To the poster before me, there is absolutely nothing wrong with Durham...it has its bad areas but so does every other city. It's a perfectly fine place to live.
To the original question, there are tons of great neighborhoods in and around downtown Raleigh. If you are a young couple like you say, you'll like those much better than the boring dull suburban areas like Cary, Holly Springs, Apex or Wake Forest, which are sprawling and full of traffic. Look for areas near NCSU, around downtown, and so forth. You'll have better communities, walkable neighborhoods, and less sprawl. Plus the schools in those areas are less crowded because the neighborhoods are more established.
But of course, always consider living as close to your work as possible....with gas prices shooting up, roads getting crowded and so forth...that'll be the best decision you can make.
NC Native...Raleighite for 12+ years.