Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 1 decade ago

what should i do about my mom??

shes been acting weird lately...now she always thinks im hiding something when all i wanna do is come home and go to sleep....she thinks im drug dealing or something when i go outside to hang out with friends or when i go to the store when all im really doing is skateboarding or buying paint stuff...plus she doesnt even let me do what i want..all i want to do is customize sneakers and she says no when i pay for the supplies and the sneakers myself..then she gets mad yells at me for no reason.. and now my father wont even talk to me becuz of all the lies she is making up about me drug dealing and being apart of a gang...she acts fine to my brothers and my sister...she only acts this way to me and i just wanna know what her problem is.. what should i do??

Update:

no i dont think i did anything wrong..i get good grades in school...but i think the only reason why shes acting this way is becuz i buy clothes for myself instead of letting her pay for them and i bought my brothers and my sister a few things too...i told her i got a job and then she had a talk with me about drug dealing when i told her i got a job at a shoe shop my friends father own...i wish i could move out but im only 15...

Update 2:

yeah i do get money by customizing sneakers which i why i dont see what the problem is..

18 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Talk to your father and see if you can get anywhere with him. If not ask your mother where she is getting her information. And if she does not have a good answer then ask her why she is saying things that are not true.

    I hope this might help you out, but you might want to seek outside professional help with this one.

  • Corona
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    Well, you are just going to have to show her with a mature attitude that she is wrong. For some reason, she has it in her head you are dealing. Now unless she is a crazy person, something had to make her think this whether it is true, or a mistake, you have done something to make your mom feel as if you are dealing with drugs. Talk to her with respect, and your father and do what is ask of you around the house without attitude and eventually she will get over her fear that you are doing something wrong. This trust will not happen over night. You have to continue to do good for a period of time, but don't give up. Your mom loves you. If she didn't , she wouldn't care what you were doing. If all you want to do is come home and sleep, then maybe you need some vitamins or something, because sleeping all the time isn't normal behavior. Just be good, no matter what happens, and for the love of God, don't do drugs. It makes people stupid and not care what they even look like or even smell like. I have a couple of people in my family that have done drugs in the past and they got to be very disgusting looking and smelling. They were idiots with no money and no drive to do anything with their lives. Stay clean and get educated and get out of your parent's house if you don't like the way they treat you. Just be sweet and know in your heart you are doing the right thing.

  • 1 decade ago

    Ya, when I was a teenager my parents accused me of being on drugs too! Even my teachers did! What was really going on? I was experiencing very violent mood swings from euphoria to depression. It sucked that everyone just said, no you're on drugs. Idiots, I ended up attempting suicide and waiting out my adolescence like a prison sentence while trying to harness my moods on my own.

    If you're truly innocent, then your mom is probably just paranoid. She may have watched a recent television program on teens, drugs and gangs. My mom is an intelligent woman, but when she would see those damn tv specials she would flip for about a week. I'd say just keep to yourself and wait it out. You know yourself, so let your mom be a nut.

    By the way, your mom can't really control the way you dress or how you customize your sneakers. She can say no, but why are you asking her? You're at the age where you don't need her permission to dress a certain way (well, as long as it's modest and respectful, although maybe teeny and weird to adults customizing your sneakers is not disrespectful).

  • 1 decade ago

    Maybe she thinks that since you're not "mainstream" that you're into bad things. Ask your mom to go skateboarding with you ;) haha, JK. Just give her a hug and tell het you know that she's worried about you, but that you really just like skateboarding...maybe you should explain skateboarding as a culture. Also, tell her that skating is your anti-drug and that it makes you feel good. Insist that she do a little research on teenagers and how they strive to be individual, because they are finding themselves...which is why you want to "customize" your own sneakers. What teenager wants shoes just like everyone elses, anyway!? Maybe you should suggest that she buy you and $100 pair of Nikes. Maybe that would be a little more "normal" for her...? She's probably not "lying" to your dad...she proably really believes that she's right. It is your job, unfortuanately, to make an effort and explain yourself and try to spend some time with her. She might just miss you :( Mom's love their kids...it's a fact. Just give her some love back and see what happens.

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  • 1 decade ago

    Guy, your mom is concern you are going down the wrong road. You should talk with you mom more often about you and your life, so she doesn't jump to conclusions. If she know how you are thinking about things she won't worry as much (she will always worry). By shutting her out, you are re-enforcing her insecurities. Think about how it would be like if she didn't care?

    I have a friend who has been mixed up in drugs since high school. It started out like no big deal, and now he is in county jail because of them. He has lost two families (2 wives, 5 children) because he couldn't kick the drugs, and they have kept him from the kids. Also, he bury a girl friend who contracted hepatitis C from him. This story is only one of a few that I can tell you about. Drugs can destroy your dreams and change your life too quickly. Your mom has good reason to worry about them. God bless.

  • Rudy
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    She got these ideas from your behavior. "All you want to do is come home and go to sleep". So yeah she thinks your hiding something, that's what Moms think.

    Hang out around your house with your friends so she can see what's up. Or come home earlier and stay up for a while so she can see your not on drugs.

    Maybe if she's sees everything is cool, she will relax a bit and let you get your supplies.

  • kitty
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    Action speaks louder than words.

    Show your mom that you are not getting into trouble when you leave the house.

    I have to say, being a mom of many and for many years, you are sending red flags to me too, sorry but I do have a really good sense of things.

    Why are you buying paint? Maybe to paint your shoes, but then what are you putting on the shoes.. I am sure its not mickey mouse, maybe more on the line of tagging???

    Why would a healthy young lady, come home from being with her friends and want to go to sleep right away?

    Getting high would make you sleepy.

    Your actions are setting red flags up.

    Someday, God willing, You will be a mother and truly know what a mother's instinct is all about.

    We want to protect our children and we try to save them from finding out everything the hard way.

    She just Love's you and you should be very very thankful, there are many that do not have a mother that cares.

    And for not letting you do just what you want, well kiddo, like I told my own kids, when you are paying the bills and have your own home, then ya can do what ya want....

    then you just have to answer to the Law, to your Boss, to IRS and mostly to God!

    You have it way easy now, don't blow it!

  • Lin B
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    your mom may honestly think that you could be out there doing something wrong. she is probably just being overprotective, because really a lot of teens are out there running wild and their parents have no clue. your mom is just trying to make sure that your not getting into anything crazy. she probably thinks your selling drugs because you have money to buy paint and supplies for what seems like a cool hobby. i suggest you sit both of your parents down and especially tell your mom that you are a good kid and that you know about all of the crazy things that teens get into, and stress that your not in to that. tell your mom how it makes you feel that she suspects these things of you. just tell them you want them to know that you are not a liar and respect them and their rules and that they raised you right so that you know what not to do and you wish that they would trust you more. hope that helps and actually works!! good luck.

  • 1 decade ago

    did you do something that you maybe shouldnt have done and she may have found evidence of it while in your room for some reason? if not it could just be a mother having issues with her children growing up- especially if your the oldest. Just talk to her and tell her you dont know why she is acting like this but its stressing you out and you dont want her to think these things about you

    you will never know why she thinks those things unless you ask

  • 1 decade ago

    Are you making money by customizing the sneakers? If not, you should. Showing income from a craft like that will no doubt lay a lot of fears to rest.

    The next time your mom confronts you about possibly being a druggie, just take her up on it... demand to be taken to the nearest emergency rooms and given urine/blood tests. You will have to VERY CALMLY get in her face with it and call her out.

    If she won't take you to the doctor for testing, then ask your dad to put all of this to rest by taking you to a doctor himself.

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