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Mr. Six asked in 社會與文化語言 · 1 decade ago

申請學校信件文案,希望有人可以幫我潤潤詞檢查文法

Dear Sir,

Thank you for the notification. I am really glad about I get the AA conditional offer. It also means I have to prepare many things as soon. Nevertheless I still have something confusing me, please see the further detail in the attachments.

Thank you for your kindly assistance.

Yours faithfully,

Nian Heng

(((本意)))

謝謝你的來信,我很高興我能收到AA的條件式入學。這同時也代表我必須盡快準備許多事情了,不過我仍然對一些事情有疑問,煩請看附件內的資料。

謝謝你的幫助

敬上

Attachments1:

While I study in college in Taiwan, my academic background was Architecture and interior design, and I am wonder why about arrange to the second year. In fact,I think study form second year can learn more things about architecture knowledge and steady own ability, wheaears I must consider the economic and some reason, therefore is it any possible to study from the third year?

(((本意)))

我在台灣就讀的就是建築與室內設計,對於安排至二年級我較為好奇是為什麼?事實上,我認為如果從二年級就讀可以學習更多建築相關知識與扎實自身的能力,但考量到經濟與一些因素,我想請問有沒有可能從三年級開始就讀?

Attachments2:

Dear Sir,

I have applied for AA school,

Unfortunately, I encountered a problem in my country. As the military service is compulsory in Taiwan for all men who are at the age of 18, I will not be able go broad for study if I don’t finish it.

May I therefore ask your permission to allow me to postpone one year for the admission?

Your kind assistance will be highly appreciated. Thanks for your attention.

(((本意)))

我申請了AA學校

不幸地,我再我的國家碰到一個問題,在台灣所有滿18歲且大學畢業的年輕人都必須義務到台灣軍隊服役,如果我不服完他將無法出國。

因此,我可以詢問延後一年入學的可能性嗎

1 Answer

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  • mini
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    首先,除非是有文件表格隨信附上,不會將信中的內容用另一attachment來表示,所以我將你的兩個附件內容合併到信中,這樣才合理與容易理解。還有,除非你確定收信者是特定的某人,否則開頭最好同時用sir or madam,或是直接用To whom it may concern。以下是為你修改過的信。

    Dear Sir or Madam,

    Thank you for your notification. I'm really glad to receive the AA conditional offer. It also means I have to prepare for it as soon as possible. However, I still have two questions as below.

    I major in Architecture and Interior Design in college in Taiwan already, I wonder why I've been arranged to study from sophomore year in your school. In fact, I think I can learn more architecture related studies and better my ability if I start from sophomore courses. Howerver, I would like to know if it's possible for me to start from junior courses, since I have economic and other situations to consider.

    Though I'm honored to obtain the AA conditional offer from you, I have a problem here. In Taiwan, all young men at the age of 18 and above should be admitted to the military service. No man can leave Taiwan unless the service term is fulfilled. Hence, I would like to ask you if it's possible for me to delay my admission for one year.

    Thank you for your kindly assistance. Your help will be greatly appreciated.

    Sincerely,

    Nian Heng

    Source(s): me
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