Hm. The biggest thing that ever happened to me was probably my parents divorce one year ago. My father is a severely abusive drug addict and alcoholic. My mother was 7 months pregnant with my brother when she finally decided to separate from him and I was 17 when she finally decided to file for divorce. (I'm now 18) It was hard though because my parents were married for 22 years.
It effected me in SO many ways, I cannot even explain. Now, I'm not making excuses as to why I did certain things I did, however at the age of 14 I was raped and started experimenting with drugs. At the age of 16 I became addicted to cocaine, dropped out of highschool, and ended up being kicked out of my house having the only place to go being my abusive 21 year old boyfriend's meth house. (I have never tried meth for the record, it's the only drug I haven't done) The drugs became my escape into another world, where I didn't have to live with the pain and realization that I will never have a father that loved me, that would be able to take me to a baseball game, that would be there to walk me down the aisle one day. I had a father that chose alcohol and drugs over his family, and it hurt so much that I wanted to take away all that pain. When I was doing drugs I felt on top of the world, like the most beautiful human being that ever lived. Then I ended up overdosing on coke and crack twice. The second time I overdosed was on my dad's living room couch, actually, with him right in front of me. He was laughing at me and told me it's the consequences of doing the drugs.
Eventually I saw my mom for the first time in months, completely coked up. My mom just started sobbing her eyes out when she saw me. I'd lost 25lbs, my skin was pale, my eyes had black all around them. I thought I looked wonderful, but my mom saw someone completely different than the happy baby that the doctors handed 17 years ago in the hospital. After seeing my mom react that way I never touched cocaine again. I was admitted into rehab less than a month later, and in two days it will be a year since I've done cocaine. I now am back in college, I have a nice job, and what hurts the most is that my mom never has given up on me. She is the reason I'm alive today.
The whole experience made me realize that those that love you could be gone at any moment, so not to take advantage of them. My mom was diagnosed with HPV and pre-cervical cancer, on top of skin cancer recently... so I feel like if anything does happen to her I'll never be able to forgive myself for that pain I caused her.
I live in the US, and I associate myself with no specific religion.
· 1 decade ago