girlfriend needs space?

my gf is temporarly moving out (signed a 6 month sublease) because she "needs space". she says she still wants to date me, but needs to make her own friends and have her own social life. i can understand this because we do spend the majority of our time together. but am i fool for believing this? i kind of get the feeling she is having commitment issues. do i just give her space and how much? do i wait for her to call? i want to give her space because i do love her, but i also dont want to be strung along if she is looking to date others (which means im done with the relationship). is it normal for girls to have/need space?


thanks for all the advice. we have been together for about a year and a half and have lived together for a year. this did not come out of the blue, we had tried to spend some time apart with our own friends. i dont think im controlling, but i'd always ask her what she did the night before, where she slept if she stayed over, etc. she said i was prying too much, but shouldnt she be willing to share that info? i always tell her what i did because i think that is part of being in a relationship. i think our problem is that we did spend every minute together. maybe she does just need some space to be herself. she says she does feel married and is too young for that (24) and just wants to be young and have some fun. i guess im just mored worried about her cheating on me than anything (i had it happen in the past).

11 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    hello there.

    so your problem is about having space.

    well it's true we need to have our own space for our friends and family, especially for ourselves.

    do you want your relationship too end too quickly because of spending to much time together?

    i don't think you want that to happen..

    spending too much quality time together can bore a relationship very quickly and soon lost interest with each other so to prevent this from happening,

    let the two of you have your own space to miss each other and to make your relationship even stronger.

    i know it's kinda hard to accept that your girlfriend needs a quality time but she's doing the right thing, she's not only rescuing your relationship but also she want to enjoy herself being with her friends and making herself to miss you..

    she is just your girlfriend and not your wife.

    that means you don't own her yet.

    so she is free to choose who ever she want to meet or who ever she wants to be with(like her friends)

    but within this space, you must trust her with all of your heart..

    trust is the key in this relationship..

    no matter who she is with,

    you must trust her and show to her your commitment and then she will know that your the best bf she could ever had and she will love you more..

    trust me , i been there !

  • 1 decade ago

    How long have you two been together?

    I currently live with my boyfriend, we've been together for two years and our biggest issue at the moment is that we're never apart. Since we both work from home it can be a little overwhelming to not have much of a social life on my own, he feels the same way at times.

    I wouldn't consider it to be a commitment issue. If she's young she's entitled to be with her friends and relax outside of the relationship. I think you should really sit down and discuss it with her. I know that financially speaking my boyfriend and I can't live apart for a while, especially considering any family I have is located 4 hours away in another state.

    I don't think you're a fool, but I think you need to find out for sure what her intentions are. If she truly wants to just have her own space for a while that could lead to two things with your relationship.

    #1 - It could strengthen the relationship. It would make your time together that much more valuable.

    #2 - It could potentially mean that she's working her way away from it.

    Do you two argue a lot or did this come out of no where? If it's the first one then it could be that she's scared of the commitment and unsure of where things are going. If it's the second one, then sitting down with her and talking it out is really the best option for you guys.

    She's entitled to her own space, and you are as well.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    The only legitimate reason for a girl to ask for space, is if her man is restricting her time with friends, or hes over- controlling. Since you didnt say anything about you being over controlling or anything in your post, im guessing your a pretty good guy. Taking a break and moving out is a huge deal, and if your not the jealus, over protective controlling guy, then might want to be a liittle concerned. Shes going to take the space no matter what, she already moved out. I would wait for her to call, because she wants to get a feel of the "single life" otherwise she would still live with you. It seems like you might get strung along because if she loved you as much as you love her, she would want to stay living with you, but just hang out with her friends more/ have a little more alone time like going shopping alone, ect. But shes not willing to do that. she wants to move out, so i would be very suspicious. It seems like shes trying to hide something i mean, what does she need her own place? whats going on at the new place that she wouldnt want you to see happen at your place? I would tell her that her break should be what i mentioned above, (the hanging out with friends, ect) or she can go ahead and have her new life, that shes obviously starting without you in a new place, all by herself.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago


    Usually when a person wants space they really want out of the relationship and focusing on someone else but at the same time don't really want to hurt the other person. So the best trick to resolve this is tell her o.k. and that you need space too. Once you give her space don't call her right away, let her call you. The Trick is you have to show less interest as possible an order to regain her attention on you. Woman can't stand to have no attention. Thereafter she's going to ask you what's wrong because you haven't been talking to her lately. That when you tell her I thought you wanted space from me? I love you and willing to give you that option. If you want me, show me, if you want space and like to play games go where it's at! Tell her that "Truly love" don't add space but add time and understanding of what needed to enhance the relationship! Space is not the anwser but sitting down and talking about it will help resolve the problem. If she really loves you!!!! Good luck!!!

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  • 1 decade ago

    Just continue things as u have been, just have her live somewhere else. It's very normal for girls to need space. If she starts messing around u will find out about it and u can break up with her, but I don't think thats what she wants to do. She prolly doesn't wanna feel like she's married already....which is how she feels when she lives with u.

  • 1 decade ago

    some girls need space some girls want there boyfriends to be always around same with guys

    just give her space

    dont always call her

    but SOMETIMES make the initiative

    if she doesnt call you for like..3-4 days then you call

    but after that if she doesnt call you, wait longer

    But dont let her basically lead you on thinking that shes gunan come back

    if she doesnt clear up her mind in a few months

    you gotta let her know that

    because in the end ifyou dont, you will get hurt alot more

  • 1 decade ago

    hmm. well, she may be rethinking her own decisions about you and she may need to make sure she's making the right decision. when she's comfortable, u should sit and talk to her about it. like, how you don't wanna force her into anything or something. and when she moves out, you need to occassionally call her to make sure she's okay and to let her know u are there for her and everything. but, it really depends on what type of person she is to determine whether or not she's looking for someone else to date. i'd say just let things happen as they happen. everything happens for a reason.

  • 1 decade ago

    give her space, just not too much, let her know how you care. if you don't talk for a long time she could be taking that as a hint that you don't want anything to do with her. just keep VERY mild tabs on her, calling her periodically, and just pretty much wait it out.


  • 1 decade ago

    yea sometimes we need becouse our feeling like a wave one time in the top hight and other time in the down and for that we need space

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    That's what the all say right before you get dumped.

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