My mum neglects me .. i think she hates me :(?

well im 15 years old.. and i live with all my family. my mum just seems to neglect me and ignore me as if i'm not there. She loves the rest of my brothers and sisters so much and always bosses me around and shows me no motherly love. This leads to me always feeling unconfident, sad and lonely. Ironically when ever she is ill, as she suffers from a bad illness, im always there to help her, and no one else bothers, i love her soo much i just wish she could show even a tiny bit of love towards me like she does to all the rest. And it aint that they are young, 2 of them are in their 20's and she stil cares for them more then me. I aint just imagining it.. its all true. They all say really horrible things to me and gang up on me calling me, fat, ugly etc.

Please help..


she actually tells me that she hates me and wishes i was never born. It hurts so much

Update 2:

im doing really good in scool because its the only thing i've got left to pay time and attention to. When im studying or doing homework i feel in a world of my own were no one ca hurt me. I also clean my room and never talk back to her, just listen to everythink she has got to say..

7 Answers

  • Favorite Answer

    I want to first say that I know how you feel I have also experienced this and still do but I am twice your age and don't have to live with them anymore.

    The best advice I could possibly give you is to try and work on your self esteem as family that mis-treat you can have a really bad effect on it.

    Just try and believe in yourself and affirm to yourself all the good things that you are.

    I think you will find this link really useful

    All the best with moving forward in your life :0)

    Edit: after reading the answer below me, it pushed me to add some more to my answer.

    Your mum's anger is NOT your fault, infact it is nothing to do with your actions. Your mum clearly has issues, I know this from my own experience growing up with my mum who emotionally abused me. Just remember she is the one with the problem not you and until she see's the error in her ways she will not change.

    NEVER blame yourself for anyone elses actions, NEVER!

    Your are probably an amazing kid who is full of potential and this is why it is really important to work on your self-esteem and not let anyone else tell you different.

    Hope this helps. Good luck!

  • 1 decade ago

    I suspect that your Mum just loves you so much that its a bit like familiar things are always comfortable and its not that we neglect them it is just an unsaid love that is joined in the heart

    When did YOU last tell her that you love her?

    If you find it hard because of your own feelings write her a letter tell her how you feel and ask her to help you sort out your mixed feelings. You know that one day she may not be there and you will wish you had sorted it. Do it today.

  • 1 decade ago

    ooh! I feel sorry for you! I hope I help- well... sometimes I feel that way, and I've found that sometimes moms have a lot on their minds, and (especially with lots of kids) they can forget about showing love evenly among their kids, I've found that the best way to deal with this is to tell her! It's not easy thinking about it, and it's harder doing it, but after it's over, it comes out ok. Does she know you feel bad? If you're bad at talking out emotions, write them out and place a note somewhere like on her dresser or bed, later, check to see if it's there. If it's not, go up to her and ask her if she's read it. It's pretty ok from there. Hope I helped! *Mayley

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    omg! i am 15 and i have posted a question exactly the same as this i am in the exact same position i am one of 11 kids and my mum has always treated me different and my brothers and sisters gang up on me! calling me fat etc! i always feel worthless! but i feel fine when im out with my seee my mum isnt the mum u can talk to but u shud try and talk with yours after all she is your mum get bak 2 me or somethingx

  • How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    well im sure your mum does love you and she just hasnt realised how lucky she is to have you as you care for her when she is ill but as for the name calling you are probably a pretty person and as for being fat well there is always someone bigger than you and you probably aint fat and if anyone calls you fat again then say i was born like this whats your excuse just stand up for yourself in otherward dont let then get to you

  • 1 decade ago

    she is most likly hard on u becuz she knows ur the strong1 in the family out of the rest of the family and the rest need that extra love

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    OK im sorry about that but do you have bad grades or is your room messy and do you do what she says because that is just like my life. have you ever done anything bad in your house or are you the middle child because sometimes that is the case. Does she ever get mad from work or from her freinds or work be cause most of the time thats what happens but if that isnt it im sorry have you ever asked why she does do that .maybe she does that because she cares about you.

    Source(s): my life is the same kind of
Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.