Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 1 decade ago

Anyone know a really funny funny joke? or a cool topic?

okay i liemt his guy and i tlak to him on msn alot and i want to make him interested and really make him laugh help!!

thank you soo much=p

2 Answers

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Here's two!

    Why are fish so easy to weigh?

    Because they have their own scales!

    This ones from Atlantis rising (It's long, you can copy n' paste it!)

    A guy walks into the local welfare office, marches straight up to

    the counter and says to the social worker, "Hi... You know,

    I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rather have a job."

    The social worker behind the counter says, "Sir your timing is

    excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man

    who wants a chauffeur/bodyguard for his nymphomaniac daughter.

    You'll have to drive around in his Mercedes.

    All your clothing will be provided.

    Because of the long hours, meals will be provided.

    You'll be expected to escort the daughter on her overseas holiday


    You will have to satisfy all her sexual urges.

    You'll be provided a two-bedroom apartment above the garage.

    Your starting salary will be $200,000 a year".

    The guy says, "You're bullshittin' me!"

    The social worker says, "Yeah, well, you started it."

    Another one!!!

    This guy is about to jump off a bridge, when all

    of a sudden, behind him he hears "Don't jump!

    Don't jump!"

    He looks around and there is an ugly-ugly old

    broad. She says "Don't jump. I am a witch and

    I can grant you any three wishes you want."

    He starts to think about money and cars, and says,

    "What's the catch?"

    "You have to sleep with me first," says the old broad.

    He looks at the ugly hag but finally agrees. They go

    to her place and do the nasty deed! He then says, "For my

    first wish..."

    She interrupts him and asks, "How old are you?"

    He answers, "Forty-two."

    And she says, "Hmmm... And you still believe in


  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    OK i love to tell jokes .. this one is dirty but omg if you get it its funny

    there was a lady and she said to her husband i want bigger boobs he said to her well go rub some toleit paper on them it will work honey just rub some toliet paper on them the lady said to her husband she said baby that wont work! he said well it works on your ***! lol {hey dont report me 4 the bad word it's part of the joke sorry if it upsets anyone}

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.