Did your parents ever tell you to be "in" or "cool"? One of mine did...HELP?!?

Because one of mine just did, and it sunk really deep. I know I don't want to live the stereotypical life, and I've come to accept that. I have a different set of hobbies and friends from the rest of my family, but I'm happy with them.

I was just arguing with my mom about the stupidest thing, and she said "Do you WANT to be in? Do you WANT to be cool?!" and I don't. She wants me to be this person I'm not, and she wants me to just turn into her.

Please don't tell me just to ignore her, because it's pretty hard when you're living with someone with a completely different set of values than you. Especially when this person is a meddler. She's always pushing her crap on me about how she wants me to only hang out with "well off" people, and I can try whatever method I want: yelling, calmly talking, writing her a letter, nothing works.

What should I do? My feelings are really really hurt, and I can't believe this woman is my mother.

9 Answers

Relevance
  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    *Sigh* A lot of parents don't know anything.

    My mom asked if I was emo because I died my hair black.

    My hair is dark brown, I just wanted a darker shade, geesh.

  • 1 decade ago

    Parents all have expectations of us. I think you should just tell her: Mom, your really hurting my feelings, I'M ME, NOT YOU! My mom wanted me to be the 'perfect daughter.' As in, if I cried I was punished, I had to be kind to ALL of my relatives, and basically be perfect. All my sisters and brothers have been pushed this way by our parents, they talked to my mom, telling her that were all different and we all see things differently. After that family meeting, everything got better. Your mom just wants the best for you, and tell her you love her, but you're your own person!

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    if you're happy; that's fine. Just tell her your friends aren't superficial and you like who you are. If that's no good enough for her; oh well. It's another person's opinoin. You can't chose your friends - and if you could i'm sure you'd still pick the friends you've got. I actually am sort of in the popular group (when i say sorta i mean they're my friends but not besties.) but even if they weren't popluar - they'd be my friends. I can understand; my mom told me the opposite. She said she HATED that I fit in and wishes I could be abnormal. It hit me hard too. It's always hard when someone (especially your own mom) wishes you were someone you just aren't.

  • 1 decade ago

    I am a mother of three and I actually can't believe she told you that. I want my children to appreciate life, and be thankful for what they have, not how many friends they have or how much money they have!!!! I am guessing your mother isn't really happy with her own life.

  • How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    as long as your happy thats all that matters....your mom needs to learn to accept you and love you for you she cannot change you!

    just because you do not want to be like her does not justify telling your daughter/son this. you need to tell her that she hurt you.~when she goes on her little rants just walk past her dont listen go to your room or go for a walk~

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Your Mom's a jackass! Totally turn the other cheek, ignore this lady. You have to be the mature one. Pay no attention.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    tell her exactly what you just said, show her this if you want to. she needs to know the effect she is having on you.

    whatever you do, dont change who you are for anyone, even for someone you love.

  • 1 decade ago

    Tell her that you don't want to be cool and tell her it hurt your feelings. Continue to be you're beautiful unique self. Theres only one you :]

  • 1 decade ago

    ignore them, parents tend to be jackass now days!!!

    Source(s): mine too!
Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.