You will get the sign when you realize that you've wasted your ONE life. By then it'll be too late.

    Or...

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  • 1 decade ago

    Happiness (interesting choice of name for such a sad lady);

    First, and most importantly, please do not wish to be like everyone else; for everyone is not living the life you perceive. Instead, focus on you, your self worth, character, interests, etc. I know that is easier said than done, but it is at least a starting point for a person who appears to be overwhelmed or even disgusted with her lack of interest in life. Sweetie, go easy on yourself. I do not know you. I do not know ally evaluate you on both a physical and psychological level. A good health care provider will work with you in providing appropriate medication (to stabilize the chemicals in your brain that are causing you to suffer from this illness) and therapy options that are chosen with your individual needs in mind and not just thrown out as an option that works across the board. You might be very surprised, given the appropriate treatment plan, that you are indeed capable of achieving great things and I happen to believe you are!

    Now, if I am incorrect and you have already ruled out the possibility of clinical depression and other potential mental illnesses; please excuse me. For if that is the case, then keep in mind that changing yourself at any age is one of, if not the most difficult things we choose to do in our lives. In fact, that is why so many people stay in situations that make them unhappy regardless; they simply do not want to put in the mental, physical and emotional work it takes to embark upon changing who you are. Maybe you can start slow, sit down and really think about the things in your life you would like to change and why. Make a list so that you can refer to it, add notes/comments and even adjust it as you move through the difficult scary process. Decide what things you are willing to work on changing first, for example keeping your Dr's appointment. And when you do keep that appointment, think about how you feel after. Does it make you feel a bit more committed to changing your lifestyle once you 'feel' the fulfillment of having kept a commitment or completed a task/goal on your list? It should, regardless of how small you think others might view the task, it is BIG to you and that is what you need to keep in mind. From there, pick another thing on your list like going for a walk. After you go on that walk, document how you feel which should encourage you to continue to take these steps! Finally, at some point when you feel you are ready, think long and hard about the people you refer to as having "made something out of their lives". What does that 'something' look like to you? Is that 'something' even important enough to you or is there something you would view as an accomplishment so huge that by achieving it you would allow yourself to recognize that you are equally as hard working, worthy and capable as the people you view as successful! If changing yourself was easy, then I do not know of one person who would not change something about his/herself. It is the hardest damn thing you may ever do, but your desire to do it reassures me that you are quite capable of doing it, but it is you who has to be reassured and believe that it can and will happen, just not over night. It is a long, grueling process that can teach you so many insightful and amazing things about yourself! Please, be patient, don't expect too much too soon for then you will feel defeated. Next, take small steps, steps that you know you can accomplish, and set your expectations realistically. I believe beyond a doubt that you do not want to live your life this way and that you will make the changes on your own terms which will in turn provide you with the self worth and confidence you seem to be lacking now! And always remember one thing; while we cannot control what happens to us in life, we can control how we respond to it and you my Dear have it in you, now just take the one small step forward and before you know it, you will be traveling the uncertain, terrifying path of change as if it were a path you have traveled with great excitement, ease and courage all your life! Please, keep me informed; I wish you nothing but the best, most importantly, I wish you to be relieved of such a heavy burden and allow yourself to feel happiness, confidence, courage and life!

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    wow, you are both extremes!!! what you both need is balance. do either of you have any fun? start small, get a part-time job, join a group. there is life out there but you have to go and find it.

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