宜臻 asked in 社會與文化語言 · 1 decade ago

英文文章的修改,贈20點喔!

以下是老師這次分派的英文作業,是以「辯論文」的文體來比較living in the city or in the country,

第一段是introduction

第二段是supporting1

第三段是supporting2

第四段是rebuttal

第五段是conclusion

我覺得我寫的非常爛~~

有許多地方需要修改.......

還麻煩各位大大~~~

如果有更好的point,

還請您不吝修改~~

中文的部份實在因為寫到很煩~~

所以懶的再翻譯了~~

請各位大大幫個忙喔!

謝謝!

贈送20點喔!

Living in the City or in the Country?

In the recent years, living in the city or in the country is a popular topic of conversation. On earth, what kind of environment is suitable place for people? The best environment should include the convenience of food, clothing, housing, traffic and amusement. Living in the city is not only convenience in food, clothing, traffic and amusement but also has more opportunities of success.

Update:

第二段:First, urban life has more convenience than country life. In a big city, the public transport is very integrity. You can go sort of places by bus, expressage, subways.

Update 2:

Besides, it is convenience to find many public places of entertainment, like parks, museum, exhibitions and so forth.

Update 3:

In addition, the stores are standing in great numbers, such as department store, grocery store, drugstore, supermarket, restaurant, clothing store and so on. You can easy busying any kinds of objects that you want in the same shopping street.

Update 4:

第三段:

Update 5:

Second, living in the city has more opportunities of success. Ever since the first towns were built, more and more people gathered in the towns. Where there are crowds, there is business.

Update 6:

All kinds of building are distributed everywhere in a big city, characterized by better economic condition and prosperity of trade. As a result, cities offer many opportunities of jobs. People can easy to earn lots of money.

Update 7:

第四段:

Update 8:

Opponents of the residents who are living in the country consider that living in the city is not easily because the price of commodity in the city is too high.

Update 9:

However, if you compare the price of goods in city and country, you will discover that many goods which are sold in city and country there price are the same.

Update 10:

For example, the goods in 7-11 all be sold the same price which respect to where is the 7-11. Besides, there are lots of the same kinds of stores in the city, 彼此間的競爭較多,也比較不會亂哄抬商品的價格。Therefore, 在都市賣的東西不一定會比鄉下還要貴。

Update 11:

第五段:

Update 12:

To sum up, there are many benefits to live in the city for people. Living in the city not only convenient for food, clothing, traffic and amusement, but also have many opportunities for success. So, if you are worried about where to live, urban life would be your best choice.

Update 13:

以上是全部的文章內容~~

真的很抱歉~~

每次都說我的字數超過限制~~

所以我只能分段po上來~~~

請問哪位大大有比較好的方法可以讓整篇文章po上來的呢?

Update 14:

謝謝天旋大大的翻譯,您翻譯的很好~~~

但是很抱歉~~~

這篇文章是我寫的~~~

我是希望有人可以針對文法、句型之類的~~

幫我修改~~

而不是翻譯喔!

不過還是謝謝您!辛苦啦!

3 Answers

Rating
  • Elisa
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Hi,

    These are my corrections to your paper for better English usage and grammar errors.

    What type of environment is suitable for people?

    The best environment should provide easy access to food, clothing, housing, traffic and amusement.

    Living in the city not only provides you easy access to the above mentioned, but also creates more opportunities for you to succeed. (I did not spell out all the things you mentioned earlier to avoid duplication)

    Firstly, urban life offers more convenience than country life, providing a more integrated public transportation system including buses and rapid transits.

    Besides, places for entertainment, such as parks, museums, exhibitions and so forth, are within easy reach. You can also find numerous stores such as department stores, grocery stores, drugstores, supermarkets, restaurants, clothing stores and etc. What’s more convenient is the ability to buy anything in one shopping district.

    Secondly, the opportunity of success is greater living in the city. People flooded into cities ever since the first one was built. Big cities are populated with buildings signaling the economic prosperity and greater job opportunities. Hence, people are more likely to earn more money.

    On the contrary, residents in rural areas consider city life as difficult for the high cost of living. However, if you compare the price of goods in a city and in a country, you will discover that prices are the same in either city.

    For example, the goods in 7-11 are priced the same no matter where they are sold. Moreover, abundant stores with similar product lines in the cities help to stabilize the price of goods due to competition. Therefore, goods sold in the cities are not necessarily more expensive than those in rural areas.

    2008-05-26 23:45:10 補充:

    To sum up, there are many benefits living in the city, including the convenience of life and the many opportunities to succeed. So, if you are worried about where to live, urban life would be your best choice.

    2008-05-30 00:34:28 補充:

    Just send me an email and/or the link to the question when you have the paper ready for correction.

    Source(s): Myself. Went abroad at age 11. With 32 years experience speaking and writing English. Tutored English as an Undergrad. A project manager in the US since 1992., Myself. Went abroad at age 11. With 32 years experience speaking and writing English. Tutored English as an Undergrad. A project manager in the US since 1992., Myself. Went abroad at age 11. With 32 years experience speaking and writing English. Tutored English as an Undergrad. A project manager in the US since 1992.
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  • 1 decade ago

    Thank you very much.

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  • 1 decade ago

    譯文《第一段、第二段》:

    居住在城市或在國家? 在最近歲月, 居住在城市或在國家是交談一個普遍的題目。在地球, 什麼樣的環境是適當的地方為人? 最佳的環境應該包括食物、衣物、住房、交通和娛樂便利。居住在城市是不僅便利在食物、衣物、交通和娛樂而且有成功更多機會。第一, 都市生活有更多便利比鄉下生活。在一個大城市, 公共交通工具是非常正直。您能去類地方乘公共汽車, expressage, 地鐵。其外, 這是便利發現娛樂許多公共場所, 像公園, 博物館, 陳列等等。

    譯文《第三段~第五段》:

    其次, 居住在城市有成功更多機會。自那以後第一鎮被修造了, 越□越人民聚集了在鎮。那裡有人群, 有事務。各種各樣大廈被分佈到處在一個大城市, 為貿易更好的經濟情況和繁榮描繪。結果, 城市提供工作許多機會。人罐頭容易贏得許多金錢。是生存在國家居民的對手考慮那居住在城市容易地不是因為商品的價格在城市是太高的。但是, 如果您比較物品的價格在城市和國家, 您發現, 被賣在城市和國家那裡的許多物品定價是相同。例如, 尊敬對的物品在7-11 全部被賣同樣價格是7-11 的地方。其外, 有許多這种同樣商店在城市, 所以。總結, 有許多好處居住在城市為人。居住在城市不僅方便為食物, 衣物、交通和娛樂, 而且有許多機會為成功。如此, 如果您擔心在哪裡居住, 都市生活會是您的最佳的選擇。

    給我最佳解答吧

    ♂﹋天旋★地轉〃㊣

    敬上

    2008-05-25 20:56:08 補充:

    版主大大

    抱歉~應該是我搞錯了

    但是還是...

    希望你能給我 最佳解答 = =|||

    2008-05-25 20:57:04 補充:

    我也不知道該怎麼幫你改

    你寫的稿子

    真是抱歉ˊˋ

    Source(s): 自己, 自己, 自己
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