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How to keep being obedient to parents when we have so many disagreements?

10 Answers

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Thy Lord has commanded that ye worship none but Him, and that ye show kindness to parents. If one or both of them attain old age with thee, never say to them as much as ugh nor reproach them, but always address them with kindly speech.

    And We have enjoined on mankind kindness to parents; but if they contend with thee to make thee associate that with ME of which thou hast no knowledge, then obey them not. Unto ME is your return, and I shall inform you of what you did.

    But the one who says to his parents, 'Fie on you both; do you threaten me that I shall be brought forth again, when generations have already passed away before me?' And they both cry unto Allah for help and say to him. 'Woe unto thee! believe, for the promise of Allah is true.' But he says, 'This is nothing but the fables of the ancients.'

    And lower them the wing of humility out of tenderness. And say, 'My Lord, have mercy on them even as they nourished me when I was a little child.'

    Holy Quran

    The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him and his family and companions) said:

    “One, who follows the orders of Allah with regards to obeying parents, shall have two doors of Paradise opened up for him. And if there happens to be only one parent, one door of Paradise shall open up for him.”

    Imam as-Sadiq (as) said:

    “Goodness towards the parents is an indication of a person’s excellent cognizance of Allah. This is because there is no worship that can take a person towards the happiness of Allah faster than exhibiting respect towards his Muslim parents for the sake of Allah.”

    Imam Muhammad al-Baqir (as) said:

    “There are three things which Allah, the Mighty and the Glorious has not permitted anyone to forsake: returning a trust to its owner, irrespective of whether he is a good person or an evil one; fulfilling one’s promises and covenants, irrespective of whether it has been made to a good person or an evil one; being good and kind towards one’s parents, irrespective of whether they are good or evil.”

  • 1 decade ago

    First of all obey thy parents is the priciples of Islam and " paradise lies under the feat of thy mother" in Islam as well is the theme and sayings in many a relegions. It does not limit to your mother only, to your father too. Obedience is a must towards parents by children.

    Parents are responsible for all good and bad their children do. so are they answerable to god directly on the day of judgment, as well as ther forgiveness and Du'as are the rewads to paradise on the day of judgment for the children.

    As known to many, unfortunately parents do object to so many things in a childs life, the good and the bad too.

    all these are in the idea of protecting the child.

    And as per Islam's view and teachings its a must for the children to obey your parents.........what evr the reasons maybe. At the same time you are free and obliged to correct and discuss any issues with them amicably, so that you not hurt them.

    Should the reasoning not satisfy all efforts should be taken to authenticate your understanding and teachings, and then only should you get away from their guidance ONLY on that particular issue.

    AND always remember they are your you know what it means!

  • je
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    Islam_4 I am sorry for you heartache. Actually you made me cry. I am sure your mom loves you very much maybe she just is incapable of showing it or expressing it well.

    It is very hard sometimes to do what our parents expect of us. Especially if it goes against our own motives in life..I guess the best you really can do is just to make an effort to explain to your parents what your wants and needs are and try to come to some type of understanding. I think some parents are really stubborn on certain issues. My brother-in-law was dead set on marrying this girl and his parents refused. Not much he can do so he has been depressed for about two months. I guess we all can look at things like this a certain way. We can think and know that we will be rewarded for our sacrifices to make our parents happy so long as they do not ask of us things which are against the Quran and Sunnah.

  • 1 decade ago

    I'm having the same dilema. I have not seen my mom for 16 years, They came here last year.

    My 22 yr old brother and I are always fighting and my mum is always on his side.

    and the other day I told her and are on his side bcus you raised him and not him:( never loved me and I dont care.:( that was very bad.

    I hurt her pretty bad. I still feel terrible.:(..


    Jenn Jazakallahu are kind..

    I dont know what I was thinking about. I should just zipp it next time I get mad.


    samantha. I know fathers cannot resist that. lolz. even my daughter runs to her father when I say "NO". and she is only three.

  • 1 decade ago

    As long as they don't tell you to do anything outside of Islam you should do your best to honor them and obey them.

    Praise be to Allaah.

    Allaah has commanded us to honour our parents in many places in His Book, such as when He says (interpretation of the meaning):

    “And We have enjoined on man to be good and dutiful to his parents; but if they strive to make you join with Me (in worship) anything (as a partner) of which you have no knowledge, then obey them not. Unto Me is your return and I shall tell you what you used to do”

    [al-‘Ankaboot 29:8]

    The greatest of rights are the rights of Allaah, after which come the rights of created beings, foremost among which are the rights of parents. Hence Allaah mentions His rights and parents’ rights together in many verses of the Holy Qur’aan, such as when He says (interpretation of the meaning):

    “And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him. And that you be dutiful to your parents. If one of them or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them a word of disrespect, nor shout at them but address them in terms of honour.”

    [al-Isra’ 17:23]

    Obeying parents is obligatory unless they enjoin sin, in which case they should not be obeyed. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “There is no obedience to any created being if it involves disobedience towards the Creator.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 4340; Muslim, 1840; Ahmad, 1098.

  • atbt
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    Somebody has to give in and avoid being egoistic.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago


    O LORD, give me to enjoy moderation,

    make me into one of the people of

    right behaviour, the proofs of right

    conduct, and the servants of

    righteousness, and provide me with

    triumph at the place of Return and

    safety from the Ambush!


    Source(s): Justice League Batman
  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Allah says obey your parents..!! So obey em..!! I think different too but still obey em..!!

  • 1 decade ago

    Don't tell them about your disagreements...



    OR run to daddy... make a puppy face... tell him what you want... he can't resist it... lol...

    I get everything I want like this... hihihihi... this includes the time I got more than a 1000 dollars for Eid when I was just in middle school... lol... my brother was pissed!

  • 1 decade ago

    if they want something which is against Islam or at least makrooh, then disobey them, you can

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