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Anonymous asked in Pregnancy & ParentingPregnancy · 1 decade ago

Boyfriend will not help me out 32 weeks pregnant and sick?

One I am 32 weeks pregnant as of tday and it's getting harder and harder to do simple things like go to the store without feeling like Ive been hit by a truck. today I am very flu-like with all symptoms stiff neck sore throat leg pains weak dizzy ear aches etc but just no fever. I was going 2 make 2night for my boyfriend and I but I feel a little bit too weak to do it now---wash the dishes, then cut the meat mash the potatoes etc it just seems so exhausting I'm afraid I'll pass out. I asked my boyfriend if he could do it and he says no. He says he's too tired from work. i know I dont work as many hours as he does but he doesnt have to take care of a growing person constantly inside his body. Being pregnant in itself is becoming a full-time job to me, I feel so depleted. I take my prenatals and everything and still i feel this way. I know this sounds illy but I'm worried I'll die in the next 8 weeks from feeling so weak and depleted of my nutrients. Why cant people see I need help now?

Update:

also I have explained this to him and he just says I'm whining. trust me I'm serious!

and my mom cant come over and help me, ton get help i ahve to come to her and I dont want 2 drive right now! Plus I feel so sick and flu-like.

I just wish I had a boyfriend who would go out of his way once in a blue moon to help me. Like maybe pick me up something at a restaurant or even fat food so i dont ahve 2 get it myself but he wont. It makes me angry bc I would do this for him or anybody else.

Update 2:

and I have already!

13 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Okay, please don't take this the wrong way, but I think you may have created a "Girl Who Cried Wolf" situation for yourself.

    You post here almost daily, and your posts are usually complaints about people not pampering you enough during your pregnancy, feeling jealous of all the attention celebrity pregnancies get, people not making enough of a fuss over you, you being jealous of the attention being paid to your brother and sister in-law's new baby (because you feel like nobody is paying any attention to you), worrying about people not wanting to come to your baby shower, feeling like your family and your boyfriend aren't as excited about your pregnancy as they are supposed to be, feeling like people aren't treating you as "fragilely" as they should because you are pregnant, and feeling hurt because your boyfriend/mother/friends/whoever are accusing you of whining all the time and trying to milk your pregnancy for the attention.

    So maybe it's time to take a step back and really think about what's going on. Maybe you HAVE really been complaining to everybody too much, and they are sick of hearing it. And now that you are really starting to feel tired toward the end of your pregnancy and could really use some extra help, nobody is offering, because they just think "Same S***, Different Day."

    I understand, as do most of the mothers here, what it's like to feel lousy during pregnancy. But nobody likes a complainer. There is nothing wrong with lying and saying "I feel fine" when someone asks "How are you?" when you're feeling horrible. Perhaps your family and your boyfriend are just worn out from hearing constant complaints, and as such, they won't be likely to respond sympathetically when you are feeling REALLY terrible and could use their help and support, even if it's just making dinner once in a while.

    Just a thought.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I know what you are going through.. I have an insensitive husband just like this... Another reason why all men should have to be pregnant for 1 month of their lives as a requirement for being a father = )... I'd say.. call and order some delivery.. enough for yourself.. and next time you go out to the store get you some healthy easy to make food.. microwave stuff etc... and don't worry about him.. let him get his own dinner.. What you are feeling physically is normal.. and I am feeling just as bad... even walking from the parking lot into the grocery store does me in... and all I hear about is how tired or hungry my husband is... men.. I tell you.. they could never do what we do... Feel free to email or im me anytime.. I am always online when the hubby is at work.. and would love to keep in contact with you.. Best wishes and congratulations on your pregnancy.. Try not to stress too much,,, it will just make things worse... = )

    Source(s): Mother of 4 boys, currently 24 weeks pregnant with TWINS!
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  • I don't mean to sound mean at all, but if he's like this now its only going to be worse when the baby is screaming every night,every 2 hrs. I'd get into some counseling asap, or start talking to your friends and family and get a support system ready for your recovery. It is physically impossible for you to do everything immediately after baby. So if he doesn't start doing better I would very seriously consider staying with a family member or friend for a few weeks up to a month after having the baby so that you have some help. And I'd tell him flat out if this is how he's going to treat you now, then you don't see why your even with him. I'm sorry to say it but i really don't see this working out if he's just that inconsiderate. I wish the best for you and the baby, and maybe he's just showing his *** at the moment and will step it up. I'd still get some support ready either way because your gonna need it Hun.

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  • K P
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    Do inform your doctor, but do not get too worried. I actually had morning sickness until my son was two days old, and then still had certain smells that would make me sick for 6 more months - pizza, etc. Your body will do everything to help the baby grow at this point. Unfortunately this means your health will suffer. I suffered "morning" sickness so badly that I was unable to get up off the floor at one point for 15 hours - I was alone with no one to help. I gained only 3 pounds througout the pregnancy. I was still able to wear my jeans - just left the button undone - the day my son was born. I was terrified he would not be healthy. He was over 10 pounds when he was born. My doctor reassured me my body would take care of baby first, and he was right. My son is now 16 and 6'4". Try and get as much rest as you can. Delivery can be very hard and you will need as much strength as you can get. Best of luck to you both.

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  • 1 decade ago

    A lot of men (especially immature ones) do not realize how physically taxing being pregnant is. Just existing in a pregnant state is more tiring than a full day of work for a non-pregnant person.

    You may need to discuss this with him. Insist you read some pregnancy books together or talk together with your OBGYN to help him better understand what you're going through.

    He may not even realize how much of a jerk he's being.

    If he refuses to listen to you and expects your pregnancy to be your problem, I don't know what to say. It sounds like you chose the wrong guy to have a child with. :( :( :(

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  • 1 decade ago

    I'm sorry to hear that. Thats not right for your boyfriend to be acting like that with you. does he go to any of your doctors appointments? maybe if he did and you had the doctor tell him a little bit about what it's like being pregnant. Some guys are just air headed though and they can't seem to think about anyone, but them selves. It discussed me how guys can act like that especially when your pregnant and this is when you need him the most. I'm not trying to be negative, but it sounds like to me that you don't need some one like that in your life. You want someone who's going to be supportive and stick by your side through everything. I must say that I'm a lucky person to have my boyfriend. I'm 7months pregnant and he does everything for me especially cause I'm pregnant. he does anything I want with a snap of a finger. I have a friend in your same situation and trust me if hes causing you stress then thats not good for you as a mother to be and its not healthy for your unborn child. If i were you I would sit down and think about the situation and the future.... what happens if y'all decide to have another baby? is he going to continue to act selfish?

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I'm so sorry he is being a jerk.

    Sounds like you should order in for yourself, not both of you. I know there are places that will go pick up food from certain restaurants where I'm at. Perhaps you can find a place like that where you are at.

    6-8 weeks left, you can do it.

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  • 1 decade ago

    I have 4 kids and I feel sorry for you! What is your boyfriend going to do when the baby is here? If he is not willing to help you now what will he do when diapers need changed, middle of the night feedings, bath time and so on? You are carrying his child. You need to have a heart to heart with him. It is natural to feel soooo tired right now. Let things go if you have too...it's not going anywhere...you need to take care of that baby and you are the only one who can. Let him take care of himself.

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  • allie
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    sorry to say this but let him starve. find a little something for yourself. pick up only your things or nothing at all and let him see how much work you do. then he might see that you do alot and need the help. my husband found out the hard way when he had to do all this on his own when i was pregnant with my son. good luck.

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  • 1 decade ago

    If you feel that bad especially with the flu like symptoms call a doctor or visit an after hours clinic. At 32 weeks most are tired but not necessarily sickly. Please call a doctor ASAP.

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