Anonymous asked in Society & CultureReligion & Spirituality · 1 decade ago

Can I accept gay marriage and be a good Christian?

I'm really worried, because my family and many people at my church are very concerned about gay marriage being legalized. They think it's one of the worst sins and that letting gay people get married is justifying their behavior and leading to the destruction of the country.

I have been told that as a Christian, I am defying God for being okay with gay marriage.

I just don't see why other people's lives are my business. One of the cool things about America is that we have freedom. Laws are supposed to protect us from being killed or robbed, not to make sure that we all follow the Bible.

Plus, I know some gay people and they're really nice. Maybe they sin, but so do I.

Am I really defying God?

37 Answers

  • Isobel
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    No, in fact, you are being an extremely open-minded and loving Christian. In fact, I feel very relieved that there are such sensible Christians out there.

    These Christians who are actively speaking out against gay marriage are simply nosy people who can’t seem to understand that other adults’ lives are none of their business. Their stand is a display of homophobia and hypocrisy in action. Nothing is more exasperating and grieving that hearing homophobes, who say they believe in equality, then try to rationalize and justify their hatred of gay people and support for discrimination against them. It's really none of their business who other consenting adults marry. It's none of the government's business. And it's not the business of any religious organization either. If you do not support gay marriage then don't marry a gay person.

    Besides…gay people will still be gay regardless of whether they are allowed to get married. And legalizing same sex marriage won’t increase the number of homosexuals, either. The only thing that you could possibly accomplish by banning gay marriage would be making many gay people unhappy.

    “Laws are supposed to protect us from being killed or robbed, not to make sure that we all follow the Bible.” – What a wonderful quote.

    A star for you.

    Source(s): Atheist & happily engaged lesbian
  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I hear you. I am a Christian and I do not support gay marriage. On the other hand, I hope first of all that you are praying about this and asking God to reveal to you what he wants you to decide. He really is there to help you. I have observed this debate for some time and the most important thing I can say to support you is that there are many good Christians who support gay marriage. There in fact a lot of Christians who support ordaining gay clergy. These people have a relationship with God and yet they have taken such a stand. You are simply a follower and are not trained in such a way as these highly placed individuals are so you should not fear your relationship with God by accepting what in your heart seems to be acceptable. I guess my challenge from the topic is that I truly believe it to be a sin, just as lying, stealing, cheating on your spouse and even overeating are sins. Personally I don't see how the church would support endorsing any sin. I believe the church needs to be welcoming but not affirming to sinners.

    Good Luck and God Bless,

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  • Jacob
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    No, that is why it was never made illegal for them to be together.

    The issue with gay marriage is it opens churches up to lawsuits for hate speeches if they quote certain passages from the bible or expound on the doctrines.

    It would force churches to not only recognize but perform gay marriages in the church even if the dont want to.

    It would force children to learn in school that gay marriage is just as good and valid an option as Heterosexual marriage.

    Religious adoption agencies will be forced to give homosexual couples children even though it violates their beliefs.

    Schools will be forced to provide an allotment of homosexual married student housing from the existing married student homes on campuses. This applies even to private religious schools.

    The real issue here is about force. Homosexuals and Liberal judges are trying to force religions to accept something that God has declared wrong.

    This isnt much different than an organization trying to force religions to accept murder. God has said it is wrong, there is no more debate. This will lead to people choosing God or the Country.

    People want to convince you this is about allowing people happiness and freedom, they want to make it sound like this is a civil rights issue, but it isnt. Its about the right of religions to follow Gods word.

    It is about keeping the church and state separate. For Centuries we feared the church taking over the state and now we see the state taking over the church. That is what this is really about.

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  • Anonymous
    4 years ago


    The practice of homosexuality is destructive to the human soul and God gave His warnings about this in the Bible. Supporting gay marriage is a sin because it means to support homosexuality. If a nation legalizes gay marriage, that nation will be cursed.

    Iniquities (sinful tendencies) pass down the generation line if they are not removed by the Blood of the Lord Jesus. Homosexuality is caused by iniquity and the Blood of Jesus cleanses the iniquities of all who accept Him as their Saviour.

    After a person accepts the Lord Jesus as their Saviour, they are transformed and made a new creature in Christ (2 Corinthians 5:17). So the gay person would be changed and so would the alcoholic, liar, drug addict, fornicator etc. It's the power of the Blood of Christ and the Holy Spirit in the believer that brings about this transformation.


    Because mankind is incapable of meeting God’s standard of perfection necessary to abide in God’s presence (Romans 3:19-20,23), God sent His Son Jesus Christ to pay the total debt for the believer’s sins and mercifully credits to his account Christ’s righteousness (Romans 3:21-28,5:1-11; 2 Corinthians 5:18-21). Jesus’ gracious act of atonement was complete and covers all sin (Colossians 2:13-14; 1 John 1:9). Salvation is not based on good deeds but according to the mercy of God (Titus 3:4-5). Believers are justified by faith; it is a gift by God’s grace (Romans 4:3-8; Ephesians 2:8-9). A true, living faith will result in a desire to live a holy, loving life of good works (Ephesians 2:10; Galatians 5:6; James 2:14-26), but failure to be absolutely successful at righteous living does not negate the believer’s justified status.

    If you sincerely say this prayer, your sins will be washed away, you will be redeemed to God, be saved from eternal torment and inherit the Kingdom of God:

    "Dear Jesus,

    I am a sinner.

    I repent of my sins.

    Please forgive me and save me by your shed blood;

    come into my heart.

    I want to receive you as my own personal Lord and Savior.


  • Anonymous
    5 years ago

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  • 1 decade ago

    well, I guess the best place to start would be in the scriptural references to homosexuality.

    (Gen 19:4) It was one of the sins of Sodom

    Leviticus 18:22, 20:13

    Deut. 23:17

    Romans 1:27

    ok, so these are pretty clear in that homosexuality is a sin. And you are right, we all are sinners before God. We should love them and they should be able to do as they wish, I would never try to force them otherwise.

    The problem isnt with homosexuality or homosexuals. The problem is in them wanted their behavior to be condoned by all, and accepted as "normal". Its even more then that, it is in what it will do to our society. Once same-sex marriage is allowed it will forever change our society, and not for the better. It will be taught in our schools as normal, and it will start to effect the nuclear family for the worst. While there is not yet the data to show the effects of children being raised in same sex homes, there IS data to show that not having a mother/father in a childs life DOES cause damage. My husband installed beds for a short time and met a young boy (about 5) who had two mommies. He was so desperate for male companionship that he clung to my husband and his coworker for over an hour while they were in his home.

    As the prominent sociologist David Popenoe has said:

    The burden of social science evidence supports the idea that gender differentiated parenting is important for human development and that the contribution of fathers to childrearing is unique and irreplaceable. (David Popenoe, Life Without Father (New York: The Free Press, 1996) p. 146.)

    Popenoe explained that:

    . . . The complementarity of male and female parenting styles is striking and of enormous importance to a child’s overall development. It is sometimes said that fathers express more concern for the child’s longer-term development, while mothers focus on the child’s immediate well-being (which, of course, in its own way has everything to do with a child’s long-term well-being). What is clear is that children have dual needs that must be met: one for independence and the other for relatedness, one for challenge and the other for support.

    (Ibid., p. 145)

    In today’s secular world, the idea of tolerance has come to mean something entirely different. Instead of love, it has come to mean condone – acceptance of wrongful behavior as the price of friendship. Jesus taught that we love and care for one another without condoning transgression. But today’s politically palatable definition insists that unless one accepts the sin he does not tolerate the sinner.

    As Elder Dallin H. Oaks has explained,

    Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination.

    I have a hard time with the balnce between their right to live their life, and my right to protect my family, my children, and future generations of children. I will not make a peep about their choices in who they sleep with, but when asked my opinion (as on a ballot) I will certainly not condone the behavior or call it "normal".

    My hubby is studying to be a neuropsycologist and will have some good info for you so I will star this.

  • 1 decade ago

    Yes. Numerous Christian denominations accept gay marriage.

    Conservative Christians, who have very strict ideals on what is socially acceptable, tend to be Biblical Literalists. If "man shall not lie with man", then that's that. However, they don't seem to worry about wearing clothes with mixed fibers, or doing work on the Sabbath.

    Liberal Christians are less about imposing antiquated morality, and more about focusing on love, compassion, and tolerance. They figure God loves everyone, even if they're gay.

    Coincidentally, the latter group causes far fewer problems in society for the rest of us.

    You sound more like a liberal Christian. Good for you.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    No, you are not!

    There is a BIG problem in the U.S. with Christianity being confused with conservative Republicanism.

    The two are not mutually exclusive.

    In fact, there are not only Christians who believe that being gay is NOT a sin, but there are gay Christians.

    Also, research Greg Boyd. He's a pastor who has some great ideas about how the church should act on these issues and how we shouldn't label the Republican or Democratic way of voting the "Christian" way. (See "Myth of a Christian Nation" on YouTube.)

    Source(s): Jesus didn't get involved in politics.
  • 1 decade ago

    we have to study what the meaning of true (marriages) is and why God created male and female" gay marrige is acceptable to the this of world and the people that loves that in their mind regardles if not gay or lesbian some instigate it "The wickedness of Sodom and Gomorrah-where men were lovers of men instead of the natural attraction to the female-which caused their destruction, this world glorifying this abomination by using television, radio, and magazines to make a behavior that is unacceptable to God, acceptable to us basiclly that what pruduce that thought. To anyone, who is gay or lesbian, I don’t want you to think that we are denigrating you; all of us are sinners and we are no better than you. We are saying, however, that such conduct earned Sodom and Gomorrah the wrath of God, If God didnt create the woman "humanity will not be here, planets ,stars,etc U can comes as u are , but certain time cannot remain like that forever, even us not gay or not lesbian " if believe in the kingdom of God, we have to (grow) into perfection of Gods mind .We are not born into the Brain of God, we are born into the Mind of God. Mind is not brain and brain is not mind. Brain is a transmitter and a receiver. If it receives right, it will transmit right. What you see out here is not the Brain of God. You are born into God's Mind. Everything you see came out of His Mind, therefore, if you feed on His Mind you can grow into His Mind which means think rightly.

  • Kerry
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    You can be "accepting" of the person, but not condone the behavior. There is a distinction. The Bible is clear that sexual immorality to against God's laws, and that includes homosexuality.

    But again, you can separate the deeds from the deed doer. You should love, support, be compassionate with the person, but not agree with the behavior.

    Source(s): Lifelong Mormon
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