Im 16 and may may be getting MARRIED...I NEED HELP???

So i live with my dad...my mom is out of the picture...but my dad doesn't want me in his house because his girlfriend doesn't like me..so he knows i have a boyfriend he is 18..my boyfriends mom is willing to take me in (adopt me) but my dad says the only way he is willing to let me live with my boyfriend is if i get married to him..and he will sign the papers for me to be emancipated...i don't know what to do right now...i need some support and good advise...

NO MEAN COMMENTS...IM STRESSED ENOUGH...I NEED HELP...

28 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    getting married is only going to make things worse for you.

    If you dad is willing to sign the papers to have you emancipated but will only let you live with your boyfriend if you are married ... then why don't you have him sign that papers first and then move in with your boyfriend without having to get married. Once he signs those papers, you are no longer his responsibility ...

    and can I just say you dad sounds like a TERRIBLE person and father. Any man that will kick his own daughter out of his house because his girlfriend doesn't like him, shouldn't have you in his life anyway.

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  • Kate
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    DO NOT get married just please your dad. I'm not saying this to be mean, I would just like to shake your father. He's doing something terrible to you. You can emancipate yourself from your father with out his permission. If you have a really good school guidance counseller, this person should be able to help you out. If not, ask on the legal section here. Explain that your dad is pressuring you into marriage before you turn 18. Also, in some states you are old enough to decide at 16 where you live. I can't believe the things some parents come up with......

    If you get really, really desperate, you could always just go live with your boyfriend and his mom with out your dad's permission. Depending on the state that you are in, he might be able to call the police but if he really wants you gone, I'm not sure he'd do that. Also, he'd have to know that you might explain the situation to the cops, which would make him look like a complete jerk. I hope this works out for you. Please don't get married until you are ready!!!!!!

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I'm so sorry you're going through this. Getting married is a big commitment even for people twice your age. Please don't take that wrong, because I'm not putting you down for your age. I went through a very similar situation when I was your age. My dad wanted me gone due to his current wife not liking me. But, he never pushed me to get married. He should just sign the papers for you to be emancipated without the conditions of being married if that's what seems best for you all. But, I think he's only doing it so he doesn't have to be responsible for anything. I'm sorry but your dad needs to grow up and get his priorities straight. You are his daughter and still considered a child, you are his responsiblility and no girlfriend should ever get in the way of that. Do you have other relatives you could possibly stay with? Don't rush out and get married. It's hard enough to be a teen today and then have a father pushing you to get out of the house AND get married on top of that. If you need anyone to talk to, IM me. Keep your head up.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I actually feel for you. Your parents have screwed up your life majorly- your dad is trying to be a dad, by telling you you have to marry your boyfriend, but he is not a very good dad because he chose his girlfriend over you.

    Here is what you should do. Get yourself emancipated or something, your dad doesn't seem to care about you. Then live with the family of a girlfriend or another family member until you are out of high school. Actually- don't get emancipated, your dad needs to still be responsible for your. Tell him that if he does not want you to live with him or your boyfriend that he needs to pay for your rent at an apartment until you are about 21 and can get a decent paying job.

    I would not reccomend getting married under these circumstances. You have said nothing about loving your boyfriend. It sounds to me like you want to marry him so that you will have a place to live. That is never a good reason to be married and especially not at your age. You need to get a few years under your belt, so that you improve on your situation. I am so sad that your sorry excuse for parents put you in this situation.

    I want to encourage you to read two books- "10 Stupid things women Do to Mess Up Their Lives" and "Bad Childhood, Good Life" They are both by Dr. Laura Schelssinger.

    I hope you can do the right thing. If you have a friend with a good stable home life and in tact family- maybe you can go live with them and see how real families behave towards each other.

    I truly am sad for you situation. Don't become a statistic, become a good strong woman and change the lives of your children.

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  • 1 decade ago

    Wow. I feel for you since I definitely know what it's like to be in a similar situation (mom out of the picture, dad taking sides with gf instead of family). But if he doesn't want you in his house, why is he making rules for you that don't apply to being under his roof? Makes no sense. You could have him sign the papers and then move in with your boyfriend without marrying him and your dad would be nonethewiser. Normally I'm not a supporter of high school age marriages but if you feel in your heart that this is the right thing to do then follow your gut. No one else can decide that for you.

    Best of luck!

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  • 1 decade ago

    this is no reason to get married. why would your dad be so thoughtless and cruel to you and say that? it's just asking for trouble. even if you and your bf like each other a lot or even think you love eachother marriage is a big thing to deal with and not for someone who still is just a kid. I guess if all else fails and you are forced to get married then you could have it annulled. WOW! do you have any other relatives? grandparents? aunts?

    your dad is wrong picking his gf over his own child.

    you can petition the courts yourself for emancipation but in order for that to happen you would have to prove to the courts that you can provide for yourself. job, apartment etc..

    maybe you could stay at another friends house for a little bit?

    your dad needs some serious help. I'm sorry I can't really help will any of these suggestions help? (relatives)

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Why Would She Adopt You? I Mean You And Your BoyFriend Sister And Brother? You Shouldn't Be Pressured Into Marrying Anyone What So Ever. And I Thikn It's Wrong FOr YOU Having To Move Out Because Of Your Dad's Girl Friend, Your His Daughter. I Mean I Think It Would Be Cool Just TO Live With Your Boyfriend Until Things Don't Work Out Any More.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    You could go for emancipation, get an evening job and move into some low income housing on your own. I'm sure it sounds scary, but I know other girls who have made it work. Getting married for your dad would be a bad move. Best of luck!

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  • 1 decade ago

    Do not marry your boyfriend as a way out I say just stay with your dad screw his girlfriend To me it seems like your dad does not really want you out that bad cuz if he did he would just let you go but then I do not know the man I know at 16 where I am from you can move out and there is nothing he can do you. Or your father wants you out but does not want to be responmsible at all for you. So just tell him listen I am too young to get MARRIED. i WANT OUT YOU WANT ME OUT i DO NOT WNAT TO GET MARRIED AND THEN END UP HAVING KIDS AND NOT BEING WITH THEIR FATHER (LIKE YOUR PARENTS) tell him you do not have to be maaried to be emaciapated and if he signs the papers any responsbuilitie he has for you would be gone weather you got married or not

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    My friend left the house when she was 16 by getting emancipated. She went through the guidance counselor at school. Talk to yours, they should be able to help your resolve the situation. I'm not sure if your dad actually has to sign the papers...your guidance counselor should know the procedure. I would hate to see you get married just to get emancipation papers signed...try to find an alternative to that.

    Definitely talk to your guidance counselor though. The one at my school got my friend out of an awful situation after years of terrible parenting.

    Source(s): happened to my friend
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