Heres the deal. I'm 30 and my b/f is 25. We have two kids and have been together for 7 yrs?

We have broke up many times before. I was his first serious relationship. He said we were fighting too much and then we started getting along. The reason why I started complaining was because he was hanging out with this girl and his friends. The girl WAS his friend at first and then he told me he started liking her. Just this last Monday he got his stuff and left me and moved in right with her. She just turned 20 and has no kids. He told me he is happy where he is and she makes him happy. We were together 7 years though! He told me he was sorry and he wished he could take away all my pain. I asked him if we could try again in the future and he didnt say anything. He has known this girl for 3 months and said he knew EVERYTHING about her. What is the chance of the NEW relationship fading and getting past the honeymoon stage as people call it and him coming back to me???? I need advice.

13 Answers

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    OH, The 7 year itch! Don't worry, it's just a phase, he is young and women mature so much faster then guy's do. I do believe he will come back. Don't bother with him, trust me, it will push him further away. When he See's that you are not calling him, He'll wonder why and call you. I have been in the same situation as you. You need to go out with your friends and you will see there is life. When my bf went for someone younger... I was heart broken, I went out with friends and had a great time and met really nice guy's and went on dates and became very happy. My ex bf did not like the life he had with the new girl after 6 or 7 months and wanted me back, I said NO, I'm having way to much fun and sooo happy. He kept on calling me for 2 years! I did not want him back. I met a guy during that 2 years and we got married, I'm happy. I thanked my ex for dumping me because I would have never met this wonderful man. I know you have this sick feeling inside and want him back... Please, it will take sometime to get over it but, you NEED to go out and meet other people. It is the best cure for a heartache. Trust me.

  • 1 decade ago

    I could ask you why would you want him back after he,s been with another woman, but being that you have children with him I understand why you still want him back, as he is the father of your children & you were with him for quite a while, so your off the hook for that one, but what I will tell you is that theirs nothing you can do to get him back, he is where he wants to be, he like a little kid with a new toy, & he wont give up his new toy for a long time, so in the meantime why not better your life by focusing on the positive, like your children who just had their world pulled out from under them? My motto is dont get even, get everything, go out & apply for child support, because at the end of the day you two are not gonna be back together & you wont be friends, so do whats best for you & the children, child support & anything else you can do to better your life & your childrens lives is the best remedy for a broken heart, & do not get involved with a new relationship, as you will only cause more drama & confusion to a already messed up family, & dont be surprised if his new 20 year old honey becomes knocked up, as I see this one coming a mile away.

  • 1 decade ago

    You want him back because?

    The two of you fought often. The fighting stopped as you said because he said the two of you were fighting too much. That means that he stopped fighting and just let you have your way. In other words, he was not happy but placated you.

    It sounds like he is not going to come back even if this relationship fails. It also sounds like if he did come back it would only be until the next girl came along.

    You should discuss child support with him and have a signed contract for the support. The child support agreement should be completed with the help of an attorney so that you can make sure it is enforceable.

    Take care,


  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    You've been together for 7 yrs, since he was 18 and have two kids together correct?

    He is an immature person, No marriage, no committment, steady sex except when you are bitching at him, right?

    You might read Dr. Laura's book "Ten stupid things women do"..

    He has to decide to be a man, and get serious about being a father, you have to get serious about being a spouse.

    Sounds a bit like you've got a bit of immaturity as well..

    Your hope of keeping the relationship went out the door with him, he needs to consider his obligation both legal and emotional to his children at this point. You need to write off the relationship between he and you and make the best for your children.

  • How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    As I say in all my answers LOVE HURTS.

    It is just the honey moon stage. As soon as he start paying child support and have to pick up the kids, trust me that young thing is going to say "see ya". He may or may not want to come back; but honey you don't want him back because he is going to do it again and again.

    My ex left me for a younger thing. After 2 years he asked to come back. After 5 years she left him because he never had any money. Child Support, Spousal Support, Alimony - the man truly had no money.

    It's been 8 years now and he is still in and out of relationships and still asking if he can come home.

    You have to follow your heart and mind and do what is best for you and the kids. It's easy for us on the outside looking in to say what we would do.

    Good Luck

  • Sondra
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    My advice to you is to stop getting pregnant with men who don't want to marry you. It doesn't really matter how long he was your boyfriend----It's pretty clear that you did not have a committed relationship---and instead had a rocky relationship all the way. The fact that you placed this question in marriage and divorce indicates that you really believed that getting pregnant and shacking up with him equated to marriage and committment! Most men like younger women, not older ones so it doesn't surprise me that he would lose interest in you. So, you need to get your head on straight. You should try to legally get some child support from him. Try to move on a find a man you can get along with, who will want to marry you.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    tough one, i think if you take him back he will do this again with the same girl or someone else. put the foot down and tell him to man up or get out. he has kids to think about as well and should try and set a decent example. time to grow up, he made a commitment and should have the balls to see it through. dont hang around waiting for him if he is with the other girl, move on and be happy because you will always be wondering if it will happen again if you stay with him

  • 1 decade ago

    hi dear this is deepika here,i think n i m cofident tht ur bf wil come back to u said u were in a relation since 7 yr n two kids then definetly he wil come to u.ur bf wil b very happy now cos he think now there is no fights n dear in every relation ther are fights n ur husband is just havin infatuation i feel.cos he can leave a person who was with him since 7 yrs do u think he can keep any long term relation wit a person whom he knws from 3 months??? just wait n dont keep on callin him.just cal him once a week n ask how u r? t kids r missin u.dont tel him or force him to come him accidently in office or some other place n show him tht u can sty without alwys ask him ur happy n then tel i m happy cos ur happy.i alwys wish u b sucessful n happy.n i think u shud keep hope cos he said i wish i cud take all t pain of urs ,tht means he still has some feelings 4 u.keep hope n do as i said.take care n i wish ur bf cums back to u,bt when he cums back ur nt going to fight wit him reply me on

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    The #1 reason marriage (or living together) fails is MONEY!

    SO if you want his current relationship to fail TAKE HIS MONEY! What I am saying is go to court and get child support COURT ORDERED child support!

    Trust me when the new lady wants him to help paying bills and he has NO MONEY because he is paying child support HER attraction to him will go FAST!

    NOW that being said show some pride and DON'T take him back! You deserve a man that will love you unconditionally and wants to marry you and spend the rest of his life with you!

  • 1 decade ago

    Why would you want him back after he left you? If you allow him to come back then he'll just leave and hurt you again for someone else. Move on with your life. It really hurts right now but he seems immature and with the kids you don't need that right now. Just focus on you and your kids right now and forget about that loser.

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.