I need advice ASAP!?

I am interested in this guy and I think he might be interested in me. But a couple of months ago I told his gay roommate that I didn't know if I could date someone of a different race. I am white and he's hispanic. The reason I said this is cause I think my mom would flip out and I've seen how my family has treated my two mixed cousins and that. I don't know if I could put my mom or my family in that position because i love them so much! So this weekend I was talking to another girl at work. She already knows anout the situation and has convinced me to look beyond the color of skin or race and see the true person. So she talked to the guy ( we all work together) and tells me he said he heard that i didn't date out of my race. I told her how I felt and she said she would tell him.

I really like this guy and from the way he flirts I believe he likes me too. I need to explain to him about the whole race issue before anything gets serious. Any Ideas or stories that might help?


Any advice please! I am so unsure of what to do. It may be nothing but consider that I was brought up to believe that racial mixing is totally wrong and so was my whole family. We live in rural Kentucky. I won't hurt my mom if it comes down to that. I love er so much and i am an only child, even if it means turning down the love of my life. She means to much after losing my dad almost 13 years ago.

Update 2:

I am 20 and I believe I have a good head on my shoulders. I don't want anything serious right now cause I am concentrating on college just want to have someone to have fun with. A special someone that shares my goals and ambitions or understands them.

17 Answers

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Just follow your heart

  • 1 decade ago

    First of all, is he gay he a gay roommate? Ask yourself that first! I don"t know any straight guy w/gay roommate unless he's bisexual. Keep your eyes open and your ears. (U have heard of being on the down low?) But if u really like this guy than go for it, your feelings toward this guy must be strong if u are willing to risk the comments or attitudes of your family. And if the attitude that your family have against people of a different race is not the same that u share then go for it. Everyone have their own opinion go with your own.

  • 1 decade ago

    There's no harm in just hanging out or casually dating, but the issues with your parents aren't going to be resolved until you deal with them.Talk with your family and see what their problem is with interracial dating. If you think your family will react negatively and you wont be able to handle their disapproval then leave the guy alone. Its better to let him be than to have him get attached and you dump him because your family doesn't approve.

  • 1 decade ago

    WOW it's 2007 and we still don't date outside of our race...um look around girly.

    Here's a story...

    Once there was this girl that missed the man of her dream because he wasn't of the same race, she married the man that was the exact same color of her natual pretty self...golly it made her parents so proud,well that was unitl they notice the black eye he gave her!

    I think you should leave this man alone...if you have to play games and come up with stories, then someting is really wrong with your ego.

    Let him get with someone that can respect him as a man, not a color! "Despite what the fam may think"

    Get a back bone and live your life....for u!

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  • 1 decade ago

    The color of someones skin is not important. I am white and my husband is black. It took a while for our familes to get over that fact, but us ourselves, do not see color. You are your mother daughter, she should be able to understand that you are interested in someone outside of your race. She should be caring about your happiness....not some dumb skin color.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Okay you can date whoever you want forget what your family thinks it matters what you think someone of different race is no different then you if you really like him you will go for it and not worry what anyone else says!

  • 1 decade ago

    race shouldn't be in consideration if u love the guy. U must not love him because race shouldn't come into mind with soumthing lik this.

  • 1 decade ago

    Dating some one at work creates a big mess.

    Relationship complications, reputations, friendships, responsibilities etc are sullied very fast and easily.

  • 1 decade ago

    you are young yet, soon it wont matter what your mom thinks , you will be old enough to do what you want and make your own decisions and be happy with them or at least learn from your mistakes,,

  • 1 decade ago

    well, im puerto rican and black so needless to say, race doesnt matter!

    I understand wut u mean about upsetting your family, because my mother's father couldnt stand black gys for anything in this world but all of his daughter married black men! lol...

    you have to live your life for you and yes our families opinons are important to us, but we cant let their opinon interfere with they way we live our lives...

    if your family see's that this man is treating you with respect and making you happy, they'll eventually come around...

    just takes time...

    but i understand your situation

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