POLL for kind, smart, funny, respectful and "non controlling" men, or women who have them......?

I've recently ended a 12 year "bad" relationship and I am looking for a bit of hope that there are men of good quality out there.

NOT looking for someone here, just a statistic regarding the number of you out there......

Thanks in advance.

23 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Hang in there, Jade, men like that really do exist. Like several of the others I went through two relationships (1 marriage) to "the man of my dreams" only to have those relationships fizzle and die; then my Laz found me, and he is the epitome of the man you have described, and so much more! Those two prior relationships were a growth and learning experience for me, as I came to realize what I did and did not want in a man, and discovered that I did not have to settle for second best. How fortunate I am to have Laz in my life, and my wish for you is that someday when the time is right your "perfect man" will find you as well. Merry Christmas, and p&l

    laz here-just thought this should be answered by a woman---smile and enjoy the night

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  • 1 decade ago

    Girl...there is hope.

    I know it doesn't feel like it, but believe me, there are good men out there. I found one recently. :o) I have a lot of hope now. He is the most respectful and kind man I have ever known (other than my father). So they do exist.

    I've been through what you're going through. Actually I'm going through it right now as well. A 3-year relationship with someone aggressive, controlling, and violent has just recently ended for me. Thank God its over and I can get on with my life.

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  • Zee
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    Without thinking hard, I can name 10 men in my circle of friends (one of whom is my spouse) who honor and respect women - not in a gaggy, false, flattery, oily sweet-talking, good looking, ain't-I-something kind of way. (Trying to describe a feeling - don't know how well I'm doing. :)

    The "good" men I know recognize strength and intelligence in women; respect our opinions; listen to us, participate and collaborate WITH us, (rather than make everything a personal or gender-superior power struggle).

    If your religious beliefs are unconventional or non-existent, I would recommend visiting a Unitarian Universalist Church, as it has been my experience that a huge percentage of UU men have healthy relationships (including friendships) with women. If you are mainstream or devoutly Theist, this may not be your cup of tea.

    Another good place to find good men is where good people volunteer; food banks, Habitat for Humanity, homeless shelters, etc.

    They ARE out there, Jade. And sometimes they are potential partners disguised as friends!

    Namaste,

    -Z

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Well I suppose self promotion is ,in this case o.k. -I am totally non-controlling,non-jealous[why be like that?] and except for now,funny,funny ,funny.Educated,business owner,tall,blah & blah ,blah..."BUT" as a little detail that I now disclose early in a relationship,for a reason. I'm totally hung up [sexually] with "spanking" type roll play,foreplay,[anyday??] So "Mr. Niceguy" with a peculiar passion for paddling...doable or ??

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I was a 37 year old confirmed bachelor. Then this angel came from out of nowhere and whacked me on the head. I've been dizzy for 14 years now. TD

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  • Janet
    Lv 4
    4 years ago

    Funny! 10!

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  • 1 decade ago

    In parts:

    Smart and funny - that's easy, there are tons of them!

    Kind and respectful - much more rare, but you can find some.

    Non controlling - I never found one, and that's one of the reasons I chose not to get married.

    Good luck!! :)

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  • well..I am in my 12th year with a guy.

    I have come to realize that they are all the same.

    Some just better or worse than others.

    No matter who you're with..you're gonna have to put up

    with something in some pint in time.

    All guys are been raised or programmed to be in this control crap. From what they've seen in their homes growing up.

    Women were alot more submissive back then.

    Since I have been in this relationship I have refused to be controlled or what have ya. Now that I am finacially dependent

    on him...it has come out of him. This wanna tell me what to do

    and when to do it. Isn't that just a bunch of bullshit?

    This causes wars between us. Its how our rolls have changed.

    And he's taking on this "God like/worship me" type crap.

    Its horrible...

    We are on rocky terms now.

    Source(s): I'll never obey any man. He should earn love and respect, I'll glady respond because I want to not because I have to.
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  • 1 decade ago

    In my expeirence all of the "smart, funny, respectful, and non controlling men" are either already taken, gay, or to young to have a drivers license.

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  • 1 decade ago

    i am lucky after having a selfish boyfriend i finally found the one who is anything but, he is nothing like any other man i ever met! so yes there are quality men, and guess what, he's freaking hottt too! keep your head up!

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