以下一段請俾意見:

以下一段請俾意見:

You're invited to join the function for serving XXXX elderly center. Out target is to provide XX service to 100 elderly people. Our gathering time and time will be 9:00am at XXX MTR.

thanks.

2 Answers

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  • ma
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    You're invited to join the function for serving XXXX elderly center.

    > If there is exactly one function going to be every held by your organization, it is fine to use "the." Otherwise, you should use "a."

    > The elderly center is an object and cannot be served. Thus, the use of the verb "serving" is incorrect.

    Out target is to provide XX service to 100 elderly people.

    > Overall, this sentence is OK. It's cleaner if "100 elderly people" is replaced with "100 elders."

    > I suggest that you combine this sentence with the previous one to provide a more comprehensive picture up front. For example: You are invited to join the function to serve 100 elders at the XXXX eldery center.

    Our gathering time and time will be 9:00am at XXX MTR.

    > The second instance of "time" is probably "location."

    > There is no clear indication about the departure time from the MTR station to the elderly center.

    > It is a good idea to be more specific about where to meet at an MTR station.

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  • 1 decade ago

    你究竟係唔識解定係想問人好唔好去參加啫?

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