Lv 4
Kelrec asked in Arts & HumanitiesPhilosophy · 1 decade ago

Why are so many people lonely?

most of the people i have met, are lonely, only 1%, even less, of them don't have that feeling, why so? why after being surrounded by people and things which are really close, people feel lonely? and some, very few, who are close to no one never have that feeling? why so?

whats missing?

84 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Best Answer

    I can only say........

    People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges.

  • 1 decade ago

    I can only answer from my own experience, I think most of us are always living in the past or in the future. I don't mean to sound like a motivational speaker or something but I really thought about your question. I feel lonely alot myself. At those moments I am usually thinking about a pleasant memory or looking forward to an event somewhere down the line. I don't think I've ever felt lonely while truly enjoying the moment. The key I guess lies in using the moment more often. I wish I could be more specific but maybe that helps.

  • 1 decade ago

    People are born to this world lonely and after completion of their prescribed worldly journey they all go back to the eternity as lonely too. In fact, everyone is lonely. Since the Primitive Age, human beings had been suffering from loneliness, fear of unknown,and insecurity. So questions of survival drove all human beings to stand on social and common platforms joining hands together in unity and friendly bondage. Even after that people always remain prone to loneliness. Difference is that 'being lonely' someone can still live agile and worthy, creating a world of happiness and peace; whereas 'being social' some always remain lonely. However, 'loneliness' and 'being with many' both have got their own characteristics and inner beauty which can be better felt and evaluated in absence of the other.

  • 1 decade ago

    everyone is lonely in some way or the other. Maybe because the expectations are higher than reality. Or maybe because of the inability to get over the past so as to make a better future. Or maybe its not "loneliness" afterall, some people love to stay by themselves in "solitude"... people mistake it for loneliness.

    being surrounded by the "right" people is what matters, one person cannot feel at home even after being surrounded by thousands of people, if they are not the ones who can understand one's heart.

    People nowadays have so many personal problems that they don't even notice a person sitting alone in a corner.

    Who is responsible for this, i don't have any idea about it.


  • How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
  • 1 decade ago

    Good question: there are many good posts here.

    I think that loneliness is about perception, sharing and balance.

    Perceived isolation in any sense is at the root of loneliness.

    Perception: To perceive oneself as isolated implies one sees others as less isolated. Television does not help. The popular TV show "Friends" where these funny, happy people are always around each other and into each other's stuff is not reality. Among peer groups, there is a certain pressure to be in romantic relationships at all times or you are a "loser". Don't listen to this... it is a myth.

    Sharing and fear: It's unfortunate that much of modern society has become insulated from each other. From a young age children are taught to be wary of people (for good reasons), lock doors, fasten seat belts, beware of... everything. IM, chat, cellphone are replacing person to person contact. There is an explosion of information of "what not to do". People are afraid to touch each other and are afraid of being touched. I can't help but feel it becomes ingrained after awhile. I don't have an answer as to how to fix this... but I know that when I am having a tough day, there's nothing more comforting than a hand on my shoulder and a smile (from any gender).

    Balance: There is healthy alone time (without telecommunication) that everyone needs. But everyone does need to find others they can trust and talk to about things that really matter. People who can listen without judgement... that one can do the same for. We can be surrounded by "friends" daily but if the group is not really listening to one another... or simply talking about others, what are they?

    That all being said, I can certainly be lonely at times. I try to let those times tell me things: to do things alone and with others that are good for me. First to go back and find myself, then find others with common values.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    should be. Because many factors.

    a) The bad experience from the society

    b) The self inferior /superior ego

    C) The lack of awareness of self and others

    d) The growing circumstances and parents attitude

    e) The feeling and responding art of motion is inactive

    f) The relation ship of parents and children even

    Lack of communication is make longer gap between

    The relation ship. The sense of attachment and love which is

    to be inspire the life both side is missing , due to

    the western modernization living style with. The life

    like rolling stone ...there is no meaning each ones

    life, there is for some obligation , its for deadly life

    keeping. The education purpose is reached in a

    business trend, trend will based in profit, so there is

    no humanitarian dedication like the for parents take

    as the art of life with heart. If there is heart is

    artificial then result should be wart of life. so the

    option is yours.........

  • 1 decade ago

    I think it is the absence of trust in others .This obstructs the natural love that arises in our being towards them. May be, people have had bad experiences in the past in dealings with fellowmen.This makes them to get away from people internally in their minds and make them lonely at heart.

    Loneliness is a subjective thing.You may have met and spoke to only one person in a whole day and yet may feel very social towards the end of the day. On the other hand, when we are depressed for very personal reasons we may not see any good in any social meetings or conversations. We'll feel only lonely then.

    Basically it is the absence of that (positive) vulnerability which makes human beings social animals, creates the loneliness that we feel in ourselves or find in other people.

  • 1 decade ago

    Loneliness is a complicated thing. I believe it is a state of mind. There are two kinds of loneliness, Emotionally, and Physically. Humans seek interaction with others, it what we do. Sometimes a abnormal mental state will cause people to withdraw from society. Adversely, some people are to social and fill their life with social interaction to be happy. It is possible for some to be lonely surrounded with friends and family because they don't feel completely connected to them. This is more of a social misunderstanding than shunning. Unless your stranded on a desert island by your self you can move around and find interaction. The thrill of the hunt is enough for some to stay happy while other choose binding relationships. I am happy and I never have to be lonely thanks to a network of support from my family and friends. I think some people want to be lonely, just as some want to be sad. Maybe they lie to their selves or don't realize it yet but some people seek out sadness and loneliness to punish themselves for feelings of inadequacy or failure.

  • 1 decade ago

    So many people r lonely because they don't have the courage/ energy/ to share their expression and feelings. There are few reasons to this problem. Lack of power for balancing or overcoming loneliness since childhood or due to lack of empowerment, breaking of Close friendship/relationship, Guilty feeling due to mistake committed and difficulty in expressing it out. No courage to overcome new challenges.etc. are the main cause of loneliness. Simple solution to this problem get engaged with some activity which involve cultivating a thought inside mind to help others at least in any small way... This will lead a path to interaction with others and slowly loneliness will fade away.

  • 1 decade ago

    even after people having eveything in life are lonely- lonelyness is one think in life nobody every wants to feel - well this come mostly in people who are above 35 yrs of age. some of the youngesters who do not plan to get married early wait for a better choice with the result they are left alone with no one to marry them . and so they are lonely when they grow old and mostly in sickness when u wish someone at your bedside - u may have friends but they will be with u for such time not all the time. such people are depressed in life this is specially to people who do not have anybody to care for them. they feel life is not worthliving - most are parents who feel lonely when the children leave them in the aged home to make their career abroad they may send them money but little that they know money cannot buy happiness

  • 1 decade ago

    Actually all of us are lonely ..... When we come to this world we come alone and when we have to leave this world then also we have to go alone.. everyone has to cross his way of life alone. So loneliness is a relative factor. If we want to feel Lonely we can feel it living at the middle of thousand people & if we don't want to feel Lonely we can't feel it when there is nobody beside us. It's depend on our nature & mental condition. If we can adjust ourselves with our surroundings we can be the Happiest Person in the world. The people who analysises every aspects of life & becomes tensed in simple trouble he will feel himself Lonely . Life will seem to him very complicated & hectic . So be happy from ur mind & let things going on & stop analysing ... then life will seem to u very joyous.

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.