When my son was 9 we had problems with his anger/emotions as well. We did the counseling thing and I don't think it helped out that much, just let him know from somebody else that I am in charge. We went through some problems at school as well and then told him if he did one more thing wrong his room would be cleaned out!!! He didn't believe us and did what he wanted and when he got in trouble again, everything was gone from his room. he had a bed with sheets, his dresser with clothes and that was it. All his toys and privileges were gone for everything. No screens (tv, gameboy, Xbox360, everything) He then had to earn everything back by being good, and he eventually did. We had to do this twice for him to realize he needed to straighten up and we haven't had any more bad problems since. Good luck!