Sex is an important part of a healthy relationship. Granted, it should not be the only focus and each couple has their own "standards" for what constitutes a "healthy" amount of sex. One couple may be satisfied with once or twice a month, while another couple's "healthy" amount consists of at least once a day. And with that, every couple's "amount" will change and vary throughout the years. One month, they may be bunnies, the next they might as well join a convent. The only time it *should* be a concern is when it causes one person or both to be unhappy or unsatisfied. Sex is a great way to spend "quality time" together, but not the only way a couple should be sharing time. Conversation should be the primary goal of time together. From what I read in most people's answers, they are not saying that sex is not important in a marriage, they usually are just saying that it shouldn't be the main thing in a marriage. Marriage and relationships take a lot of work in many aspects. From communication, to trust, to sexual happiness.......I think most people, depending on the question, are usually just trying to point THAT out. They are maybe trying to have the person that asked about it to look at other areas in their relationship and see if they should be concerned about their sex life. Is their spouse pulling away in other areas as well? Have they been more stressed lately with work or whatever? There are so many things that can put a damper on a person's sex drive, that maybe they are just suggesting to the person to look at all areas of their spouse and relationship before jumping to conclusions that they are not wanted or being cheated on or whatever.