Anonymous asked in Social SciencePsychology · 1 decade ago

Would you do this to me and why?

Ok I am severly depressed right now.

I was with my Bipolar girlfriend for almost 5 years....Last December she left me for 2 months cuz she thought I needed to change....I was to blame for all.....she came back and I allowed her to even though she is the one who left me. We were together for about 5 more months this time and she left me again, with everything being worse this time and with her being nastier than I have ever heard or seen her. She is untreated and wild as a fireball right now. I know I can't force her to get help so please don't say that. Right now I am not supposed to contact her at all. Her friends are bad and they influence her and she is getting married to a girl she has only known 2 months and met over the internet on her phone.

I have psychological problems too but I have been getting help for the last 2 years. She knew as well as I did, it was going to be a process...and even though I changed some things and was somewhat better from the first time she left,


it still wasn't enough. But my main question is, is you were as unhappy as what she makes it seem to be she was to her 'friends', would you have came back to me the first time, when you didn't have to?

And the other thing is, is she leaded me on for the first 2 months after she left this time, and told me she still wanted me and then only a 3 weeks go by and she is rubbing the pics of her and her new girl kissing and everything else in my face as well as her 'ring' her girl got her (which my ex paid for herself) because her girlfriend does not work and moved from the other side of the state. Her whole demeanor has changed in a couple months time.

So would you have done that to me? I know I am not perfect by no means, but I am also caring and loving too. I have been through so much with her, through thick and thin, and even though sometimes we didn't see eye to eye or get along perfectly like the 'fairytale' relationship she wanted...I was still there by her side.

Update 2:

Can Bipolar people that are untreated still look happy in photos and stuff, even though they might not be?

P.S.- So there is no confusion, we are both girls.

6 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Yea, I was going to answer your question, but had other things to do today than read War and Peace.

  • 1 decade ago

    You said that she thinks you need to change - which means that she is unable to accept you for who you are. And the fact that she left you and wanted to get back together again (the last time) is just someone who's not ready to move on.

    Your ex sounds like a confused person. By showing you the ring her girlfriend "bought" for her is an act to incite jealousy in you. Also, she wants to let you see that she's "happy" being with this new person.

    You also mentioned that her whole demeanour has changed since she started hanging out with that other girl. Just shows my point of her being a confused person - she gets influenced very quickly.

    Sorry to hear about your psychological issues. Let the days mend your wounds. Cry if you need to. They're as therapeutic. It seems to me that you will meet a better person in the future. For now, cherish the memories. Forgive. Forget. And move on.

    Take care.

  • 1 decade ago

    I know you probably don't want to hear this but it's so unhealthy to be dwelling on this because she is totally screwing you over. I think you should be out having fun and don't be depressed.Just think about the fact that you will not be having a ton of drama in your life.I really praise you for getting your help, so having an unstable person in your life will only be a negative thing for you.

    You know when you are with someone so long it's like you become them? You should find yourself now,be excited to be a new happier you!Go do volunteer work at an animal shelter(I love animals, so it cheers me up knowing that I am giving them love and recieving it too) start exercising,photography,just do something you enjoy to take your mind off of things.I hope I've been helpful-Good luck:)

  • 1 decade ago

    I think that you can't have a healthy relationship with someone who is not mentally healthy, and doesn't seem to want help. You need to take this time to help yourself and worry about bettering yourself for a future relationship. All relationships have issues and you need to work together to get past them. Maybe your girlfriend didn't know how to work through the issues of your relationships because of her bipolar disorder. Regardless, she was a negative in your life and you need to focus on the positive. You'll find someone else when you are ready! Best of luck.

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  • 1 decade ago

    Of course people with the bipolar condition can look and feel happy, in or out of photos. Just because you cant control your temper and your peace of mind doesnt mean that you cant show any emotion. Im sorry to hear about your problems and im glad to hear that you are getting help. Best of luck to you!

  • 1 decade ago

    Yes bi-polar people look happy in photos. It's part of the illness- highs & lows. Would I or anyone else have treated you like this- Probably not -but she is bi-polar. Sounds to me like you'd be better off without her.Spend some time getting your own life together. Then when your feeling better -move on!

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