How do i MAKE a payment gateway?

okay don't be so quick to judge.. i understand its not easy and its gonna take a LOT of work.. but it seems like the internet doesnt want me to know the answer to that! i could find NO sources for this.. ok lemme split this questions into sub-questions so its easier to answer (..?) * is there any reading... show more okay don't be so quick to judge.. i understand its not easy and its gonna take a LOT of work.. but it seems like the internet doesnt want me to know the answer to that! i could find NO sources for this.. ok lemme split this questions into sub-questions so its easier to answer (..?)
* is there any reading material for this?
* how much investment are we talking here?
* is there a proper tutorial that gives any pointers?
* on a scale of one to ten how retarded do u think this question is.. as in how hard is this gonna be for a good PHP programmer (me)

thanks in advance!
Update: and we could do without the wisecracks thank u!
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