should i retain my fourth grader?

he is still reading a grade level below and math is difficult for him. I would like to retain him because this has been going on for two years. I have tried to work with him and paid for tutoring. The catch is that he is a young fourth grader (his b-day is in the summer). So while everyone is turning 11, he will be turning 10. The problem is that he wants to stay in the same school, but the districts policy is against retention. He would have to go to a different school district. I don't see the purpose of passing him along when he just doesn't get it. He has been tested several times and each time he is still a grade level below. He does not qualify for special ed. I need help because I don't want to scar my child, but I don't want to just "hope" it will get better and pass him and then he doesn't catch on.

25 Answers

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    It sounds like you know the best thing to do, move your fourth grader to a different school and retain him. He'll have a fresh start somewhere new and he'll get to do the 4th grade all over again at the same age as the other 4th graders. Now, instead of being the youngest kid who doesn't get it, he'll most likely get it at the same rate as his peers.

    This is a good chance to turn a new academic leaf for your boy.

  • 1 decade ago

    The research says don't retain.

    What do ;you mean, he has been tested several times and each time he is still a grade below?

    Did he get an IQ test?

    What's going on at home? Is he watching a lot of tv? Playing a lot of videogames? (does he have--gasp--a tv in his room? If so, remove it at once! That is a big reason kids don't read anymore and so do poorly in reading).

    I don't have a tv and my 7th grader just started playing videogames this year. He never got to play them before. So I have "walked the walk", and my kid does well in reading because he reads a lot at home--there is nothing else to do, ON PURPOSE!

    Why don't you buy/check out a book called, Overcoming Dyslexia by Dr. Sally Shaywitz and see if your son could possibly be dyslexic. It would explain both the reading and the math trouble.

    Your son must somehow qualify for special ed. I would get an IQ test done privately, because something is wrong.

  • Annie
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    This is a tough spot..I know as we had the same issue with our daughter. I admit I am confused by the schools policy of making him move to another school if he is retained a this thier way of trying to keep him from having social issues?? I would contact the school department for both your district and your state to check on this seems way off to me.

    As for retaining him, all I can say is follow your gut instinct. Fifth grade is a major leap in both content and work levels. Your son will be expected to work far more independently, for longer periods of time and with less help than before. He is quickly coming to a point where just keeping up may become too tough if he is not comfortable with the basic skills such as reading and basic math facts. If you truely feel he is not ready to move on to the next level, than keep him back. It is better to do so now than to have him do it in high school.

  • 1 decade ago

    Tough question. I have taught and worked with students of all ages for almost thirty years now and I haven't met one yet that I didn't believe could be successful. The difference is that some students require more time on task and, more importantly, different ways of learning.

    Teachers work within given parameters and are unable to always give students exactly what they need for their individual learning styles. Therefore, they can't keep up with the group and fall further and further behind. So what's the solution.

    If your child is having trouble with his reading, this will prevent him from learning in almost every other subject. Is he reading this summer or is he just "wastin away" the summer vacation with the activities most kids participate in. Sure, he should enjoy his time away from school, but get him reading......anything! The best way for him to learn to become a better reader and a better learner is to find something he is interested in and help him to have access to it. It doesn't have to be a subject that ahs anything to do with his school subjects, but simply something he wants to know more about. You have to get him excited about something and then find ways to help him learn more about it.

    Or it could be just reading for pleasure....a lost art these days. And as far as the math, you need to get a tutor that knows how to explain things in a way and at a level he can connect with. The last thing he needs is the same ple cut and dry math that makes everyon cringe. Learning can be fun a times and you need to be creative and get involved with him and make him and his education a most valuable possession. Good Luck!

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I don't understand the district's policy of no retention? That doesn't sound right, you cannot keep moving a child up just because they are getting older. This is not a great plan.

    If you feel strongly that your child is not able/ready to move to the next grade then I would talk to the teachers and find out why he won't be retained. If it is only because of this **** policy then change districts and get your child the education he deserves!

  • Linds
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    Do you have something like Sylvan Learning Center where your at. I've heard that works real well for kids. They help with the kids homework, how to test and even have special programs during the summer to help the kids.

    You could pull him back, but you would have to change schools, and he would have to make new friends and also losing the ones he has already made.

    I would talk with the school before you make any decisions, maybe they can work something out. I would even see about getting your son tested for a learning disability. I have one and know that can make school difficult and I'm pretty sure that would let him be able to get into special ed. My school didn't have special ed, so that option wasn't available to me.

  • 1 decade ago

    I would suggest doing what it takes to get your child to succeed. Too many schools want to label your child as some disorder or something so that they can pass them on to the next grade successfully.

    How convienient, but when did you notice his poor performance? It surely wasn't this single year, yes? Was their trauma in your child's life? Was there big changes to schedules?

    If it was based on just one school year, then there is summer school to help children catch up to the rest, but it sounds like you knew about your child lagging behind, in which case, there are programs at your school district to help children to learn.

    I'm a stay home mom now, but the first few grades of my son's life I worked. I fought and fought with the school to not "diagnose" him so that they could just pass him through as a problem. It wasn't until I got him on some medication for the symptoms of what was bothering him that learning wasn't such a problem for him. Find out what is bothering your child, because chances are it didn't happen just this year.....

  • 1 decade ago

    I would change school districts because it seems he needs to work more until he understands more. My sister was having a really really hard time with reading, but she is also young for her grade, don't worry he will get it. My sister was doing really bad and my mom got her a tutor and eventually it just clicked for her and she started getting a lot better. But yes, it seems he should probably stay back but work with him a lot this summer, sign him up for the summer reading program at your library (most library's have a reading program) and just get him reading a lot. Also you could get him one of those math workbooks and make sure you explain things carefully in words he can understand.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    no but you should get him tested you never know if he has a learning disability and more trouble understanding than others my neighbors kid did and he was in fourth grade and always getting in trouble and his parents didn't know why and one day he asked me if I could help him with something and it turned out that he did not know how to read and had some very hard times in school because of this he now is in the 11th grade and doing good but it turned out that if he hadn't come to someone at one point he would still be stuck his parents are always talking to mine and are so grate full because of this sometimes the kids just dont want help from parents so try a tutor

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Sounds kinda like me..... but I'm not young for my grade....

    I am now a high school junior and from the time I was in 1st or 2nd grade I did poorly in math, I began to finally master it in my freshman year when I met my math teacher, there was that special click, they tried to have me in another class for the first semester of my sophomore year and again - I was no good, so I got switched right back into ms cody's class... I'm gonna be with her again next year for my senior year....

    Basically, with the right touch, I went from math dummy to mathematical genius and I made a life long friend on the way... I also have been inspired to become a math teacher myself when I get out of high school!

    I know this info may not help you much, but I always heard you learn from other's life experiences, too

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