My boyfriend refuses to give me oral sex.?
OK so I enjoy giving my boyfriend oral sex. He loves it as well. Doesn't ask for it too often but when the mood strikes I like to please him. We have been together almost a year and he has not EVER gave me oral sex. We are very sexual and have a great sex life. He is the only man who has been able to give me an orgasm while having sex.
But I enjoy oral sex and really want him to do that for me. He claims that he hates the smell and it makes him gag. Now I am a clean person "down there" and never had any complaints from other boyfriends. In fact my last boyfriend loved giving me oral sex. What a reality shock to go from getting it all the time to NOTHING.
I don't know how to change his mind. I'm not sure if since he had a bad experience before he won't try it on me. I keep asking him and he keeps saying I shouldn't force him to do something he hates.
Please help any ideas to get him to do this for me?
- 1 decade agoBest Answer
I know exactly where you're coming from - I have the same problem. I'm always giving my boyfriend oral sex but he won't do it unless I've just had a shower right before it and even then he doesn't do it that regularly - and like you I NEVER had any complaints in the past and my personal hygiene is very good. Maybe if you suggested having a long shower/bath together and that maybe he could do that to you afterwards. If it's the smell that turns him off well he can guarantee for himself that you'll smell like roses from the shower if that's what he wants!!
If he still doesn't want to please you like this then I'd do what a lot of other people here have said and not give him any. What's good for the goose and all that...!!
- SandraLv 44 years ago
I would keep things supervised, but remember, ya can't get knocked up from oral. If she is in a monogamous relationship and they have resisted vaginal penetration this long, you may want to approach this issue differently, and rather than making it a punitive thing to get on the pill, you may try giving her more control by requesting that she see an OB/GYN now that she is active, starting to have PAP tests and such. (turn it into a I am worried about your health, not a For Pete's sake don't get yourself pregnant issue)It may not hurt to point out that sharing bodily fluid carries the risk of STDs, and that until she has a ring on her finger she should use condoms, even during oral. You need to keep a dialoge open, and it seems like you are coming at this in a very harsh I CANT BELIEVE IT kind of way. Teenagers don't respond very well to judgement, and I am sure she is embarassed. Also, she can't change what has already occured. I am not saying that makes it better or right, but she probably needs you now more than at any other time, so it's a bad time to make enemies.
- 1 decade ago
You should never force a person to perform a sexual act that makes them uncomfortable. It doesn't seem like it's a big deal to you, but too him obviously it is. You’ve discussed it he has repeatedly stated this isn't something he wants to do, so you should drop it. That being said, healthy communication in a sexual relationship or any relationship is the key to making it work. If it is really taste and not the act that bothers him there are a couple things you can do to make it better if he is willing to try them. If he isn't then really the whole thing needs to be dropped. Okay flavored lubricants, some of them are super tasty some of them really aren't. I would go to a sex shop and ask an attendant for help in what's the best, they also have, (and this is a personal favorite) sexual poprocks for oral sex (I love poprocks) and they feel fantastic, so it takes a lot of the taste away and flavors it with candy. They have chocolate you can pour down there, really a whole variety of different things. To get him into the idea, guys are really visual creatures, you can taste yourself and then kiss him, and ask him if it was that bad...but I can't stress not to push it enough.
- Andy CLv 51 decade ago
try open communication and exploring diffrent possibilitys.
(like whgat really is prob, oki changing or enahncing the falvour what options are there for you to do that? diet? perhaps making it more playful (to remove pressure) or more timid so he can slowly advance and gain confidence, what about barriers like a latex shet over it (no flavour!)
and for ssome guys yes the flavour is really bad - no matter how clean (lets put it this way any veg or meat you dont like? y? - now imagine someone wanting you to cahnge so you like it) - same goes with other things tho not just flavour - dont push someone to do what they dont want - if you succed it only looks that way in the short run, the long run well you've undermined their trust, belief and faith in you. bye bye safety with you, hello someone new. - but then it depends on how far you take thigs you see
becareful following the path you are, and be sensitive trying to push someone on that can really muck things up. reasons I think are obvious. just cos one does like doesnt mean another would. just cos one finds something easy doesnt mean another would.
and if your need as great as a few seem to suggest, get it on the side, if you follow that advice, well, my wishes for you dont bode well to type. bring it to an end, dont play games.
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- Anonymous1 decade ago
Well, don't force him into a corner but make him aware that he should compromise. If you give him pleasure, he should be able to do the same for you. I can understand why he would dislike it (smell) but if you are clean as you say you are, then he shouldn't have a problem. I suggest talking to him thoroughly about this topic to see why he hates cunnilingus & see what you should do from there.Source(s): Facts not fanboyism...
- 1 decade ago
His refusal to return the favor orally seems extremely selfish to me. Even if he's had bad experiences in the past, if he cares about you and your sex life, he should find ways to make it more pleasurable for him. Personally, his b.s. excuse of "don't force me to do something I hate" is asinine. He's never even tried oral sex on you, so how is he so sure he'll hate giving you pleasure?
I'd tell your man that you're sick of excuses. You're willing and eager to give him pleasure. If he doesn't at least try giving you oral or experiment with ways to make it more tolerable for him, he's a selfish lover and someone you should probably kick to the curb. A man who's selfish in the bedroom is generally selfish in other areas of his life. Plus, there are plenty of men out there who love nothing more than to bring you to the heights of pleasure orally.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Something wrong with yer man babe, going down on a woman turns me on something crazy and i will admit to coming prematuraly a couple oftimes during this as her excitement drives me crazy, i said it in an earlier question that i always like to go down on a woman and make her come because the continuing sex session always gets better.Source(s): Personal experience.
- 1 decade ago
He must be mad!
I've always enjoyed doing this. No idea how you get him to change his mind, other than refusing his pleasure before yours! Or remind him that there are plenty others out here happy to oblige.
- FanshaweLv 61 decade ago
I agree with your boyfriend, you shouldn't force him to do something he hates. Turn the situation around; I'm sure there is something that you would hate doing.
If he asked you to stick your tongue up his anus, would you do it? Or would you drink his p*ss or eat his sh*t? Perhaps you would. I don't know you.
You could try applying some of his favourite food to your c*nt (risking a dose of thrush maybe) to see if that will tempt him. Otherwise, if receiving oral sex matters that much to you then I fear that you will have to find another boyfriend who does like growling at the badger!
- Anonymous1 decade ago
I seriously think you should stop giving him oral then.. It should work both ways.. If he doesn't want the same. Then he obviously isn't the guy for you. I'm sorry.