Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 1 decade ago

Why is the most common answer about marital problems on yahoo answers "Leave him or her"?

I can't understand this. Is it just to build points or what. What a bunch of stupid answers.

Like I read a post that a man was a wonderful man but his only quirk was that when he got home, he wanted dinner ready on the table. His wife said it was odd because otherwise he was extremely fun, caring, great looking and a great provider. He just HAD to have his dinner. Response, "Leave him if he is controlling" WTF! This was followed by several other people that say "leave them".

Is Marriage that invaluable to others? Seems pathetic. Do people not realise that many marriages have problems that can be SORTED OUT rather than "leave him / her".

Does it make anybody else angry that others would suggest this to anybody else so easily?

22 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    The reason the majority of these people answer questions like that with "leave him/her" is soley due to the fact that these people have grown up in a society where "a better phone will come out next month". Meaning someone better will come along...

    Everything has been handed to us. If a problem is put in front of us; we choose to walk away from it instead of working through it.

    Which is truly sad. In the generation of our parents Divorce was rarely an answer, now a days you can do it online!!

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Well I usually suggest couple's counseling in my answers. You can't just blame those answering though.....alot of times the women come on here and only give a few details....SELECT details I might add without telling the other side of the story. So, if you don't have all the information and the wife is on Yahoo answers saying "he hits me" or "he stays out drinking all the time" then yeah.....most people are going to give a one-sided response. People in general tend to ask questions in a way that will give them the response they WANT to hear. That's just human nature.

    You're right - marriage IS sacred but the problem is most couples don't go into marriage these days having the FIRST clue what marriage is about or even having a firm foundation in their own r'ship!!! The people on yahoo who tell others to leave their spouses AREN'T the ones who make me angry. The people who make me angry are the idiots who GO INTO MARRIAGE so carelessly with a guy who has all these bad habits and you already have this horrible r'ship but somehow you think being married is going to magically FIX everything? nope.

  • 1 decade ago

    I completely understand. I posted a genuine question and i really needed input and help and i got shitty answers like "oh he moved on" or "leave him there are others out there". I guess these are the ones who have never been there and don't know what it is like to be willing to fight for what you love and not give up so easily. Or these are the people who would rather run away and give up than try to make things right. I don't know but yes it makes me mad to see that, because some of these people can't talk to anyone else and turn to this silly website for real advise.

  • 1 decade ago

    No,it's not invalued by others but I guess people

    are already having that in the back of the head what they

    want from their relationship they just want to know if they are thinking the right way in asking people because they don't want to be wrong.. liek the other person said there's alot of younger people answering these questions hey I'm young too but If I don't think I can be of any assistance I leave the question be good luck =]

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  • 1 decade ago

    I agree. It frustrates me when I see so many encouraging to throw in the towel on issues that could be resolved if there was some willing effort to work things out rather than walk away. I don't think people are on here to hear what they want to hear. I think most are truly searching for answers and regardless as to whether or not anyone knows anyone on these talk threads people do consider the responses given whether good or bad. I personally do not want to be accountable for ill advise of throwing away the marriage when there may other methods of resolve to restore the conflict or issues that are going on.

  • 1 decade ago

    Probably because people are lazy, and just want to earn points for answering a question.

    Also, I suspect a lot of the people who give that kind of answer are either very young, or have never been married, and don't realize how complicated marriage can be.

    I fit into both of those categories (young and never married, not lazy and points-crazy), so I don't usually answer questions about marriage problems. When I do, I try to actually think about my response, and give answer that I think will actually help the asker.

  • Wiser1
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    Most of the answers that say "leave" are over guys who are abusive to women. Women today should not stay with men who hit them, control them, emotionally abuse them, or make DEMANDS on them. I rather doubt that a man who demanded to have his food prepared for him and on the table exactly when he got home was TRULY a good guy in other respects, either. I think she wants people to think he's perfect otherwise because she, duh, married him. But, honestly, if she has told him, repeatedly, that she'll help him fix dinner, but not be his slave, and he's still making demands, she SHOULD leave him. Usually, people who write things on here have had these problems for a long time and they are not getting resolved. Many people refuse to TRY to work out their problems. She might want him to try to let up on his demanding ways, but he may be constantly refusing to do that.

    Source(s): I have been married over 30 years, and I do believe that if my husband had ever abused me, I would have left. Luckily, I'm marred to a great guy and we are able to work out our differences. *we did that years ago, actually.*
  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I think that misery loves company. Would it be safe to assume that the greatest majority of people here are not happy in their relationship or else they do not have one to be happy in? That could be because they expect perfection and that person does not exist. They are not happy, so if they can be a part of preventing someone else from being happy, they have more company.

    If there was a way to only allow happily married (or in a relationship) people to comment here, I think there would be less of kick-em-to-the-curb going on.

    A mate that is "near perfect" is pretty good in my opinion. If I were with a woman and she was perfect in every way, but she wanted the grass kept to a maximum of 3.5", I'd be a grass cuttin' fool. :)

  • 1 decade ago

    Perhaps you should question why soo many peep are asking the question. We do not know the people asking questions and we dont know the persons they are involved with so why us mere electronic figures questions that involve their personal lives. The bottom line is do any of us really care how any of the people online make out? NO! Why? because we do NOT know each other and thats the facts of the matter. I wish folk well but I don't know any of you and I don't really care about you. I am here to give MY opinion/advice....take it or not. Its your life!!!

  • 1 decade ago

    I usually recommend counseling for issues that can't be worked out as a couple and I get more thumbs down then I get thumbs up. Many people on this site are just cynical and put answers down that incite anger rather then give real advice.

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