Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsWeddings · 1 decade ago

OMG you people are rude! im getting married tomorrow and 16 whats wrong with that?

Theres like noone that supports me besides my mom not my dad but my friends and my husbands family,friends.Okay we have been together since we were 13 i know no one will belive us but its true we had some breakups when we were 13 but since we were 14 we havent broken up. he was 14 when i met him then when i was 14 he was 15 15,he was 16 and im 16 and now hes 17! we think is a great idea for us.Our wedding is going to be hugee! its going to be in los angeles.we are accttualy from florida but we want it to be something to remember. And no WE DONT NEED NO THERAPY so u haterz need to stop saying my mother need therapy. Theres going to be a room outside where we are going to get married.Its mostly going to be pink with rosses.After that he said hes taking me to disney world when we come back from ca.Thats going to be our honeymoon.We are staying in a hotel we planned everything already.He promised me that when we get there hes going to be holding me.his car is going to say just married!!

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  • Dennis
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago
    Best Answer

    What are you people rich or something? All these plans n stuff like you just big ballin. And you can be mad all you want at our disagreement, but i'm pretty sure 5-10 years down the road..(lol if it lasts that long), suddenly you'll be RIGHT back on here saying "oh my god why do i feel this way, was it meant to be i was so in love at first and now we've grown apart" or " Did i waste my youth on just one love" or some other crazy mess because you decided that you wanted to marry early.

    If you SERIOUSLY think...that this is gonna workout....then you have to take into account what you SERIOUSLY have in this relationship. Through THICK AND THIN....that means when sh*t gets bad, no money, someone sick, babies, bills, living WITHOUT YOUR PARENTS...dealing with lil things that annoy the sh*t out of you that he WILL DO regardless of what you think, because everyone is different. Even smack down to the sex, temptation...and oh the big finale.....LONG DISTANCE/COLLEGE....cause if you guys plan on goin to college ho ho boy is that a life changer.

    If you can safely say and confidently know you can maturely handle all that was just said in that paragraph....then sure...nothin wrong with that..you've 'seemingly' matured for your youthful age....maybe you have more sense than the idiots that divorce 27 times, or cheat, or get married cause it was 'cool' and then go through all this drama cause they were never REALLY ready in the first place.

    MAYBE you might be like our grandfathers or great grandfathers, or the folks who've married really young but because they focused on 'teamwork' and REAL love, not a convenient love/lust relationships that's fun, they get to have these 50 year + marriages. My grandfather was 18..my grandmother was 15 when he proposed and married her....they were soulmates until they passed. But that was back then...people valued tradition and hard work much more than now.

    SO.....if you think you're ready....fine...have at it...but don't get pissed when the consequences of love, responsibility, and marriage whoop yo *ss...cause it will, it'll be rewarding when you got love, but it will be a b*tch if you weren't ready to take on the BIG RESPONSIBILITY. If it works, then i applaud you, you'll be one of the rare few that exist in this generation. And if it doesn't work out...well....we told you so.

  • 1 decade ago

    The only thing I can say is good luck to you kid. Cause your gonna need it. Being married is a huge responsibility. And I agree with some of the posters on here, you shouldn't be getting married so young.

    Edit: I was married the first time at the age of 18.. that union lasted less then 4 years, because I married the first serious boyfriend I had. I would NEVER let my kids get married when they were 16. And I agree with the posters on here again, your mom needs to have her head examined for permitting her LITTLE GIRL to get married at the age of 16. I know you don't like being called a LITTLE girl, but that's what you are. Don't get married tomorrow. Just call off the wedding, and stay in school.

  • 1 decade ago

    Well, let's see here, when I was 16, I had been with my fiance for a year! We're now 20 and know that we're too young to get married right now, but not too young to plan our wedding! Marriage is a beautiful thing that people take lightly now. Divorce is so common that my mom actually told me I'll be divorced in 5 years! People no longer have faith in marriage, and getting married that young, while it might work, you are legally not able to make your decisions yet! Heck, we thought about getting married at 18 and after we discussed it we knew we weren't ready! If you guys are really ready to gt married, then waiting until you are 20 is not going to hurt. Trust me. I've been waiting a long time to marry my fiance, and I love our relationship! We have it all!

    I think you are too young to get married, but I wouldn't even say you'd be ready at 20 from this post. When you can hold your own and take criticism as it is meant to be, helpful, then you will be ready for marriage...

    And what was your question anyway?

  • 1 decade ago

    Getting married at 16 is not very smart. Been together for 3 years? That's not long at all, especially since it's only been two years since you got back together. At 16 and 17, there's no way you can earn money enough for a family. You have to get a house/apartment, pay for food, gas, taxes, etc. At 17, you can work a maximum of 20 hours a week during the school year. Do you think your husband can support you on a part-time job while going through high school? Or do you want him to drop out and get a full-time job so he can pay for you? As a high school dropout, he would have almost no chance at any decent-paying job. Go through college first, so that you or he can get a well-paying job so that you don't go bankrupt the first year you're married.

    Have you ever tried living together? I'm guessing you see each other in school, go over each other's houses, but have you ever lived with him for an extended period of time?

    Also, as newlyweds, you're probably going to be having sex. If you become pregnant, you'll have to have an abortion or drop out of school. If your husband already dropped out to get a job, and you drop out to take care of the baby, neither of you gets a full high school education, meaning neither of you can get any good jobs, which means you'll live on minimum wage. Is that really what you want? If it is, go ahead and get married. If not, wait until your husband (and/or you) has a stable, fairly well-paying job and you've both graduated at least high school, if not college.

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  • Woods
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    What's wrong with it? (and please pay careful attention to what rubybenubi -- below --- wrote because she's absolutely correct)

    If there was enough space to explain, you wouldn't have time to read it all. YOU'RE TOO YOUNG!!! Both of you. THAT's the main reason!!!!!!!!! As mature as you think you are, you don't even have a clue. Just because you love someone and want to spend your life together doesn't mean you are ready for the responsibilities of marriage.

    Nobody hates you, at least not me. I wish I could protect you from what you're doing. I have a 20 year old daughter who isn't "old enough" too get married right now. If she wanted to, she has no way to make a good living because she hasn't finished her education. I don't want her to be poor all of her life because she can't get a good paying job without an education. And that's what I see in your future, which scares me to death for you.

    Right now, you have a chance to finish school, go to college or trade school, get a good job and start out on the right foot. If you get married and start having children, they will become your responsibility and getting an education will have to take a back seat. And husbands are demanding. They don't normally like to share your time while you are at school and they are stuck at home with the kids. It's just not the best solution.

    Nothing you said about your wedding is significant. I'm glad you have a hotel, honeymoon, pink flowers, etc. But that'll last one day or week. What then????? That's why we don't think you're old enough. You aren't looking at the future. You're looking at the wedding and honeymoon.

    PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE grow up first. And you can't be grown at 16. It's just not possible.

    Hate me if you want. Makes me no difference. I finished college before I got married and have always been thankful I did. Wish you would too! I'm just trying to explain that you will reap the results of your actions. And the actions you're taking will have consequences that will last forever. Guess that's the main thing that I would tell you if you were sitting in the room with me.

  • Leia
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    From age 16 to age 18 you will become a more mature person, and a different person. I'll hold my breath that you two will still be together.

    From age 18 to 25 you will REALLY transform into a different person and at this point, if you are still with your husband, you will be starting to think of all the things you missed out on from becoming such a young bride.

    From age 25 to age 30, you will most likely be divorced.

    Listen to me -- you have SO much growing up to do and SO much to experience in life. Do this as a couple, but don't get MARRIED. Wait. See if you're still together in a few years and THEN make that decision.

    I am 32 years old right now. I look back at being 16 and thought I knew EVERYTHING. I didn't.

    And you certainly don't.

    Print ALL these answers out you got....stash them somewhere and look at them in 10 years. You'll be surprised at how right some of us are.

  • 1 decade ago

    When I was in highschool one of my girlfriends decided to get married - She was 18 at the time and had been with her boyfriend since she was 14 - and I will tell her what i told you. There is no big rush to get married, you have your entire life for that. Why not just stay a happy couple and get married in the future if you still want it then. A few years after she was married you know what she said to me? She said, "I should have listened to you".

    Good thing he's taking you to Disneyworld because they tend to frown upon unattended children running around the park.

    And after Disneywrold and the honeymoon etc, where are two 16 year olds going to live? I can't imagine either of you has a job that earns you enough money for shelter, food, bills, and all the other expenses that come with being on your own. Have you two even thought about that?

    Good luck, you are going to need it.

  • yo-yo
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    "Okay we have been together since we were 13 i know no one will belive us but its true we had some breakups when we were 13 but since we were 14 we havent broken up. he was 14 when i met him then when i was 14 he was 15 15,he was 16 and im 16 and now hes 17!"

    Congratulations... you know how to do math... lets play a game... it's called let's pay bills!!

    Rent $600

    Light Bill $200 (summer time)

    Phone + Internet $70

    Cellphone $100

    Water $30

    Total $1000

    Do you have enough money... oh no wait... you gatta eat right, you need a car right.. the car needs insurance, oh check out the gas prices...and your still in school so you gatta do your science project, you gatta see your friends and like totally like no way go to like you know the mall!

    Oh wait your mommy is paying for this, your mommy eventually is ganna get old and die, no offence but that's life! So stop thinking about getting married finish school get a degree and get a career and then get married!!

    ~yoyo

  • KitKat
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    Your parents must be super rich.

    Well, if I knew you in person I wouldn't talk to you because you are a spoiled person who gets everything they want from their parents and never has to work a day in their life. After all, how can you afford California, a wedding and disney all at 16??? I'm almost 19 and I make pretty damn good money and my oldest sister's wedding is soon and she is spending boatloads. Weddings cost around 20k. You have 20k, plus money to buy a house and support each other, plus money for disney???? You are a spoiled brat for getting your parents to pay for everything. I paid for everything except my dinner food and housing since I was 13.

    fyi, My bf and I went to Florida for Spring Training and we had a HARD time finding a hotel to stay at. He was 20 at the time and I was 18. Most hotels you need to have a person present who is 21 or older. We only got that one because it was literally the only hotel that would let us stay at 18+ and not 21+.

    I don't have a problem with getting married at 18 or anything, but anything younger is crazy. Do you really have a house and a good job and are able to support each other if something happens??? From your paragraph it sounds like you AREN'T ready for marriage.

    But oh well. I'm sure no one will stop you. Just don't come crying back on Yahoo Answers asking everyone why you are divorced at 17. Weddings are a lot of drama and work. Do you really have the time in between recess and nap time???

    Your parents can't pay for everything for you your entire life. And if they do, I actually feel sorry for you because you are a pathethic spoiled brat and no one wants to be with a person like that.

    Source(s): Myself. I was dating my best friend of 4 years, for a total of almost 2 years. We had plans of getting married. He was 18 and I was 16. He said he was going to propose on Graduation. Well we broke up just before then because he changed and long story. But the thing is, we were going to get married, but he changed right before school ended and we broke up. One of my good friends were engaged to a guy at 15 or 16. Next year at school they broke up and he was engaged to her best friend. At the end of school they broke up. I think now he is single.
  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I had a friend like you. She came from a problem family, though. She was going to get married and she figured her life would be nothing but rainbows and skittles!

    She married into a family that was a million times worst than hers! Her life went from bad to extremely, horribly worst in no time at all. She and her husband didn't even act like a married couple for 10 years. They dated who they wanted and acted more like roommates. She had to take on his familiy's problems, naturally because she lived with them. If you can wait, I'd highly suggest it until you both finish high school, when you can afford a place of your own...

    Ten years into their marriage they had a daughter, I honestly believe she's what saved their marriage.

    Wait, are you marrying because you're pregnant???

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