kj asked in Social ScienceGender Studies · 1 decade ago

Do you think mothers are guilted into looking pretty for their children nowadays?

I saw a commercial for a hair care product that suggested to mothers, "Put some "mommy, you look pretty today" in your cart" (This was particularly harsh, I thought)

Another commercial for a weight loss product where a woman claims "now even my kids say "mommy you look sexy"" ( This one disturbed me)

*"If you are like most people, you think advertising has no influence on you. This is what advertisers want you to believe. But, if that were true, why would companies spend over $200 billion a year on advertising? Why would they be willing to spend over $250,000 to produce a average television commercial and another $250,00 to air it? " Jean Kilbourne

Do you feel pressure to be a "pretty momma"?


BTW, I'm not suggesting, in any way, that children are making their moms feel guilty.

Update 2:

TERA: I saw a MILF scene on ER, a little boy told Abby she was a MILF and she didn't know what that meant so the boy's friends told her. Also, I have seen it in other things too. A show called "Weeds" and a teen movie called "American Pie" Thanks for reminding me about this.

14 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    First of all, this is one of the only interesting questions I've come across this evening. Thank you. Secondly, I think the pressure to look good is across the board - not just for mommas. It's relentless, never ending, and brain washing (if you let it get to you). When I was a little girl, I wanted to be Gilda Radner and Carol Burnett. I thought it was more important to be funny than pretty. That got beat out of me as soon as I made it to middle school. What a shame. I also remember in middle school that the other kids not only made fun of how I looked, but they also made fun of how my mother looked. She was obese. And the other kids made sure to point it out. I'm 31 now, so middle school was a few years ago, and it's only getting worse. Fight the brainwashing! And I'll keep fighting it too.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    No. I think mothers should look healthy to show their children that health is important. Nothing serious like diet pills, plastic surgery or even make up...but just being healthy. Exercising, eating right, taking time for yourself and dressing nicely should be done to show children that your health is important and as well as how you present yourself. This doesn't mean you have to be a size two with radiant skin...but you do need to be in shape, have had a shower in the past couple of days, eat something more than fried food and wear something that actually fits other than pajamas.

    Taking care of yourself so you are able to do things with your children is a must. If you cant take care of yourself you are just plain lazy and you are hurting your child. If you don't have time...make it.

    Those that believe that this is an "image" problem are promoting this selfishness that continues to plague America and now other cultures with obesity not just in adults, but now in our children.

  • 1 decade ago

    "Mommy, you look sexy"?!? That is SO disturbing.

    I'm old-fashioned enough that I don't consider "sexy" to be an appropriate compliment to anyone with whom one is not intimately involved. This seems to be a losing battle. But kids saying that to their mom?

    I'm not certain I'd go so far as to say that mom's are being "guilted", because these products are promising your kids will think you're pretty, not saying that they'll think you're ugly otherwise, and certainly not that you'll be a bad mother. I would say that they are playing on insecurities, but not necessarily that they are instilling guilt.

    Still, it's quite obnoxious.

    I still like it better than the guy who lost weight and says, "My wife says she doesn't find me as disgusting anymore." Guys, lose weight and the woman you love will find you less disgusting!


    Tera, considering what MILF is an abbreviation for, I would march them over to their parents and have a discussion about the appropriate way to speak to adults and to women. that is absolutely unacceptable and in the old days, a kid would have been told to go cut a switch for talking that way!

  • 1 decade ago

    No, I think it is advertisers are trying to make us feel guilty enough to buy their crap. I take advertising with a grain of salt. That commercial where the kids said her mom was sexy is obviously marketers trying to get people to use their weight loss program. I wouldn't take to much stock in the fact that the child ad-libed that comment.

    I have two small children and it is difficult to take a shower in the morning but I get up and take a shower and wash my hair, I put on make up and dress myself, albeit in a t-shirt and jeans or fashionable sweatpants, but I do it for myself. And I dress my children in well fitting, clean clothes and bathe them and brush their teeth daily to emphasize how important good hygene is.

    Obviosly, I'm not going to spend a lot of money on my clothes right now because my toddler son pulls on my sleeves or my infant daughter barfs up all the breastmilk she just ate down the front of my shirt.

    I make myself up in the morning because I have pride in how I look and I have good hygene.

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  • Wanna hear something even more disturbing? My kids' teenage friends talking about how they see me as a "MILF." These kids are between the ages of 14 and 19. I'm 37. Now THAT'S disturbing. And frankly, I don't know if it's something the media has influenced or not, but it wouldn't surprise me if this is the case.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Hell NO! I would hope my kids (now grown) would see that strength of character, honesty, faith and love would be more beautiful than any make-up or hair care product I may use!

    And the one commercial "mommy you look sexy" is quite disturbing to me also! "sexy mommy" better find a "psychaitrist" for those kids!!

    Mom's already have enough to worry about!

  • 1 decade ago

    Well, the advertisers certainly are trying to achieve this. It's awful.

    First, it was to make hubby 'proud' of their wives. And now, it's the kids.

    Who's next? The grandparents?

    To answer your question about pressure, it is yes, I do feel it. It surrounds me everywhere. From clothes, to dying your hair, all those weight-loss ads, exercise machine infomercials, etc. etc. etc.

    There's a physical obsession taking over the country.

  • 1 decade ago

    Umm no I see guilt more of after a divorce, for the child to favored the parent. In my opinion guilt is a useless emotion.

  • 1 decade ago

    I'm not a mother, but as a daughter and grandaughter, I wouldn't care what my mother and grandmother look like - so long as I know they love me. I don't put any emphasis on appearance - they are who they are and I love them because they are family, not because they look good; I praise them because they are wonderful people, not because they look sexy. That's shallow!

  • 1 decade ago

    No, that is odd that the kids were telling their mom she was sexy...that is inappropriate.

    However, I think it is important to have good hygeine and take care of oneself, manage your healthy and weight etc....it sets a good example for your kids so that they in turn will see that it's important to take care of themselves.

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