Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 1 decade ago

Family Dilemma?

if you hada mother who was losing her mind literally and was really mean with psychotic epsides. and you felt obligated to stay in contact becuse seh is going through a rough time and all that BUT on the other hand you were about to be a single mom and give birth to a baby and not under the best finanicial situation and you ahd enough stress in dealing wth that and need to make you baby the focus of your energies and you feel like dealing with the crazy mother woudl take away from what you ahvet o give to your innocent baby. would u feel bad about just cutting the mother out ofy our life?

4 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    There are other, less hurtful ways of dealing with your dilema. Imagine your unborn baby growing up to shut you out of their lives after a lifetime of loving them. You may not quite understand how that would feel just yet but trust me ... you will.

    I know first hand how difficult it can be to deal with parents sometimes. My mom is one of the most negative people I have ever known and very hurtful at times. It basically feels like a chore to spend time with her but I do my best and leave it at that.The thing is that I have to live with the way I treat her the same as you will have to live with the decision you make regarding your mother.

    In my opinion, the best thing to do is just limit your contact. Maybe just talking on the phone once in a while rather that going to see her when it's not so easy to escape

    If she is going through a bad time she will need the support of her family and that means you too. Would you really feel good about just leaving her to struggle on her own? Just try and do the best you can without stressing out about it. Treat her as you always have and don't let her problems become yours. All you need to do is be there to listen once in a while. You would be surprised how far " just a little " can go. I can tell you this much .... if you make an effort for yourself to see and understand her situation , dealing with it from your side will become less of a chore. Not because the general effort is less but because you will have changed your own perspective. A true understanding of someone can make all the difference.

    Good luck to you and your baby : )

  • 1 decade ago

    Yes, your baby must come first. But you can still have contact with your mom. When she has an episode do you call an ambulance or the police? She needs to be treated, even if it's against her will- especially if she is violent or abusive.

    Check out the websites Lenny provided. Also, contact does not have to be physical, you can phone her to see how she is doing.

    Congratulations on the baby! I hope you have a support network to help you during this stressful and exciting time.

    Best of luck to you all.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I would protect my baby from her (bc of the psychotic episodes) so I woudn't leave my baby alone with her.

    But just cutting your mother out of your life?!

    Imagine someday you get an episode like that and you go through a rough time.

    Imagine that baby you're trying to raise just comletely cuts you out of her life. How would you feel??

    Try to get your mother help. Get someone to help her or smtng. I'm not saying you should spend all your energy and time w her, but you shouldn't just cut her out like that.

  • 1 decade ago

    i wouldnt totally cut you mother out unless you fear for the babies life and if you do you really need to seek out some help for you mother asap and not be asking on here here are some websites. let me just forewarn you my friend people will critize you writing am not i think i am pretty bad myself so just be safe and keep the baby safe.

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