What is really wrong with me?
Ok, I have had depression before twice and got over it, and I did have panic attacs and I ok with those too now. however i have had bouts of paranoia and disconnection from myself sometimes and just feeling bad. I have negative thoughts alot and I catch myself now thinking these bad thoughts that automatically come up. Sometimes I feel angry alot and I have reason to be usually when someone hurts me. I always feel though, taht something is wrong with me and I hate this feeling. When my husband comes home i dont even patience to hear him I talk and talk and talk ( i am not that talkative) but I just cant relax with him. Anyway any insights will help oh and I have alittle OCD
Maybe I didnt post correctly, the first time I helped myself by taking baby steps back to life and it helped me. I am a psychology student as well so I know my theories. However, the second time I needed a therapist and I felt ok, now I do go to therapy but I just feel that something is wrong here. I just wanted some advice of people feeling this way and not grounded as I have been feeling lately thanks. and please dont tell me about depression, not only have I studied it extensively but I have also had ppd which is the most difficult to deal with, since I had depression before.
- 1 decade agoFavorite Answer
Hmm… Nothing is ‘wrong’ with you, I don’t think.
Alright, let me elaborate. Is this world, where everything is hectic and pretty much a race against all things inevitable, we humans create coping mechanisms. Whether it be long periods of time where you may crave aloneness, or something more unconventional, like, for myself, I… pretty much have conversations with myself. It helps me through everyday life, and if it does that, and doesn’t hurt anyone or anything, I see no problem with it. That's only my take on it, of course.
That being said, this is probably not the right answer, as someone is being hurt. You, your husband and people around you, maybe. So, I need to think a little harder… Alright. Let me think of all the symptoms you listed.
Anger; You couldn’t pick a more normal human emotion. Truly. It’s nothing to be ashamed of or worried about. Unless, of course, you feel it so often it’s taking over your life, or your hurting someone with it. But that doesn’t look like the case with you. It’s totally normal to get angry if someone hurts you, man, people might think something was wrong if you didn’t get angry.
Paranoia; This one really depends on the severity of your paranoia and what it’s over. I can’t say much unless I know about those two things. Do you have cause to be paranoid? My mother once told me some paranoia can be good for you, it makes you wary of people so you don’t trust too quickly. But, if it’s severe, talk it out with someone, it doesn’t have to be a professional. A good listener could help you. Someone that could help put you at ease, you know?
Disconnectedness from yourself; Man, I can relate on that one. It’s like, for me, every now and then I feel like I don’t even know who I am, you know? But, it’s not wrong to feel like that, it really isn’t.
Not wanting to talk; Again, there’s nothing wrong with this. We all get fed up or impatient at times. If you think that you should always be there to patiently listen to your husband, or he thinks that you should listen to him, or something, try and talk to him about it. Or, just tell him that you can’t listen to him. I’m, ah, a very honest person, but I know that people can’t just flat-out say something that might be perceived as rude like me, so… Say it gently?
Bad thoughts; That might be a bad thing. But, really only if you act on them, or if they’re very prevalent in your life. It sorta depends on what they’re about. If they’re about hurting yourself of others, or constantly saying that your life is miserable, pointless, and so on, they probably need to be worked out. And I know that just talking doesn’t always do the trick. It’s probably best to sit down and really think about them and what might be causing them. That usually helps me. If that doesn’t work… consult someone.
I won’t say anything about depression, because you requested us not to.
Hmm… I know how frustrating it can be when someone just answers, ‘Go to a shrink.’ or ‘Get some meds.’ and thinks that doing that will fix everything. I know firsthand that that’s not the case. Mental issues are things that need to be worked on over time, and the best people can hope for is to just get them in check, you know?
I hope I helped somehow… but, I probably didn’t. After all, I’m only a kid.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Sorry, ma'am, but you don't just "get over" depression. You might've had a powerful case of the blues, or your depression wasn't severe. It's not like a cold or flu, or even mono. It's worse than that. You may have anxiety, though, which would explain the talkyness and OCD symptoms (another thing you can't just have "a little" of). See a therapist or, better yet, a shrink. Some Valium might be in order for you, but that's not my call. I truly hope you do not have actual depression, and can clear your head soon. :)Source(s): clinically, severely depressed person on meds/medical records coder
- ErikaLv 45 years ago
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- Kathryn RLv 71 decade ago
It sounds like you have developed a severe case of anxiety that is something that that can be dealt with. I hope that you have a talk with your doctor before this hurts both you and your marriage. I know that when my anxiety was at it's worse it was very hard for my daughters. I snapped at them for no reason at all I would jump at almost every sound I didn't know where it came from. I was some times literately shaking in my shoes but after I told my therapist and he gave me something for the anxiety I felt a hundred times better and I was able to get my self under control again.
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- 1 decade ago
It sounds like you might have a personality disorder, but you can determine the likeliness by taking an online test at :
After the test results, which are immediate, you can research online.
Hope you find some useful info !
I just read your addendum. I am more convinced that it is not "just" depression. You studied psychology, so you will immediately be able to determine if you can identify with the test results or not. Take it.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
They didn't teach you this in psychology:
Depression is a direct result of your disconnectedness from yourself....
(what you are is inherently happy and deviating from that is the source of misery)
You're disconnectedness is a result of thinking so much....
Thinking so much is a result of getting your sense of self from thoughts....
Getting your sense of self from thoughts is a result of not knowing what you really are....
This isn't your fault. But, if you would be done with that.... simply see what you are and put your attention on that. I will point at it....
You are silent awareness, and this is not a new experience you have to find. You're aware of ordinary, silent awareness right now.
You're always and permanently aware of what you are.... because you are that.
You have discounted this and kept it hidden, and so you're miserable.
What you are is the only permanence you will ever encounter, so obviously if it's a new experience that wasn't here before, that's not it.
(But putting your attention on it will be a rather new development.)
I repeat, you are ordinary, plain, simple, unadorned awareness of what is happening, which is inseparable from the here and now.
So be here now.... put your attention on the experience of the here and now.... and this will be good medicine.
as with any medicine, putting your attention on the here and now does its work, unnoticed by you somewhat, at first....
but it cures you of the the misery of not being connected to yourself, simply because you will be connected to what you areSource(s): teachers
- 1 decade ago
DONT listen to others telling you that you should seek a doctor...its not pills you need..its love..its forgivness..its clarity..its purpose...its joy..fullness..richeness..purpose in life...to heal your past..to give you vision for your future...i tell you...i was so broken...comming from a bad childhood so a screwed up young adult life...i did some bad things...hurt some people...was depressed and tried different methods to be happy..there is only one thing that can save you truly...his Name is JESUS CHRIST..if you dont know him then just watch this free film...it will awaken your heart to the truth you are longing to hear... www.jesusfilm.org
- DeenieLv 61 decade ago
Ask your dr. if he thinks a low dose of risperdal would help....a fourth mg or half mg at the most. It'll calm you down. I take it for PTSD and it's the first thing that has helped me. (PS...when I take risperdal...it doesn't hurt when people are mean to me..that's the first thing I noticed about it...WHAT A RELIEF)