Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 1 decade ago

Honest Answers. How do you feel about open marriages?

I don't want to offend anyone and I don't want anyone criticizing me. I just want to see how you feel.. everyone is entitled to their opinions.

I've been happily married to the love of my life for 4 years going on 5. We're youthful, love being active & have a very healthy sexual appetite. The way we're different from most couples isn't so common but it happens.. I have had sex with other men during the course of our marriage and my husband completely understands. A lot of people don't agree at all with this but I feel like sometimes I need to have sex with someone other than my hubby. I'm completely happy at home.. completely.. no lies, I just need change every now and then. I'm not getting emotionally attached, I'm not falling in love.. I'm just having casual sex. Although my husband doesn't do this.. he doesn't mind if I go out for a night with another man & if he were to do it, I would be fine with it. What are your feelings?

Update:

Yes.. I understand about STDs. I would never put my husbands health at risk nor my own. I'm extra careful when I'm with others & take good care of myself.

40 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Best Answer

    What if you where in front of GOD,and you ask him that question.What do you think he would say to you.You both are playing around with your health and soul. May GOD be with the both of you.

  • 1 decade ago

    I think that if you and your husband are comfortable with it and he understands that your sexual appetite needs more than one man to satisfy it, then that is great. It means you have such a strong bond and connection, and obvious communication skills. As long as you are sure that he is alright with it and there is not any hidden jealousy or hurt from not being enough for you. I have one question though, do you stick to the same few men or is it always a different man? The reason I ask is because if it is always the same few the chances that there will be an emotional attachment will increase, but if it is truly casual sex with acquaintances....girl have fun! I admire couples that are strong enough and trust enough to have open marriages and relationships. I know it would devastate mine, though we both have talked about threesomes with another woman. Don't listen to the negativity that other people will throw at you, in the end it is your happiness and you shouldn't care what other people think. Have fun!

  • 1 decade ago

    This open marriage aka swingers is more common than most people think. There are several swingers in this country. There are things that everyone does in their relationship that others may not approve of. The main thing is talking with you husband and making sure that you both agree on everything that happens. If this works for you, then that's great!!! Just make sure that you protect yourself and husband when you go see these other men.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    To each his own. Whatever works for you, it wouldn't work for me. While I believe you are truly happy at home, there may come a time during your marriage where things aren't great for whatever reason. Hey, it DOES happen to most. Having an open marriage during this time could completely dissolve things with you and your husband. Your husband may change his mind about you being with others, or you may find yourself falling for someone else. I think you are playing with a loaded gun...just a matter of time. Good Luck.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I see nothing wrong with it. I am married and my wife has done this before. Before I met her I was with quite a few different women. I was her first. I was actually the one that suggested it to her, and she has since done this 3 times. It totally spices up our sex life and I'm pretty damn sure that she ain't gonna end up leaving me for some other guy. We've been together for about 15 years now. So I say do whatever makes you happy. But if he ever becomes uncomfortable with it then you should probably stop for the sake of your marriage.

  • 1 decade ago

    I have no problem with other people doing it what so ever. What ever makes you happy.

    Me personally wouldnt do it though. Just because I would want the guy im with to be with me and only me. I dont get why do it with other people if its just sex. Not to mention all the STD's out there these days. I just feel like its pointless and when its done and overwith I would feel like it was so not worth it just to get off real quick.

    But again, if other people do it thats cool. Just as long as both people TRULEY dont mind. Which is a hard thing to find these days.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Open marriages, statistically, do not last. Sex should be about love and a deep personal bond. You need to ask yourself, "What's so different about having sex with other men?" other than it's shallow and meaningless, and EXTREMELY risky. 80% of people 18-25 have HPV, and 98% of cervical cancers are caused by HPV. Is "casual" sex really worth the risk?

    If you want variety, get a vibrator.

    Source(s): Human Sexuality college course, personal experience.
  • 1 decade ago

    You should just have sex with your husband for there is so many things that could happen You could get something that you could not get rid of. A man might decide that if he can't have you when he want to no one can. I only want to say to be careful with who you choose for this extra sex you are having.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    yes reguardless if ur hubby is ok with this it makes u a s***,this is my opinion. you married ur husband and promised your self to him and now ur out sleeping around,i think this is disgusting,and yes this is because u r unhappy in some part of your life,and because its all about sex then your husband isnt doint it right or the saying is true,the one that says u cant turn a hoe into a housewife. i know this is harsh but this is my opinion. you are disrespecting your husband GOD and the law,you are cheating,commiting adultery. grow up and close your legs,when you get married that means only one person should be between your legs. you have to face god with this and when he asks why were u unfaithful,are u really going to say oh u know cuz i was horny?? wow,i am married and dont want anyone but my husband.period.thats how marriage is,what if u got prego or caught a disease and gave it to ur hubby?? how would u feel?

    Source(s): sorry i just strongly disagree
  • 3 years ago

    as long as you're completely look after on your courting, at the instant are not jealous, then all is effective...as long as each and every person is contained in a similar room. 3 strategies artwork out merely effective if all in room are comfortable, take exhilaration in the exciting, etc. The trick is to locate others that are passable to the two. And, somebody ought to be the dominant contained in the room, in any different case, there will be plenty buzzing and hawing as to what to do to whom. i don't advise long winded talks earlier hand, save it to intercourse, be aggressive from the time the third walks in. you at the instant are not development existence-long friendships right here, you're in it for intercourse, so save it on that airplane. in case you spend too plenty time speaking earlier something happens, there's a stable threat that some thing is going to flow incorrect. After each and every person is done with the intercourse, there is not something incorrect with sitting around and speaking, wine, etc....yet i'm not a stable believer in attending to be responsive to something regarding the third earlier the activities. in case you open it as much as couples, then you certainly will locate pairing off, so change pairings alongside the way as a results of fact the night proceeds. keep in mind that the third and/or 4th will want one in each and every of you to the different, and vice versa...that's standard in all of this. Be arranged to chortle plenty, not get self judgment of right and incorrect, and merely have exciting. there is little if any room for thoughts in those issues. If issues flow properly, you may invite the third/4th back, yet shrink it to no extra effective than 3 or 4 circumstances...in any different case, thoughts will develop with somebody contained in the room...AND, while you're making friends right here, that's probable suited to not have intercourse with them back....for some reason, intercourse and friends do not seem to flow properly mutually. good success, and the cardinal rule is...NO JEALOUSY ALLOWED...you began the sport, you may not grow to be an insecure monster contained in the midsection of it, or after it...era.

  • 1 decade ago

    If you truly love your husband how can you have sex with other men? I don't understand how you can love someone yet have sex with other people. Why do you feel like you need to have sex with other people? If you are happy why have sex with other men? Why get married in the first place? People have their own opinions, but I don't agree with it. It's your life and you can do what you want, but I don't understand. If your really in love and happy why the need to have sex with others? I don't think I would allow my boyfriend to have sex with other women. That would hurt me. I may be sounding selfish, but I want my boyfriend to be just for me and no one else. I don't like the thought of him touching other women or having sex with them because then I would feel like he doesn't love me any more. I would feel worthless and not good enough for him and I don't satisfy him. But if you both are ok with it then do what you want.

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