Ladies are these rules for men gift buying?

Buying gifts for men is not nearly as complicated as it is for women. Follow these rules and you should have no problems.

Rule #1:

When in doubt - buy him a cordless drill. It does not matter if he already has one. I have a friend who owns 17 and he has yet to complain. As a man, you can never have too many cordless drills. No one knows why.

Rule #2:

If you cannot afford a cordless drill, buy him anything with the word ratchet or socket in it. Men love saying those two words. "Hey George, can I borrow your ratchet?" "OK. By-the-way, are you through with my 3/8-inch socket yet?" Again, no one knows why.

Rule #3:

If you are really, really broke, buy him anything for his car. A 99-cent ice scraper, a small bottle of deicer or something to hang from his rear view mirror. Men love gifts for their cars. No one knows why.

Rule #4:

Do not buy men socks. Do not buy men ties. And never buy men bathrobes. I was told that if God had wanted men to wear bathrobes, he wouldn't have invented Jockey shorts.

Rule #5:

You can buy men new remote controls to replace the ones they have worn out. If you have a lot of money buy your man a big-screen TV with the little picture in the corner. Watch him go wild as he flips, and flips, and flips.

Rule #6:

Do not buy a man any of those fancy liqueurs. If you do, it will sit in a cupboard for 23 years. Real men drink whiskey or beer.

Rule #7:

Do not buy any man industrial-sized canisters of after shave or deodorant. I'm told they do not stink - they are earthy.

Rule #8:

Buy men label makers. Almost as good as cordless drills. Within a couple of weeks there will be labels absolutely everywhere. "Socks. Shorts. Cups. Saucers. Door. Lock. Sink." You get the idea. No one knows why.

Rule #9:

Never buy a man anything that says "some assembly required" on the box. It will ruin his Special Day and he will always have parts left over.

Rule #10:

Good places to shop for men include Northwest Iron Works, Parr Lumber, Home Depot, John Deere, Valley RV Center, and Les Schwab Tire. (NAPA Auto Parts and Sear's Clearance Centers are also excellent men's stores. It doesn't matter if he doesn't know what it is. "From NAPA Auto, eh? Must be something I need. Hey! Isn't this a starter for a '68 Ford Fairlane? Wow! Thanks.")

Rule #11:

Men enjoy danger. That's why they never cook - but they will barbecue. Get him a monster barbecue with a 100-pound propane tank. Tell him the gas line leaks. "Oh the thrill! The challenge! Who wants a hamburger?"

Rule #12:

Tickets to a Red Wing/Lions/Pistons/Tigers game are a smart gift. However, he will not appreciate tickets to "A Retrospective of 19th Century Quilts." Everyone knows why.

Rule #13:

Men love chainsaws. Never, ever, buy a man you love a chainsaw. If you don't know why - please refer to Rule #8 and what happens when he gets a label maker.

Rule #14:

It's hard to beat a really good wheelbarrow or an aluminum extension ladder. Never buy a real man a step ladder. It must be an extension ladder. No one knows why.

Rule #15:

Rope. Men love rope. It takes us back to our cowboy origins, or at least The Boy Scouts. Nothing says love like a hundred feet of 3/8" manila rope. No one knows why.

Update:

Ladies you can never go wrong with Victorias Secret stuff mmmmmmmmmmm

Update 2:

By the way I meant for the lady to wear it for the man as a gift, although I do look good in some of that stuff lol (kidding).

11 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Best Answer

    LMAO!! What am I going to do now? I was seriously considering a chain saw for his birthday in April. After reading rule # 13, I am a little worried, especially considering we live in a log house.. lol

    Oh yeah, and who are you kidding? We both know why an extension ladder (#14) is always a welcomed gift, the longer the better... lol

  • 1 decade ago

    mmmm lolz Victoria's Secret eh!

    Must say that Ann Summers did the trick this Valentine's lolz!

    loved this although, the chainsaw would probably be all that my man would like lolz seeing as he cooks for a living lolz

  • 1 decade ago

    That is absolutely correct!! I do shop at Sears hardware, and Napa for presents!! And that's exactly why we don't own a chainsaw!!!!!! LOL!!

    -Mel

  • 1 decade ago

    Lol, my hubby always says that the only thing he ever wants/needs is my love. every time i ask him what he would like for his birthday, valentines day and Christmas he says he don't want nothing because he already has it, and that is my love for him. isn't he so sweet? star.

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  • 1 decade ago

    I will have to forget. the rope one. I am so tired of cutting my husband out of the oak trees. You see, he still thinks he Tarzan, and him being sixty two , you would think he' would know better .Right.? the man's driving me nuts,

  • 1 decade ago

    LOL, Ha ha ha , 7/10

  • 1 decade ago

    ha ha ha funny

    thanks for a laugh

  • anna
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    hahahahahaha star

  • 1 decade ago

    that is sooo true...thanks for the ideas.....lol

  • xyz
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    LOL, excellent and very interesting.I'm always stuck to, what to buy for mine. Thanks for sharing, star.

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