Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 1 decade ago

MEN: How would you feel if your wife or girlfriend worked for her ex?

I work for an ex. He's been an ex for 7 yrs. My boyfriend (of 9 months; we do not live together and live 200 miles apart.) is understanding. However, when I phoned boss tonight to request Thursday off (to spend time with boyfriend) boyfriend remarked that there is strong sexual tension between boss and I. (There isn't.) Boss is charasmatic and silly with me but he is in a relationship too, himself. I would like to keep boyfriend happy and our trust. But I think this bothers him. I'm considering leaving my job. My relationship holds much more value than my income. Do you think this really bothers him? I fear that if it does, he may feel dejected and stray, ultimately. Do you think he will start thinking this is too much trouble and stray? Do you think I should find other employment? Please explain why in your answers and be as detailed as you care to be. Thanks!

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  • 1 decade ago
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    My current g/f works for her ex, it was something I had to choose to get used to. (My ex had cheated on me with a realative of a co-worker) I trust my g/f and understand that if she wanted to be with him she still could. He has tried to "entice" her back, I think he is the type of guy that did not want to be with her but does not want anyone else with her either. We have actually all gone out to dinner before (I don't think he knows that she told me about thier past). I stop by her work once in a while if I am in the area, drop off a coffee or lunch. It all comes down to trust, if your b/f trusts you it should not matter who you work for or where you work. As long as you are not flirting or being overly nice to your boss what does it matter?

  • 1 decade ago

    I want you to put the shoe on the other foot, how would you feel?

    I personally think if you have not been with him for 7 years why would you want to be with him now? I personally don't think there is anything wrong with it. But sometimes peoples imaginations get the better of them.

    I would just be reassuring to your now boyfriend and let him know he is your boss and only your boss. I would stress to him that his opinion matters and that if this ever does become an issue in the future, that you would choose him over some job.

    I don't think you should change anything unless it becomes an issue.

    It is hard to predict what he will do if you haven't exactly talked about his feelings on the whole thing. Youw ould know him better than anyone and what he would do or not do.

    Good luck.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I think that would be a very uncomfortable situation to say the least! I guess on one hand you would want to trust that the feelings are no longer there between them> But the insecure part of you would probably have have time not feeling somewhat apprehensive :)

  • 1 decade ago

    Yes it does bother him ,and it bothers you too, otherwise I wouldn't be typing this would I? Find another job, and tell ex-boy to back off boss or not.

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