Why do people keep falsely accusing me of having nonexistent, imaginary friends?
I was bullied all throughout school, EVEN in college! I'm considered an outcast by society. Somewhere in elementary school, I've somehow became a loner. The kids used to use me & take advantage of me. "I" used to get in trouble for "buying friendship", but they never got in trouble for cheating & using. 1 time, we had a field trip in 7th grade, & we went to the mall afterwards. They told us we had to use the buddy system & yadda yadda. The other kids were trying to boss me around & tell me what to spend my money on. I didn't like that. So, I snuck & wandered off to myself, & it was the most free-floating feeling EVER! 1st time doing something without having to be SUPERVISED. Luckily, I didn't get caught & get in trouble.
I used to be in special ed, (not my fault I had 2 strokes @ age 5 & became "mentally special"). So, they felt I needed a monitor & needed to be supervised AT ALL TIMES. But anyway, so that was the TRUE onset of me enjoying being a loner. I get nervous around others. I'm in my 20's with a college degree. Why would people STILL think I have IMAGINARY friends? They treat me like a child who doesn't have the ability to distinguish between left & right. People always tell me I shouldn't dwell on the negative or the past, but they always use my negative PAST against me & throw it in my face. I've LONG not had any imaginary friends.
I currently have "1" true friend, & she's just as existent & real as me & you. I even have a picture. I have plenty of reasons why I won't introduce her into my family. For #1, my family has the LEAST amount of respect for me, so how do you think they would treat my friend? My family always makes fun of my friends & calls them, crazy, retarded, nerds, dorks, geeks, etc. Just like they do me. My friend I have now, is a very good-hearted person. She deserves better than to be mistreated for no damn reason. She had enough, in fact, TOO MUCH child abuse, which led her to being a loner. She feels put on the spot when being introduced to others. She's a very private person, & we're all "entitled" to our right to privacy. She's very shy, & she doesn't talk much. Same with me. Being abused too much led me to becoming a loner, eventually. Yes, I isolate myself from everyone FOR A REASON.
With people abusing, misusing, & taking advantage of me, I STILL experience that. I'm a grown woman who gets treated like a child. No one trusts me AT ALL. They don't because they don't understand me. I'm not a bad person. I suffer OCD, Tourette's, anxiety, & depression. Because I don't fit in the crowd, I get treated unfairly. People are afraid of what they don't understand, & they figure they don't "have time" to even TRY to understand my situation. Yes, I have odd behaviors, like twitching, outbursts, cleaning too much, doing things repeatedly, worrying too much, etc. They think I'm vulnerable. When people misuse me, someone else tells me to just simply stay away from the abuser. Family or not. Everywhere I go, people ABUSE me or make fun of me. So, I just said, "**** it! I'm gonna avoid EVERYONE & just stay to myself.
Isn't it confusing when people, including professionals, tell me, "You need to stay away from this person & that person. If you keep going around them, then you put yourself in the position to DESERVE to be abused, & you keep putting your hand back in the fire, & you LIKE being abused.", etc.? Then, they also tell me, I can't stay isolated to myself all the time, & I need to go out & meet people, etc. But @ the same time, they tell me, "Don't talk to strangers." I have a college degree. I don't NEED nobody to tell me that! & then, they get upset & call me stubborn & hard-headed for not listening to them. If people keep giving you mixed messages, aren't you gonna eventually get tired of what THEY say & do what's best for YOU?
So, with my friend, I showed a picture, & my family says it's not enough proof that she's "real". They always try to test & challenge me by asking, "What's her SS#? Where does she live? What's her phone#? Let me meet her." etc. That's DEEP private info! I'm telling you. She's the ONLY friend I have to depend on for emotional support. Other than that, I have NOBODY. & people make like I don't deserve friends, so they want to believe I'm making stuff up. They say I'm crazy & that they don't believe a word I say, but I don't owe them an answer for my life decisions, anyway.
People think I'm living in a fantasy world because me & my friend never fuss or fight, & I never have any complaints about her. Well, OK. I know PLENTY of others who get along well with people-friend, family, coworkers, classmates, etc. People think that in the REAL world, NO one is gonna be nice to you. They feel that EVERYONE should treat me mean, & like I'm the scum of the earth. They said, "Ain't NO damn way in the world somebody's gonna be THAT nice to you!"
Also, another reason why I'm afraid to introduce her to my family is because I'm afraid they're gonna brainwash her with poisonous false rumors, to make like I'm a sick & twisted child molester, a murderer, etc. They turned other family members away from me. I was a foster kid, & I have a twin.
My TWIN even hates me! She's the #1 person making all these allegations, & people are believing it. She lied on me, saying I molested her kids & tried to murder them, etc. But I found out that it was HER misusing her OWN kids, being mad @ her husband, & flipping it on me, so she can destroy my future career. She was the 1 who STARTED the "imaginary friend" rumor. After I turned 18 & met my BIOLOGICAL family, they were already told the false rumors before I can even meet them. She met them @ 17 & kept it discreet because with the courts, we weren't supposed to even have any contact with our birth family. They abused us THAT bad!
When I was a newborn, my schizophrenic mom put me in the drawer, & when I cried, she'd shut it, & she goes around bragging about it, almost 25 yrs. later. So, I was BORN into this world unappreciated. I didn't ******' ask to be here! That's why we had to be put in foster care for 18 yrs. Luckily, we stayed with the same family, but how I see it. They were so abusive that the court may as well should've let our OWN mom take care of us her DAMN self! Either family, I-not my twin-was abused to the point where I was at risk of being murdered in either family. I STILL receive family abuse-to this DAY! They're all hatin' on me because I'm the youngest & ONLY 1 with a college degree. Now, I thank my foster mom for keeping me career-oriented & encouraging me to go to college, even though she used to tell me I'm not college material. Showed HER ***!
So, I thought I had a GREAT relationship with the counselor I have. Now, SHE'S questioning whether my friend is real or not. Showing her a photo wasn't satisfactory, either. I'm upset because I don't know if that's what she's REALLY trying to do. If she feels that way about me, then I'll feel scammed, jinxed, etc. like I wasted my valuable time, energy, & money, going to her. I've ran into counselors & social workers, etc. who are nice to you for a good 6 mos. & eventually turn against you. I've trusted this lady for 10 months now. Ever since March, this lady has been slowly but surely become fake.
My friend says that she doesn't feel comfortable with meeting my counselor or anyone I know, because she said that if they have to question her existence, then it's not worth it to meet them. My friend said if it's gotta be like that, she can smell trouble, & as always, find another reason to hate you.
So, bottom line. My friend basically doesn't want to meet anyone who "I" know who questions her existence. She said it's strange that someone would feel that they need to know her SOCIAL SECURITY # to show she's real. Hell, "I" don't even know her SS#, & I don't WANNA know it! So, do you think my friend has every right to feel & react this way? & do you think I also have every right to be pissed?...[