What do you think so far....?
My name is Claire Johnson and according to everyone I know I am the most perfect person in the world. I’m popular I have a gorgeous boyfriend and I live my life at the top. But the truth is my life is the most unperfected and screwed up life I know. Sure my parents look perfect and my little brother is an angel. But seriously that’s what we want people to see. The truth is my mom is addicted to heroin and my dad is a workaholic who sleeps around with each secretary he gets. My brother is addicted to video games and sells marijuana on the sly.
“Claire” my “best” friend Emma called. Sure she’s my best friend but I know behind my back she talks crap about me. Everyone does. Not to mention my boyfriend and her are sleeping together. Not that I care, I’m not giving up my most pure thing I have left for some dog that cheats on me. “Claire, HELLO is someone there” she yelled waving her hand in front of my face. “Oh….What….Sorry” I said quickly glancing up from my novel. She quickly grabbed the book and said what she said every day, “Why do you insist on reading this crap when you can just rent it at Blockbuster and watch it?!” She said it everyday; it wasn’t actually a question as much as it was a statement. But according to her reading was ridiculous, why read when you can watch it on TV. I guess she wouldn’t understand because the only thing she read was the latest gossip in People Magazine, but wait she doesn’t read that either, she has people read it to her. The bell finally rang saving me from her B.S. of the day.
I walked swiftly but slowly to Miss. Petersons class. I didn’t care if I was late or not. Not one of the teachers in my school would even think of giving me a detention. They know if I wanted to I could make the rest of there life a living hell. But what fun would that be. Screwing up peoples lives trying to compare it my own?! Ha, that would be hard to find anything quite as repulsive as my life. I walked into the class room late as usual. “Claire, you’re late” Miss Peterson said. I looked at her with a baffled expression and she went back to what she was doing. Miss Peterson has always been a quiet teacher. Too scared to even talk to me, I wasn’t as mean as everyone thought I was. It was pretty much an act that I put on. Maybe if I was some loser who just sat in the back and watched I wouldn’t be so mean. But that would be boring and who wants to be boring?
Brandon came over and swiftly put his arm around my waste and kissed my head. I smiled up at him. As much as I wish I could break up with him because our “relationship” was all a show anyway, I couldn’t do for the sake of my popularity. Breaking up with him would be a death move. He was the captain of the varsity basketball team, most popular guy in the school. Maybe even the city. It would be a suicide attempt if I even tried!
The day went by fast like always. I had A’s in every class that I know I didn’t deserve. I started walking to my car, dodging Blaire. I successfully made it to my care and drove away. My phone started buzzing. I looked up to see who it was and it was my annoying little stoner brother. I decided to ignore him. He wasn’t worth talking to. I drove up to my Beverly Hills estate. I looked up and the huge house sighing. I knew this house would be my jail for the rest of my life. I noticed a moving truck across the street at the Hilliard’s empty estate. Someone was moving in. I caught a glimpse at the people.
There was a boy. He was gorgeous. He looked quiet though. I decided to mind my own business and drove up to the garage. I swiftly got out of my car and walked inside. I ran upstairs to my room. My room was the biggest in the house; I ran to my window, taking a peek at the new family wouldn’t be so bad. I looked out the window. The boy across the street was looking out the window too. All of the sudden he caught my gaze. I quickly turned away feeling the blood rush to my cheeks.
My brother walked into my room. He had a huge grin on his face. “Smoking again, I see” I said to him with disgust in my voice. “No, but it wouldn’t hurt” he said. “You're such a loser; you need to get a hobby and being a stoner doesn’t count as one. You know you’ll never get through life like that” I said. “Well you wont go far being a ***** either!” he quickly snapped.
“So what do you want?” I asked
“Um, I met the guy across the street. He seemed nice”
“Ah and why would I care?”
“Like I didn’t just see you staring at him, you’re a good actress Claire but not that good” he said.
He quickly left my room. My phone started buzzing. It was Blaire. I snapped it open “hello” I said. Blaire’s voiced on the other end sounded ecstatic.
this is a rough draft so don't be too hard about it when you critique it. And I am looking for names..
I want to replace Claire's name and Blaire's. I need a name for her brother and the boy across the street!
ok, either I will change the heroin thing to like prescriptions pills or something. But her mom needs to be addicted to something!
- 1 decade agoFavorite Answer
I'm exhausted so I only read the first two paragraphs but it sounds really good so far. The mom being a heroin addict is a bit over the top because people can tell when someone does heroin. A little too much drama on that end but I really like the interaction between the two best friends. Great story so far. You have a knack for writing.Source(s): You may also want to try AbsoluteWrite.com
- 4 years ago
I do believe I have gone too far....and I am not even sure how far that is...I just know I am backing off