? asked in 社會與文化語言 · 1 decade ago

求救!幫找英文自傳錯誤地方

My name is Su Yu-te. I am now 18 years old. I study at Pei-men senior high school. I come from a sweet well-to-do family. There are six people in my family. They are my parents, three sisters and I. My father is a worker, and my mother is a housewife. Everyone says that I am very lucky to have three sisters, indeed! They always give me advice of something or give me a helping hand when I in need. I am really thankful what I have.

Update:

Besides, I am really interested in medical technology, for I want to save people from disease. And my father suffers from the mouse cancer, I deeply want to help him.

Update 2:

看這些句子有沒有哪裏錯誤

Update 3:

Besides, they always stand by my side when I persue my goal.

2 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    以不修改過多文字,不多改原意原則

    如果你是還念高中:I am studying at ...

    畢業了:I graduated from...

    well-to-do 是指富有的,建議用 affluent,

    可改成 a sweet and affluent family

    家人那句可以連成一句

    in my family, including my parents and three sisters. ( and I 可不寫)

    indeed 的用法有用做副詞形容用,這裡在逗號後用,不太對(另種 indeed 用法是疑問句時用的…)。

    通常用來加強語氣,就會分開為另一句 Indeed!

    如果你是要寫作文,建議不要用indeed 太口語化。建議寫 I totally agree that.

    They always give me advice of something or give me a helping hand when I in need.

    something 有點多餘。helping hand 也很口語。in need 文法用得不對。

    直接建議改成 They always give me good advice or help me while I need.

    thankful 後面可加 for

    下兩句最好拆開,

    technology. One of reason is I want to save...

    mouse cancer. I deelply...

    最後一句建議為:

    Besides, my family always support me whatever goal I am aiming for.

    Source(s): 自已
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  • 1 decade ago

    My name is Su Yu-te. I am now 18 years old. Currently, I am studying at Pei-men senior high school. I come from a sweet family. There are six people in my family. They are my parents, three sisters and I. My father is a worker, and my mother is a housewife. Everyone says that I am very lucky to have three sisters! They always give me good advices give me a helping hand whenever I need it. I am really thankful for what I have.

    Besides, I am really interested in medical technology, for which I want to save people from diseases. And my father suffers from cancer, I want to provide helps to him as much as I can.

    Besides, they always stand by my side when I persue my goal.

    Source(s): 有問題, 請加我cpyang26@hotmail.com
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