Self destructive behavior. How do I deal with MYSELF?
The reason I'm asking in this section is because many people here have seen my chart and maybe they can give me some input on how to handle and restrain myself from the self destructive thoughts that I'm experiencing a lot of lately. I'm still so angry with my ex and it is starting to drive me insane. I completely blocked him and deleted him from everywhere I possibly could, but he has a new girlfriend and now I became obsessed with looking at her profile on the internet.Every day I check it secretly hoping that they have broken up, but they just seem so perfect together. I even looked at their compatibility based on birthdays and they have absolutely no negative aspects with each other. Like they have been made for each other or something.
Now I don't have any issues with the girl, she seems nice and sweet and has done nothing to me. My issues are with the ex, because I don't want him to be happy after what he did to me.
I know I sound psycho and I hate the way I feel but I cannot do anything about it, this anger is consuming me and there are times that I cannot focus on anything else.
I have never been an angry person and have never felt anything like this before there fore I don't know how to deal with myself to and get rid of this feeling. I see the negative traits of Scorpio shining bright and I do not like this at all.
People help me control myself please! Before I become a total Psycho B i t c h
Scorpio sun, Saturn, Rising and Pluto
Pluto square Mars and moon Conjunct Ascendant, Saturn conjunct Sun
Again, my problem is not with the girl, but with the *** who ruined a big chunk of my life. I don't want to do anything, I just want to forget I ever met him and for some reason I can't do that
I could care less about what he was up to, until recently when I came across his new gf's profile and saw the pictures of them together, which pissed me off. Because they even go to the same places he used to take me. We broke up almost 7 month ago and the only feelings I have towards him is hatred and anger
Free to be, I don't need a lecture thank you.
Tia, I'm sorry that you had to go through this, must have been terrible. They don't deserve us anyway. I just hope that this girl is not another victim
I didn't ask a question to rant but to help understand why this bothers me and what can I do to stop this. I will block anyone who's rude no matter how many accounts they use to get to me
Thank you everyone who has been supportive and not judgmental. I really have some self improvement to do
- 1 decade agoBest Answer
Hey Devo, I'm sorry to hear about what you're going through =( I don't really have any astrological advice to give since I'm still quite a novice. I just wanted you to know that what you're feeling is more common than you probably realize. It makes you feel resentful because you're thinking why did he treat me so bad but he's treating her so much better. Why was he such an @sshole to me when I did nothing to deserve to be treated like that? The thoughts can be obsessive because you can't believe that a person that treated you so horribly could find happiness that he doesn't deserve.
Trust me. I've been in your situation so many times I've lost count. My last ex had three girls pregnant at the same time that he was dating me. All I could do to make myself feel better was think hateful thoughts towards him and hope that someone would one day hurt his heart in the worst way.
I kept a journal to write down all my hateful thoughts about him. I usually took up about 5 pages at a time too. It was worth it to get it all out on paper and to have some sort of outlet. I also listened to a bunch of "I hate you" type screaming songs to release all of the negativity that I was feeling. Before it or not, it actually helped me move through all the pain and on with my life. I know everyone handles their anger in different ways and that might now work for you but I think you think an outlet. How about a punching bag with his face on it? =D
You're be alright though. I'm certain of it. My best friend is a Scorpio and is SO resilient. You guys are so strong emotionally and can bounce back from anything. If you need to talk your friends' ears off to vent then ask then if they don't mind if you rant and vent your feelings to them. Whatever you do, you have to get the anger out of your system somehow. In the meantime, keep this in mind. What goes around always comes back around again. Karma eventually caught up to my ex for what he did and we all have our day. Let that put your mind at ease =) And I agree with free to be about going out and having some fun. You deserve it missy and it will take your mind off of things. Good luck hon!
edit: I'm sorry you had to go through what you went through too =( The fact that you care about the new girl being the next victim shows how big your heart is and no they don't deserve us! Dastardly bastards =D
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Devo sweetheart listen...I know exactly how your feeling...and I'm here to talk anytime your up for it. Ok i'll give you my best advice..it worked for me, for the Aries and I will tell you how to get over this obsession.
Do me a favor and STOP going to that girls page. If theres any way you can 4get about the website, try to block it somehow so you wont allow yourself to go there, then we work on step 2, taking care of YOURSELF.
Remember the things you toled me...how I'm worth so much more...well we are, our body is worth more. I do understand the hate your feeling, and yes it looks as if he hurt you and got away with it and now hes flying free, happy while your in this pain..alone..sad..depress.
Well I think it's time to stop this BU*LSH*T...It makes me sad seeing you this way..take care of yourself. DONT GO TO HER PAGE EVER AGAIN...try to stop that...they probably look happy..but things can seem a certain way..and they are not in reality.
Ignore everything concerning them. He will surely get what he deserves. TRUST ME. I think you should focus on your goals and dreams. We go through so much hurt and pain in life...but in the end were the ones who are happy. Remember were the only ones who have the power to turn our lives into something positive.
Just try to focus on YOU, your job,school,family,friends and i god. Ignore what they are doing, or what he is doing. He wasn't the right person for you in the first place remember that..he was a person who came into your life and made you learn and grow to be a smarter person, he was the one who gained NOTHING and he is NOTHING.
Your so smart,beautiful and a wonderful friend, I hope you can get everything together..and put this guy in the trash where he belongs.Source(s): your buddy tril
- oneLv 41 decade ago
I don't think this would be about your chart, Hon. I think this is something most of us go through at some point in our life.
I wish there was something I could do or say to help you not feel so badly. I really do. I know this hurts so much right now to have all these conflicting emotions. I don't think you are being self-destructive to hope that they break up.
I just wanted to say something based on what I've observed of you on this astrology section. I have a very strong feeling that there is some gorgeous and bright young man who is absolutely crazy about you, and you haven't seen him yet because your mind has been on this.
- ChristyLv 44 years ago
Im no expert in this category... but i think that you should find a way to tell him how you feel. If you dont think that you can talk to him about it you could write an email or a letter or something. However you decide to tell him, i think that you really should. Just tell him how you have seen other friends and family get hurt from the same things that he is doing, you dont want him to suffer, and anything else you need to say...
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- Anonymous1 decade ago
Please send me your birth info and I will help you in any way I can.
I think maybe what you need right now is a transitional type relationship, one that is mainly fun. And no, I'm not talking about sex. Try to just go out and have fun. Stop worrying about "the one". Don't worry about the synastry. You are young. Enjoy life.
- ShiloLv 71 decade ago
Yes, it does sound like you are obssessing over this situation. What is the big chunk of life that he stole from you? And, is this the Aries guy you were talking about months ago?
If it is revenge that you are thinking would help you feel better with this situation, I would like to suggest that good (happy & successful) living is the best revenge.
- golden sindyLv 61 decade ago
scorpio's always do that holding on thing. it's really really hard for them to let go. their anger suffuses their very being, and it's all they can think about. it can last for months, often years. it drives them crazy, but also the intensity of the anger/obsession is also a way to feel "alive" and certainly addicting as any drugs.
i would often do that too. i couldn't stop, i drove myself crazy. and then one day, i saw how i was making myself sick. i saw how my g-friend (who was the same way - scorpio moon), drove herself crazy, got cancer and DIED. She killed herself.
i saw how miserable we all were. and then i realized -- we weren't punishing anyone but ourselves.
the guy got off scot-free (life is like that, life will take care of HIM) and here we were, delving into madness! for what? for HIM? THAT MEANS HE WINS.
After that, whenever someone would "get to me", I would see it happening again, and I would get furious with myself and absolutely refuses to ENGAGE or dwell. I aggressively moved my thoughts away, with my anger helping it along. NO way was I going to get sick on HIS account!
Also, what practical purpose does it have? Show yourself. There's really nothing except your own pain. Parent yourself and KEEP AWAY. Distract yourself with fun stuff. Do something crazy that takes your breathe away!
Good luck, mama. :-)Source(s): a member of the Scorpio club
- Hot Buns RisingLv 61 decade ago
hi honey I wish I could say more than what I already did on this matter and I am very sorry you are still feeling this way.
Other people seemed to already gave their opinions and you really need to help youself, for your ownsake honey .
Edit : hey Becareful what you wish for , go away......Source(s): hopefully I could catch you online sometimes.
- *Lovely Phoenix*Lv 41 decade ago
I have Mars square Pluto in my natal chart as well...It's only natural for you to feel this way hun. You probably still have feelings for your ex otherwise it wouldn't matter to you. One way to help you get over it is to stop looking at their pages. You're only hurting yourself. No one wants to see their ex happy. I would suggest to stop looking at their page (its the only way). What's his sun sign? What did he do to you?
- 1 decade ago
That's normal, it'll pass eventually. Just keep ignoring, and sending him positive energy to speed up your healing process.