Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Society & CultureReligion & Spirituality · 1 decade ago

Marrying a Muslim man as his second wife..??

I recently met a Muslim man, who is interested in making me his second wife. Is this something that can be done here in the U.S. because this is his religion. is religion an exemption from the law ?He said that he is able to take care of 2 wives only, because he also has family in another country.

I am currently a struggling single mother. and I think this would be good for me. what are your thoughts ??

Update:

oh, I dont plan on moving in with anyone, I have my own home, he will just maintain it, bills, repair work, etc. he will be with me 2 days, then with 1st wife 2 days, this is how it works. I dont want no full time husband no way

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    hey watever works for you i'd say go for it. just as long as u don't go getting jealous cuz he's with his other wife and stuff i guess you guys would have to set boundaries or something like that, but ummmmmm good luck!

    Source(s): ~Ms. K.~
  • 1 decade ago

    No you can not become his second wife in the USA because it is against the law and you will not be recognized as his legal wife in the USA and you will not have any rights in the USA. No there are conditions on which a man may take a second wife. If there is no valid reason then there's no possiblity for a man to have a second, third, or fourth wife.

    Reasons for taking another wife:

    1)The first wife is infertile so instead of divorcing her he marries another woman who can give him kids.

    2)war. By marrying a widwow after war or during war the man is ensuring the woman's and her offspring survival and keeping the woman from becoming a prostitute.

    3)His first wife is old and can't take care of the house and his children so he marries a younger woman to have more kids and to help his first wife out with the house and his children.

    4)the first wife is ill like she just gave birth or in the hospital for a long time and he fears he might do Zina so he marries another woman who can satisfy his sexual needs.

    He has to get the first wife's permission to take a second wife otherwise he can't get married.

  • 1 decade ago

    Things to consider:

    1) Are you a Muslim?

    2) I don't believe he can do it legally in the U.S. because of laws against polygamy. But if the ceremony is religious you can move in and live with his first wife and kids and nobody would know the difference unless they choose to meddle in your personal affairs.

    3) Could you live in peace with his first wife and children? Keep in mind that second wives may not have the same status as first wives. First wives usually feel slighted when a newcomer arrives. She may choose to make your life miserable. If you want to live with her you must become friends first. She must understand you are not there to take anything away from her; that you are not there to take her husband's affection away from her.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    In muslin tradition, this is certainly fine. A matter of fact, the Quran allows the man to have up to four wives. But if you're a Christian, it is against what the bible says. According to the Law of United States, which is heavily influenced by Christianity, pronounce husband and wife as a couple or two people. It will be against the law to marry him officially. If you want to can still marry him but not through the legal system.

    Personally, I can understand your struggling situation but being the second wife is a inequality. Please make the wise decision

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    All 50 states of the United States, does not allow a man to have 2 wives at the same time, so Yes there is something that the US can do, arrest the man. You think you have it bad as a single mom, Just think how bad it would be if you try to marry a muslim man.

  • Tara
    Lv 4
    5 years ago

    First of all Islam as per the verse of the Quran does not endorse more than one wife under normal conditions. Most impartial observers always maintained that the "scholars" were always in on it when it came to distortion of God's words. The reasons for doing it are not anything out of the ordinary, peer pressure, fear of losing status, fear of losing position and of course fear of the emperor were all routine motivations. In addition, the distortions were done with specific objective of pleasing the ones who took care of them when they delivered and also "took care of them" when they failed to deliver. Anyone with two brain cells would at least raise the question; why is God bringing in orphans before talking about multiple wives? And why would they gloss over this opening theme of the verse and jump to quickly conclude that men are allowed to take four wives? Besides you cannot claim to be treating them equally if you decide to take a new wife without the consent of the existing wife (s) and new wife for marrying more than once. Good luck with that :)

  • 1 decade ago

    You cannot be the second wife in the US, that is bigamy and against the law, and why would any free thinking woman in her right mind EVER want to marry a Muslim man??? I would rather poke my eyes out with hot pokers than marry someone of the Islamic faith.

  • 1 decade ago

    Only if he agrees that you can pick up a second husband when you feel like it.

    Run as far away from him as possible,Honey

    You are jumping into a worse family situation than you are even presently in.

    Also report him to US immigration authorities

  • 1 decade ago

    You thinking this is good for you is your instict of a father figure kicking in.

    He already HAS a family and imagine how they are feeling right now.

    Would you like it if your husband had relations with another woman?

    Its basically bigamy.

  • 1 decade ago

    im not sure if its legal in the U.S. but i do know that the man doesnt only have to be able to take care of you both, but he has to treat you both equaly. if he buys you a car, he has to buy her a car. get me? also, im not sure if u are aware, but it wouldnt be a bad i idea since in the muslim religion, if you are both working, your money is your money and his money is both of your money. It is very hard for a muslim man to take care of two but if hes willing to do it then look into what you are getting your self into and what you really want. a muslim man wouldnt be a bad idea after all if you just want to get out of your struggle.

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