Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Entertainment & MusicJokes & Riddles Β· 1 decade ago

afew irish jokes are these funny?

Murphy told Quinn that his wife was driving him to drink. Quinn thinks he's very lucky because his own wife makes him walk.

The late Bishop Sheen stated that the reason the Irish fight so often among themselves is that they're always assured of having a worthy opponent.

An American lawyer asked, "Paddy, why is it that whenever you ask an Irishman a question, he answers with another question? "Who told you that?" asked Paddy.

Reilly went to trial for armed robbery. The jury foreman came out and announced, "Not guilty." "That's grand!" shouted Reilly. "Does that mean I can keep the money?"

Irish lass customer: "Could I be trying on that dress in the window?" Shopkeeper: "I'd prefer that you use the dressing room."

A Kerryman went to London and found himself in the Underground late one night. Seeing a notice "DOGS MUST BE CARRIED ON THE ESCALATOR", he moaned to himself, "And where am I going to find a dog at this hour of the night?"

A Kerryman was suffering from pains in his knees, so he visited the doctor.

"You're suffering from a disease that we medical experts call "kneeitis", said the doctor. "Take it easy for a month or so and above all don't climb any stairs. That puts a terrible strain on the knees."

A month later the Kerryman returned and after a brief examination was found to have recovered completely.

"Can I climb the stairs now Doctor?"

"Certainly," replied the Doctor.

"Thank Heavens," said the Kerryman, "I was getting a bit browned off climbing up the drainpipe every time I wanted to go to the toilet."

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  • poppy1
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago
    Best Answer

    Hi Ducky,

    Hahahahahahahaha...I Loved all of them My Friend..What a Great way to go out..You earn a Big Star Sweetie..

    A Friend,

    poppy1

    P.S. Chris I am leaving Q.A. For awhile..My Dad as gotten a little worse and the up keep of the house,very large yard,doing Dads banking,paying His Bills,Laundry and the list gos on..It's getting pretty hard on Me and when I do come to Q.A. I have some many question(279)in one day I just can't keep-up..I need to get things done here and catch-up since My Dead Beat 2 Brothers will not Help Me with all of this..Besides this I My Self draw S.S.D. I will be gone awhile and I will Especially miss you and all of My Friends on Q.A.

  • Stacy
    Lv 4
    4 years ago

    There funny yes , and im sure a lot of Irish people find them funny but.... calling them drunks ? Idiots? Non political ? Or Pikeys .. is when the jokes cross the line , tell them in private .

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Mmmm. The Irish have a very unique sense of humour, the friendliest race I have ever encountered, and have a unique way of finding humour in anything. More than that, they can laugh at themselves. So let's hope that political correctness never loses us our treasured Irish jokes. Having said that, yours are rather lame. Let's at least credit them with some decent jokes.

  • A Irishman was reroofing his house. He'd pick up a nail and pound it in. Then he'd pick up a nail and toss it over his shoulder. He kept doing this until a Scottsman asked him why.

    The Irishman said the ones he threw over his shoulder had the heads on the wrong end.

    The Scottsman said you damn fool. Those are for the other side.

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  • cats
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    Funny! 100!

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Excellent, ha ha!!10/10.LOL.

    Paddy went for an interview for a job on the building site.

    Site gaffer says "Right paddy I'll ask you a question,if you get it right you get the job".

    Paddy all excited says "Ask me the question,ask me the question".

    Site gaffer asks the question,"Old MacDonald had a farm,spell farm".

    Paddy replies"EIEIO".

    Good old joke from the UK.

  • 1 decade ago

    I was the Kerryman, (Hee,Hee,Hee,) born 15 - 7- 1937

    in Killarney.

    Source(s): kerryman
  • 1 decade ago

    A couple were funny, the underground and the window shopper. The rest were only so-so.

  • 1 decade ago

    haha im Irish and proud of it you get a star they are very funny i also have a sense of humour they actually made me laugh out loud

  • 1 decade ago

    Yes, most of them are pretty funny. :) The first two weren't as great as the rest IMHO.

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