Eating Disorder. How do I fix it?

I think I may I have an eating disorder. I don't want to ask for help though. I used to weigh 16 stone when I was 17. I started making myself sick and got down to 10 stone. Then I started eating only 500 calories a day and I now weigh 8 stone. I am 5 ft 7, so i know I'm slightly underweight. If I eat more than... show more I think I may I have an eating disorder. I don't want to ask for help though. I used to weigh 16 stone when I was 17. I started making myself sick and got down to 10 stone. Then I started eating only 500 calories a day and I now weigh 8 stone.

I am 5 ft 7, so i know I'm slightly underweight. If I eat more than my set amount a day I get panicky and start sweating until I can go and be sick. It's like a vicious circle of staving for days then binging and being sick.

I don't need you to tell me about all the dangers because I know about them all..... the rotting teeth, bone problems, fertility problems, death etc.... luckily I don't have any of those yet. I do want to get it sorted but I can't go to the doctors. They're gonna look at me and say "you're 8 stone, your not underweight just try and eat healthier" I always said I'd stop once i got to 9 stone, then 8 stone and i never reach my goal and be happy cos I always want lower.

How can I control this on my own?
Update: To answer your questions. Firstly yes i know about the problems and why don't i just stop? well if it was that easy I wouldn't be asking. Also the way my mind is.... i know it sounds crazy but to me all my mind cares about is being thin.... whatever the cost. I just shut the problems out of my... show more To answer your questions. Firstly yes i know about the problems and why don't i just stop? well if it was that easy I wouldn't be asking. Also the way my mind is.... i know it sounds crazy but to me all my mind cares about is being thin.... whatever the cost. I just shut the problems out of my mind.

Secondly, It took me about 3 to 4 months to lose 5 stone and get down to 11 stone, then I lost another stone over a period of 12 month. I got down to 10 and then i found that being sick wasn't working any more so i started restricting. I would lose about 7 lbs in 5 days and then binge/ be sick over the weekend and put on 5 lbs, then loose another 7, etc.... so i was losing about 2lbs a week
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