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Anonymous asked in Pregnancy & ParentingOther - Pregnancy & Parenting · 1 decade ago

Is it right that I am made to feel wrong about Bottle Feeding?

I had to bottle feed my first born as he was very premature and too weak to feed from me - I tried to keep up with expressing but with caring for him in the ICU and getting over a c-section I had to turn to the bottle.

I have now chosen to bottle feed my next one regardless as I actually liked bottle feeding plus my husband helped feed our first and I would like him to be as involved this time around.

Also, I didnt actually like it, it made me uncomfortabnle and awkward and I was so much happier when I bottle fed that I was a happier mother long term.

Why do people still make me feel like a s**t mum cause I have made MY choice? The midwives will hardly look at me now and people who have asked me turn away in disgust when I tell them my choice.

Why am I made to feel so bad - it is really upsetting me. Here you go everyone, time to have a good go at me on here too!


Wow, I actually didnt expect to get any support on here - thanks everyone (so far, hee hee)

20 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    I tried breast feeding my baby. I did it for 3 days, then noticed my nipples were bleeding. I showed baby's dad and asked him "If this was your 'private parts' and you knew that there was a perfectly reasonable and nutritious way to feed your baby that didnt involve you bleeding, would you continue to suffer?" He looked at me like I was crazy and said that he doesn't think there is a man out there who would be willing to have his sensitive parts bleeding if there is an alternative. That was all I needed to hear.

    Now we "split" the night shifts and every few nights I get a good night's sleep. I couldnt do that if I was breastfeeding. I am a much better and more patient mother when I can have daddy do baby duty to give me a break.

    So far, Lila is healthy, smart and has yet to be sick so I think she is doing okay.

    People will always tell you what they did was better.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I don't have kids but I would certainly not think it's OK for others to make you feel bad for your choice. It's going to mess you up more doing something that makes you uncomfortable and get you off to a bad start emotionally for what might be a really emotionally trying time for you. We know that breast milk is the best for babies but if you're expressing it then there really is no difference. If you can't do that, well at least you've thought about it and still want to do the best you can. People have no right to make you feel bad. You're obviously a caring mother or you wouldn't come here for advice on the matter. On a personal note, I'm sure that if I ever have kids (I'd better hurry up lol) that I'd prefer to express rather than breastfeed directly.

  • 1 decade ago

    dontworry about what others think. Many people really have problems when it comes to breast feeding. With my 1st child, i was in so much pain when he was feeding, it was unbearable. Also, some nights i would be so exhaust that it would be difficult to comfortably hold the baby up while he ate. I chose to pump my milk and bottle it, instead of feeding directly from the breast with my second child and will probably do the same with the 3rd.

    To breast feed or bottle feed is a personal preference, that i really feel is no ones business. Its not like others can look at your child and say, " i can tell he was a bottle baby or a breast baby..." You seem like a good mother, and should have the right to choose how to nurture your child w/o the drama of others butting in your business.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I don't know weather you mean expressed bottle feed for formula sorry.. But anyway..

    Honestly, do people know whats in your child bottle? They don't know if it's formula or expressed milk.

    I know what you mean about people being rude. I couldn't feed my son after 5 1/2 weeks and people made me feel like a failure because I didn't want my son to feed off me for 1 hr and then be hungry 15mins later so I made the decision to bottle feed and have no looked back.

    Also it is YOUR decision at the end of the day no-one elses.

    It's also great that your thinking of babies dad in this whole thing also. My partner didn't really like the fact he couldn't have 'their' time at 3am with a feeding because he didn't have anything to feed him with haha!

    But he also liked the fact he got to get up change him and then bring him in to me so we could all lay in bed together and go to sleep again..

    Anyways on with it!

    You sound like a very strong lady and you should be very proud of the decision your making because you are thinking of everyone not just yourself.

    I know people who wouldn't breastfeed because they didn't want "saggy boobs"

    So I am very impressed to see you have a great head on your shoulders!

    You should be a very proud Mummy!

    Congrats to you and your family!

    Also just to add there is nothing wrong with formula fed babies!

    My son is and he is in the 99% percentile for weight and length. He has never had a health problem other than 1 cold throughout the whole of winter!

    Also he is a little above his "learning stage" for his age.

    Source(s): Personal Expression
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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Don't feel bad. The way I see it is they make formula for a reason. If formula was so bad for the baby then it wouldn't be on the shelves at stores. A lot of people do agree that 'Breast is Best'. But it's your child, and its your choice. I formula fed my son. It took me awhile to decide on whether to breastfeed or formula feed but I chose to formula feed because it suited our lifestyle best that way. He is a healthy 9 1/2 month old boy. As long as the baby is getting fed and getting the nutrients he/she needs, that is all that matters and formula provides that just as much as breastmilk does. They have so many types of formula now that include nutrients found in breastmilk. Don't feel bad about formula feeding. :)

    Source(s): Formula feeding mother.
  • Some mothers dont understand that it is not physically possible for some people to breast feed...sometimes the baby wont take the breast, or in your case maybe too weak...sometimes the mother doesnt produce enough milk. its very unfortunate but you shouldnt feel bad at all for it. its not your fault. and you probably felt awkward because breast are a symbol of sex in our society. thats society's fault!

    but i dont understand the mothers that KNOW its better for the baby from the begining and are perfectly capable of breastfeeding, because it baffles me why they wouldnt want the best nutrition for their child! but i do understand that there may be specific factors preventing some mothers from doing this....medication is another. it just burns me when mothers just dont care about it. and its cheaper! and you can always pump and bottle feed! but NOONE should assasinate your character over this. everyone is intitled to their own decision as to whats best for their children. it is wrong to insult you, and people should definately NOT do it.

  • 1 decade ago

    My cousin was disgusted by the milk coming out of her breasts,

    the all the nutrition's medic ins are there in mother make milk ,

    no side effects,

    the bay are very fine ,not to attack

    any deceases ,i suggest to not to feed

    boo tel feeding ok

    so she bottle-fed her baby after she finished with the colostrum...

    I had a lot of judgment but he's fine and


  • 1 decade ago

    As an RN all i can give you if facts.

    Breast milk IS healthier for the baby's gastrointestinal tract.

    There is NOT a correlation in closeness when you breast feed and bottle feed. i.e, you child will get the same amount of maternal nurturing from you, and will get more from dad.

    We encourage breastfeeding because of the health benefits, but if your baby is healthy, and that's your choice, they have no right to criticize it.

    Good luck!!

  • 1 decade ago

    My cousin was disgusted by the milk coming out of her breasts, so she bottle-fed her baby after she finished with the colostrum... I had a lot of judgment but he's fine and she was much happier; her postpartum depression went away after she weaned him. I realized it was just a personal choice and I had no right to judge.

    I guess people make a big deal about it because they feel that breast feeding has a big benefit, and the baby can't choose how s/he feeds, so you're taking away a benefit unfairly.

  • Anonymous
    5 years ago

    i would not have little ones yet i could unquestionably not believe it rather is fantastic for others to make you think of risky on your determination. it is going to clutter you up greater beneficial doing something that makes you uncomfortable and get you off to a bad start up emotionally for what probably a slightly emotionally making an attempt time for you. all of us understand that breast milk is the prevalent for little ones yet once you're expressing it then there truly isn't any distinction. could desire to you may not attempt this, nicely on the least you have gotten notion approximately it and nonetheless choose to do the fantastic which you are going to be able to desire to. human beings have no ultimate to make you think of risky. you're positively a worrying mom or you won't come here for suggestion on the concern. On a private be conscious, i'm sure that if I ever have little ones (i could greater advantageous hurry up lol) that i could opt for to particular somewhat than breastfeed immediately.

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