What should i do my boyfriend told me he is happy but only sometimes?
Ok I been with my bf for 1 year and a half but I know him for 2 years now, he is younger then me by 2 years I’m 20 years old right now. There are times when we are both so happy but the truth most of the time we aren’t happy we are always getting into agreements over dumb little things, anything can get us both mad but he mainly gets mad at me because he clams that I’m always looking at other guys witch I don’t there’s no point for me to do that they just happen to be where I turn. And this past weekend we got into a agreement because of that then we talked it over but this time I feel that he is trying to stay away from me he hasn’t even called me this whole week I’m the one looking for him and its bugging me because I hate being the girl looking for a guy I think its wrong. Last night I called him I asked him what was wrong I asked if he was happy he said I am but only sometimes that really throw me off it hurts me so much because I love him he always tells me he loves me too he is so sweet with me awww….this has me so confuse What does this mean that he is only happy sometimes what do u guys think? Is it that we were spending time together a lot? I use to hang out with him every day after work he’ll sleep at my house or I’ll sleep at his but his problem is that he gets bored so fast he is not a type of guy that could just chill for one day he gets bored very easily . What should I do I talked to help I also asked him if there are things that he doesn’t like from me but he said its not me but he doesn’t know what it is he blames himself but I have a feeling its something else he has me thinking bad things like if I’m the one doing things wrong.
What should I do???
Please help me this hurts me so bad =(
- 1 decade agoFavorite Answer
If he's only happy sometimes, it's clear you need to find out when those other times happen and what the cause of them is. My bf and I sat down and had a big talk one day where we both just loaded out our grievances with each other and said exactly what makes us both unhappy... and after that he changed and started making a big effort to stop the things that hurt me. Things have improved greatly since.
"Only happy sometimes" sounds like a cry for help to me. He clearly cares for you because he's letting you know that YES, he IS happy sometimes.... but he wants you to know that he's not always, and he's hoping things will change, I think. I think that by not talking and being roundabout though you are both doing things wrong, not just you. Do not take on all the blame, and be humble--be open to suggestions on what you do that might bother him, but at the same time be willing to tell him how you feel too.
I know how you feel, and it can hurt a lot, but I know you can get through this! You've been together a long time and both sound mature! So have faith and you'll pull through. :)
- 1 decade ago
Im 21 and I've been with my bf for 2 years now! Its not easy and it hasn't been a relationship takes a lot if u want it to work. We use to fight over lil things to, we've had some very bad ones where he says he's gonna leave, but he never does. The point is if ur spendin a lot of time 2gether chill with that for a while. It took my bf workn in minnesota for a mth! I didn't see him and when he came back I was so relieved I was goin crazy those few weeks. But he said he missed me just as much! Try that. And it seems 2 me ur bfs a lil insecure if he says ur lookin at guys all the time. U no y he's feelin that way? U 2 need to sit down and tell eachothr wat u expect out of the relationship see if ur on the same page. He says he's happy sometimes he's probably not happy when u guys argue. So try not to argue so much if he says somethin that ticks u off just let it go that's wat I do I pretend I never heard it lol when u do get caught up in a fight don't say any hurtful things just walk away and cool off. Im getting the hang of it now and its working! After we talk about it rationally and next thing u know all is fine. So just take a breather from eachother space might do u 2 some good. There was so many times me and my bf wantwd 2 give up but we never did. If u think he's worth fightin 4 then u need to do everything in ur power to keep him. A year and a half is a long time to call it quits. these things happen but in time things will get better I promise! Good luck I hope everything works out for you!! Hope this helps!Source(s): My life and experiences!
- 1 decade ago
Well in a relationship your a bound to argue. But you should definitley be happy more than not. He sounds a little self conscious as well if he is always acusing you of staring at other guys. You might consider breaking it off it doesn't like your personalities really mash too well, and one last thing, its disagreements or arguements. you arnt getting into agreements. =p sry but it was bugging me lol i know.. i know... ocd XD good luck
- Anonymous1 decade ago
oh dear i have exactly your problem.i thought im the only girl have this problem.i think im always the girl looking for him exactly as you said.can you bielive? i understand every single word of what you described above.i hope i could help you but i really dont know what to do with this problem.but the only thing i can say is try to give him some space if you spend most of your time with him then he will be tired.most of the boys arent like this but its our bad luck that bfs are like this! i always ask him if i have done sth to make him angry but he says no why you think like this.he never wants to talk about it.on the other hand he says he loves me and i really dont know!!!!!!! im totally confused.sorry i couldnt help you but if you like we can talk more about it.good luckxxxx
- How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
- 1 decade ago
Talk to him about it. Say that you're not happy that he blames everything on you (maybe do it on the phone it would be easier, or through email). Say you'll give him a last chance, and if that doesn't work out, you dump him. Hope this helps babe!
- 1 decade ago
he's still a kid and probably does not want the same thing as you do...its not what your doing wrong ..its what he's doing wrong..so stop blaming yourself for his insecurities... if he's only happy sometimes,its probably when you give him sex...go find someone you can be with who's happy with you all the time...save yourself the heartache...
- 1 decade ago
he is only happy during sex