HELP - My sons girlfriend is leaving him, he can't afford the house & cars. What should he do?

The house is in his name, they just got it in March 07, the car loan & title is in his name, the truck title is in his name but the truck loan is in her name. He owes 15 thousand on the car and more on the truck but wants to keep the truck, she don't want either and won't help on payments after this month.

How does he go about getting rid of the car? Sell it privately if he can within the month? What other options does he have?

I just don't know what to tell him. He financed 100K for the house and did enough work to add a good 20K to the selling price, should he sell the house to get out of debt or what?

Any advice will be greatly appreciated, please help. He is 22 years old and makes good money but just not enough.



Yes, it is his problem, but since I am his mom, I want to help him.

Unfortunately, sometimes the best lessons learned are the hardest ones to go through. I'm not gonna make the problems go away however, I would never desert him at a time like this, NEVER. I just can't help financially and we really don't know what to do or where to even start.

Thanks to all you who are answering, I appreciate it!

12 Answers

  • Shayna
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Firstly, he should check out his responsibilities regarding the truck. He may not be responsible for paying it if the loan is solely in her name, and if he's not, he should forget it and let her take the credit hit.

    Options on the home are: sell it, if the market is favourable, or rent. Does he live near a college or university? If he does, he could potentially rent out rooms to students for a decent price. That, of course, comes with possible problems, but if he lays down house rules very clearly up front, he could probably find responsible students. It's an option for him to look into.

    As for the car: he'll probably need one, but can he afford the car and the house (assuming the truck is out of the picture)? If he can, stick with it. If not, he'll have to sell it, privately would get him more, and buy something else.

  • 1 decade ago

    First of all , what ever is in her name ..forget it . Secondly , He may have to just sell off everything to include personal assets , if he just sells off the cars ,and house , he may have to take a few thousand dollar loss , I do not know why everybody on here keeps talking about buying something else with the cash made , the loan for the 100 k on the house plus the 20k fixing up he did , will still most likely not equal what is owed to pay off the loan , same on the cars , he owes more than the value of his house ,and his cars , the only way to get rid of it in a short amount of time may be to take a loss , as with most things , mistakes do cost money . There is no real easy way out . I do wonder how she got the loan in her name ,and the truck title is in his name , did she just do a signature loan , if the truck loan is not secured by the truck do not worry about it , tell him to keep the truck . That seems to be the only way she could get the loan for a car that is in his name . As i was saying about the house , if he financed the house for 100 k for thirty years he actually owes on or about 200k so the fix up work is just a loss , he can talk to the mortgage company or bank , and see about selling it as a take up payments kind of thing if the loan is transferable, which many are not , and not too many people are smart enough to demand that it be included in the final closing agreement . Either way he will have to take a loss or file as being bankrupt , If he gets out with no loss or lesson learned he will make the same mistake again , after all , that is how we learn from our mistake , I have been living with the same girl for 10 years , But when I buy something I make sure I can afford it with out her just in case she ups and leaves , plus I never finance a car it is a lousy investment , As far as the house , the market is not in favor of the sellers , it is a market for the buyer which means he will take a loss , but it will be better to have to have a loss of 10k than to have the default in the loans , with that kind of dollar amount .

  • 5 years ago

    I think you're totally fair and sensible. The contract is a great idea. Just remind him that he's an adult and has to take some responsibility for his actions. Tell him that if you were sharing with any other adult, this is the minimum standard of behaviour you would expect. Don't make arguments about his selfishness of being an ungrateful child, make them about him not being adult about his responsibilities. Maybe you could go further with the deal if things work out OK, sitting down with him and drawing up a household budget and pointing out how much money he would need to earn if he lived by himself or even shared with others. If he's not working, make him contribute in a more substantial way by giving him responsibility for something that affects everyone, such as the family shopping. It might make him aware how much it costs to maintain the family. Don't worry, you sound like great parents and he'll grow up eventually. Good luck!

  • 1 decade ago

    I would see if he can find someone to take over payments on the car some dealerships will switch ownership as long as the new owner qualifies for the loan, that will take care of the car at least, if he wants the truck they need to put the loan in his name theres no reason for his money to build her credit if he cant afford the house he should definately sell it maybe he could buy a smaller house after he sells this one?? that sucks that your son has to go through this i hope everything works out for him

  • How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
  • Etta P
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    As a mother myself I feel your pain. You are right to sell the house, especially if market conditions in your area favorable. If not, maybe leasing the residence to at least pay the mortgage might be another option. Maybe he will make enough to trade in the care he has for a truck, inclusive of what may be upside down on it financially speaking that is. As far as the the truck, title is in his, but loan is in hers? thats unusual, but he should give back to her and if she doesnt want to with debt well thats on her credit. He might fair better financially to sell the house and take the proceeds, trade in the car on a truck and put enough down payment to keep his monthly payment to something affordable. But dont wait til his credit is damaged or he will be paying for his poor choice of women for many years to come. Hope this helps and wish you the best!

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    22 and he bought all of this (financed) with someone to whom he is not even married?!?!!? And did so knowing that he would not be able to afford the payments if anything happened? Wow!

    He should try to sell the cars and buy him a cheap reliable used car WITH CASH! He can also put the house on the nmarket if he can't afford it, but he is going to get killed trying to sell it fast/cheap and having to pay the fees so soon after buying it.

    Shacking up and mingling finances doesn't work out so well, huh?

  • 1 decade ago

    Hard lesson to learn. It's all in his name so it's all his responsibility.

    I would forget about her truck. She left him, the truck goes to. I don't care how much he likes it. It just complicates everything to much. He has a car and a house to worry about. He doesn't need to be negotiating on her car loan. If the truck gets repossessed so what, it's her loan.

    He needs to find some stable room mates to move in and help with expenses on the house. If he decides to sell it at least his mortgage will be current and his credit will be secure.

  • 1 decade ago

    Sell the car privately if possible, he will get more money that way. Also, he could get a roomate to share expenses until he decides what to do with the house.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    sell it privately. if it's a new car, he likely owes more than its worth... so he will be responsible to pay the difference... you could get a loan from a credit union perhaps... so he will be paying on a car he no longer owns... :(

    he may need to sell the home too if he cant' afford it.

  • Judy
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    Maybe he should sell both the house and the car, to give him enough to pay everything off, and start over.

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.